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15 with crohns

Hi im a boy im 15, 16 in january and about 2 months ago i got diagnosed with crohns ever since then i had deppresion and anxiety i dont know if it was the medication i was on but it was one of the side effects but even now i still have thoughts about death even though im no longer on that medication anymore. I sometines feel as though im watching myself live life and i find it hard to remember things like what i had for lunch or what i did yesterday and im not sure why i cant remember some things. But i keep thinking what if you have to commit sewiside to go to heaven and its gods way to test if your strong enough or what if you have to live your whole life to go to heaven or what if there isnt a heaven. And then i think of before i was born and think that death will be a little like that as you cant remember anything from before you were born. Amd also because of all this i then start falling behind at school and then i end up lying to teachers why i havnt done the homework and then in parents evening it all comes out and then it all gets to much and my parents start shouting and are really dissapointed then start blaming themeselves. Theey then force me off the one thing that seperates all my worries from me which is livestreaming (playing games infront of people on the internet) i do it because i love all the nice comments you get off people. So my parents made me take more time off that which made me really struggle now, i would cry myself to sleep most nights and pace back and forth screaming asking anyone for help as i im so confused i just want answers. Im still confused but atleast now though iv thought about it so much that the pain has numbed. But i have caught up with all my school work and i have got my gcse exams soon. Thanks for reading and thr thing about crohns for me is that physically it affected me with really bad stomach pains, diyaria, blood in poos, ullcers, joint pain and bones locking so i cant move. But mentally its made me think more amd overall its been alot harsher and i feel as though iv changed and not for the better i miss the old me, the one that could think straight and not worry about things as much. Anyway thanks for reading again id live to hear all your stories and any feedback on mine
 

DJW

Forum Monitor
Hi William and welcome.

Sorry about your diagnosis.
Depression is very common, especially when first diagnosed. There is help, talk to your doctor about it.
Give yourself time to adjust.

Check out the young adults subforum. You're definitely not alone.

Sending you my support.
 

Lady Organic

Moderator
Staff member
Hi and welcome,
yes I would talk to your doctor about the depression but also about all the physical symptoms you are still experiencing including the joint pain. The first year is often trials of medication in order to find the one that could bring you to remission (no more disease activity). If remission is under control with proper treatment, you shall feel much better :) Try to remain positive this will come.
In the meantime, maybe there is a social worker, psychologist or nurse at your school you could talk to? If not, you could ask your parents if they can find a psychologist for you to visit and help you go through this new diagnosis. wishing you well.
 
Hi William. Thank you for sharing your story!

I am the mom of a teenaged boys with crohns. I think what you described is pretty common when dealing with the diagnosis. I hope you will share how you are feeling emotionally and physically. The Drs want to, can and will get you on a program that will address all of these. They need to know.

I can't say I exactly know how you feel but I did witness this. I am very impressed with the progress you have made in just two months. You have caught up in school and are trying to learn how to adjust to all of this I hope you are proud of what you've already done.

There are lots of nice people on this board who can share their situations and advice. I do want to point out there are many people who also have same diagnosis who aren't on these boards. They are too busy living their lives and don't even think about crohns because things are under control. You will get there!!

Please do talk to your parents and let them know how you feel. I wish I had heard more from my son in the early days. Now we rarely talk about it be because there isn't much to say!

Hang in there. Keep moving forward. You are worth it. You have so much ahead of you. Please keep us posted. I look forward to hearing when you've returned to good health and feeling all the value you have!!
 

Jennifer

Adminstrator
Staff member
Location
SLO
Hi Williamhi and welcome to the forum! :D

It can take a long time to accept the diagnosis and 2 months really isn't enough time to find a treatment that works for you. Are you on any medication currently, which one/s? This is such a big life change for you and your family and there's a lot to learn about this disease. As mentioned depression is very common so please talk to someone about it. If your parents don't seem to understand then seek help from your doctor or at school.

I suffered from depression when I was in high school as well. I was diagnosed when I was 9 and didn't do to well in school. Many of my teachers didn't know anything about the disease and thought that I was just lazy (it's an invisible disease). I had no interest in school and didn't do any of my work. I did eventually get help, went into remission, graduated, went to college, got married etc. I've been the admin here for a few years and have met so many wonderful people and life long friends. :) As mentioned we have a section for teens if you want to check it out: http://www.crohnsforum.com/forumdisplay.php?f=67

I've never done any let's plays myself but I love watching them. If doing them is something that brings you happiness and hope then talk to your doctor or therapist about it and they should be able to talk to your parents about letting you get back into making them again. It is possible to structure your school work around something that makes you happy so hopefully your parents will be willing to work with you. If there's anything that I can do for you then please let me know. :)

If you ever want to talk we're always here. :ghug:
 
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