Hello everybody, I'm am writing this post with the hope of getting some advice on giving emotional support to my fiancé that is diagnosed with colitis proctitis.
I am not very good at giving her emotional support.
Our story started three years ago when we met and fell madly in love, at this point, she had abdominal pain pretty much every day and I thought I would be able to help her since I was just about to complete a bachelor of science in nutrition and food science.
We thought she was allergic to something in her diet, assuming gluten, doctors were definitely not helping and were not willing to help her get tested for celiac, and were not testing her for nutrient deficiencies. We went gluten free and she kindof seemed to get better for a while.
Things got worst, a new doctor finally suggested nutrient testing, a scope, and DNA testing for celiac, she was diagnosed with colitis, negative for celiac, and was low in iron and b12.
We continued the GF diet out of mistrust of the negative diagnosis and actually did some somewhat inconclusive experiments with gluten that still showed signs of an intolerance, she has been taking iron consistently, and self injects b12. We also cut out FODMAPS to her dismay.
My fiancé is in school and doing well enough there, I am our soul source of income and keep up to all house chores so that she can focus on school. I prepare her school lunches and do my best to keep up to her cravings while staying within a gluten free and low FODMAP diet.
The compounding issue we are dealing with is her chronic fatigue, she is feeling completely helpless in this regard and I am feeling helpless in trying to help her fight it as well.
I am finding myself incapable of providing the emotional support she needs to keep her level headed in spite of everything I do for her.
Our relationship is at risk because I am unable to support her fears of having additional health issues like her suspicion of narcolepsy.
My attempts to calming her down are being turned around as accusations of being insensitive and accusing her of not trying and are bring her down.
How can I show her the emotional support she needs when I am at such a loss myself?
Thanks
I am not very good at giving her emotional support.
Our story started three years ago when we met and fell madly in love, at this point, she had abdominal pain pretty much every day and I thought I would be able to help her since I was just about to complete a bachelor of science in nutrition and food science.
We thought she was allergic to something in her diet, assuming gluten, doctors were definitely not helping and were not willing to help her get tested for celiac, and were not testing her for nutrient deficiencies. We went gluten free and she kindof seemed to get better for a while.
Things got worst, a new doctor finally suggested nutrient testing, a scope, and DNA testing for celiac, she was diagnosed with colitis, negative for celiac, and was low in iron and b12.
We continued the GF diet out of mistrust of the negative diagnosis and actually did some somewhat inconclusive experiments with gluten that still showed signs of an intolerance, she has been taking iron consistently, and self injects b12. We also cut out FODMAPS to her dismay.
My fiancé is in school and doing well enough there, I am our soul source of income and keep up to all house chores so that she can focus on school. I prepare her school lunches and do my best to keep up to her cravings while staying within a gluten free and low FODMAP diet.
The compounding issue we are dealing with is her chronic fatigue, she is feeling completely helpless in this regard and I am feeling helpless in trying to help her fight it as well.
I am finding myself incapable of providing the emotional support she needs to keep her level headed in spite of everything I do for her.
Our relationship is at risk because I am unable to support her fears of having additional health issues like her suspicion of narcolepsy.
My attempts to calming her down are being turned around as accusations of being insensitive and accusing her of not trying and are bring her down.
How can I show her the emotional support she needs when I am at such a loss myself?
Thanks
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