• Welcome to Crohn's Forum, a support group for people with all forms of IBD. While this community is not a substitute for doctor's advice and we cannot treat or diagnose, we find being able to communicate with others who have IBD is invaluable as we navigate our struggles and celebrate our successes. We invite you to join us.

Being mistreated by family

My mom thinks I should be able to stay awake all day and only sleep in the night. But she doesn't understand why I am so tired during this flare up! I was in the hospital for 9 days because of this flare up and put on meds that doesn't even cover the flare up and I just had a nevre block done yesterday to help with the pain and right now all I feel like doing is throwing up and sleeping. And she told me to is my relaxing day where I can sleep or whatever to feel better but I guess she forget she said that a few hours a go. She blames everything on me and says mean stuff to me! Such as she doesn't want to see my face and that she might put me in a nursing home! That's just a few things that is going on today. I wish she would stay happy all the time and try to talk to me about things instead of yelling at me and complaining and trying to drop hints to me!

I guess I want to know is it normal to sleep during the day like take naps
 
Emily, do you think your Mum has depression? I am wondering if she maybe needs to see the Doctor for her own mental health as she doesn't seem to be coping very well!

I really hope you get the rest you need.. Sending (((hugs))) xxx
 
Hugs

Most often the ones with "mental issues" try to make people feel the way they do.

YES this dreaded disease can make you sleep a lot.
My girl is only four and was sleeping up to 16 hours a day.

Your 19 now. Such a young age but you might have to be the one to push the docs for answers. This is your health and flares will come and go but there not suppose to be life long.

What meds are you on. That's a place to start. Knowledge is power. Lean about what you have and different ways to treat it. Then you can be able to talk to your doctors about treaments and your medications.

Hugs again
 
I agree with FW.

Knowledge is power. Your Mum has her own issues, and is probably taking things unfairly out on you. She won't realise she is doing this.

It's tough, take what she says with a pinch of salt and I guess you have to be the strong one.

You have lots of support and knowledge on here. Do you have any close friends who can come with you for moral support to appointments?
 

rygon

Moderator
Have you had your vit B12, ferritin (iron) and Vit D levels checked recently. All of these can make you tired if low. They dont have to be low enough for the docs to be worried to have an effect, I find if any of mine drop I do feel really tired.
 
Okay, do you have an IBD nurse you can talk to? I know that a lot of the nurses over here who support people with IBD will sit in on appointments. Maybe you could e-mail or call them??
 
Your vitamin levels can affect every aspect of you life and disease.
Talk to you GI and or his nurse about getting those levels up.
 
Your mom is being abusive. Telling a 19 year old she's going to put you in a nursing home?! If I told my son such a thing, he might kill himself. I'm his main source of support right now (as a parent should be). Please know it's her, NOT you. If my son feels like taking a nap, he takes one. He usually doesn't, but he sleeps 10 - 12 hours every night. You deserve better from your mom! Maybe you could get the doctor to talk to her???
 

PsychoJane

Moderator
Emily, I will let you weight the words of what I will say. You are the one living the situation and being able to judge of the pertaining of the following. Crohn is often a disease that is co-evolving with the state of minds. For many of us, stressful event or event where we feel like we are not empowered to take action on can mean that the physical condition gets worst on that same time. The same goes with people doing repetitive migraine when under a lot of stress and so on. Life sometimes act that way, it tells you you are having too much by clinical physical evidence. Sometimes, crohn get much better once you get rid of situations that keeps you buried within yourself... If you feel trapped in that, maybe it is time to take some distance if that is an option. Do you have family members or friends where you could go for a little while and avoid being taxed psychologically regarding your condition? Even for a week or two? Take some distance and get a break. Maybe this would help her being better on her side too?

In quebec french, colon is used as a slang word that refers to a person really simple or stupid. My mom use to say that "She left her colon to save hers!". Well she broke up with that person, went on her own and has been able to take control on her CD there after (with medication and all) for the fact she carried less stress...

Think about it.
 
Your mom is being abusive. Telling a 19 year old she's going to put you in a nursing home?! If I told my son such a thing, he might kill himself. I'm his main source of support right now (as a parent should be). Please know it's her, NOT you. If my son feels like taking a nap, he takes one. He usually doesn't, but he sleeps 10 - 12 hours every night. You deserve better from your mom! Maybe you could get the doctor to talk to her???
never really thought of it like that. i just always thought she was being mean but now that its pointed out to me she is being abusive. and she doesnt let me take naps since she cant. she is going to my GI appt next month so hopefully that opens up her freaking mind and her eyes.
 
Emily, I will let you weight the words of what I will say. You are the one living the situation and being able to judge of the pertaining of the following. Crohn is often a disease that is co-evolving with the state of minds. For many of us, stressful event or event where we feel like we are not empowered to take action on can mean that the physical condition gets worst on that same time. The same goes with people doing repetitive migraine when under a lot of stress and so on. Life sometimes act that way, it tells you you are having too much by clinical physical evidence. Sometimes, crohn get much better once you get rid of situations that keeps you buried within yourself... If you feel trapped in that, maybe it is time to take some distance if that is an option. Do you have family members or friends where you could go for a little while and avoid being taxed psychologically regarding your condition? Even for a week or two? Take some distance and get a break. Maybe this would help her being better on her side too?

In quebec french, colon is used as a slang word that refers to a person really simple or stupid. My mom use to say that "She left her colon to save hers!". Well she broke up with that person, went on her own and has been able to take control on her CD there after (with medication and all) for the fact she carried less stress...

Think about it.
thanks soo much that really helped a lot. and i dont have anywhere to go for a week or even a day let alone. i know she is the stresser in my life. i even told her that and she said good. most of my flare are from her stressing me out.
 
Your mom may need medication. My mother has had depression and anxiety disorders for most of my life, and I realize I have to limit my expectations of how much support she is able to provide, emotional and otherwise.

That being said, I do believe she is being abusive and I wonder if that is aggravating your symptoms. I agree with psychojane, a stressful home environment definitely will make Crohn's ( and lots of other diseases) flare up even more-I know it does for me. We're all here for you. Sending hugs.:hug::hug:
 
Your mom may need medication. My mother has had depression and anxiety disorders for most of my life, and I realize I have to limit my expectations of how much support she is able to provide, emotional and otherwise.

That being said, I do believe she is being abusive and I wonder if that is aggravating your symptoms. I agree with psychojane, a stressful home environment definitely will make Crohn's ( and lots of other diseases) flare up even more-I know it does for me. We're all here for you. Sending hugs.:hug::hug:
She's on them but they don't work I think and it does make my Crohns worse and thanks!
 
Top