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A bit of a journey and back again

Hi All

Some of you may remember me from a few years ago. I have had an interesting journey over the last few years. I have collected diagnosis' along the way including Gallbladder issues (had it removed) Pancreatitis ( about 6x) which was eventually determined to be caused by Sphincter of oddi dysfunction, ( have had the valve cut 2x) - and still have issues wth this and Pancreas divisum ( alternate pancreas plumbing option) which complicates the above. I have recently ( about 12-18 months ago) suddenly changed from diarrhoea to horriffic constipation, and have concurrently been managing significant 'womens troubles'. I dealt with the womens plumbing issues first as it was hard to know what was causing what, and have had a hysterectomy ( am quite young to have this) and pelvic floor repair- I was diagnosed with adenomyosis ( a type of endometriosis within the muscle layers of the uterus) and various prolapses. - dealing with some of which has resulted in an increase in quality of life. The Gyne specialist was a bit of a shock as I am not used to having specialists say 'here is what is wrong, and this is how we fix it'( not to mention a list of things needed to fix, but anyway). But I would really like to be able to poop normally - and this post is a bit of a 'here we go again'.

I am about to have a tele appointment at the end of the month with my gastro specialist which I am dreading. Partly because I think he will suggest colonoscopy - which kind of feel like I am taking myself to the vet!?, but also that whole -will the specialist listen - and take me seriously thing.
I am over having to advocate all the damn time (apart from the Gyne stuff)- every diagnosis above took...perserverance...- and also the waking up from a colonoscopy for them to say - its all fine. Well people - its not fine. I can't poop. and it really sucks. Partly this post is me acknowledging to myself that I have been through a bit, and that some friendly 'faces' may help on the journey.

( rant follows:!)
I am over having to plan taking 'poop medicine' around school drop offs and pick ups. I am sick of my kids seeing mummy take 'poop medicine'
I am sick of impaction protocols and enemas
I am so over having to take poop medicine in front of my family - they don't care, but it just feels degrading after a while
I am sick of having to discuss poop with medical professionals ( but am very thankful to have discussing gyne stuff be crossed off the list)
I am over having to take kgs of medication for me if we travel
I am sick of the 'will we being calling the ambulance tonight' debate
I am sick of being in pain and thinking, did i eat the wrong thing, or have i not pooped enough
I am sick of my sphincter of oddi flaring when I get constipated, or eat the wrong thing.
I am sick of looking like s**t on the school run where I can feel the principal and the other parents look at me, in the same clothes, white face, massive bags under eyes
I am over having to fast so we can travel (in case i take too much poop medicine...)- it a tricky balance...
I am over having to think about poop. My son is just out of nappies, and now its my poop I am having to work around!
I am so over discussing my digestive system with my husband. Between the gyne stuff and his recent eye surgery, the poop issues and the covid everyone at home schooling joy/stress... But the poop discussions don't help.
I am over the waiting, and the being in limbo. ( although I am sure many people around the world are dealing with this with the covid situation.)
I am soooooo over the body problem whack a mole

So anyway this is me saying hi again. I still wonder if IBD is on the cards. The gyne found adhesions during the surgery, which is interesting, added to the ongoing pancreas issues, the constipation and a few ulcers found during one ERCP two years ago - I think it is on the table again, along with the dreaded IBS. If its OK with you guys I need to hang out here for a while. You are all so kind, you listen, offer useful suggestions and don't judge people on their pooping. ( or mind discussing it) Which is what I need right now. Unfortunately.

So yup - any constipation tips? happy to answer questions.
I have tried: more exercise, more water, more fibre, less fibre, various medications.
I gave up on being 'fixed' a long time ago - I would just like to be a bit less broken, and regret taking pooping for granted:(


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