I am new to this group and first would like to say I did not realize my last name would be used as my UserName. My first name is Peter and I have been living with UC/CD for many years (I am now nearly 56 years old since May 8th is my birthday). I have a J-Pouch that was done back in 1992 when my doctor thought I had UC rather than CD. I am gay and was in an 18 year relationship that broke up two years ago. Though we had our differences, I must say he was very compassionate and caring about my IBD. However, in the last year before our breakup he did tell me that I could never give him sexually what he always wanted (anal sex), which upset me quite a bit at the time. However, in looking back, I believe he just added this to the list of reasons we should part ways. I lived in San Diego for the 18 years of our relationship and then moved to the Cincinnati / Northern KY area where my brother and his family live. The gay scene here certainly doesn't compare, but I have found people who are mostly friendly and helpful. I am a retired teacher who now works part time in airport customer service and loving it. I've dated, but find it difficult to even think about sharing the fact that I have Crohn's along with some of the symptoms that go along with having a J-Pouch (i.e. occasional nighttime leakage, etc.). I know that if I found the right person, he would understand, but as many of you know, it is not the type of conversation that is easily accomplished. How have some of you handled this? I wish I could find a gay man who also has IBD, a J-pouch, or an ostomy that truly understands what we go through on a daily basis for my next partner. I am thinking of joining the local support group, but my past experiences in these groups, is that gay men and women tend not to attend. Any suggestions? Match.com and Our Time.com has led me to date and meet other men, but has not led me to meet others who share our challenges and victories. Thanks for any thoughts you may have. Since I do fly for free, I am not limited to meeting someone only in the area I live. Happy weekend everyone! Peter