I, too, was given the option Stoma or Die! This was after years of non-diagnosis and then more years of resisting the idea of a stoma, while struggling with Crohn's and numerous surgeries for blockages, twisted bowels, fistulas...and loss of weight, embarrassing accidents, crippling pain and all the other life enriching aspects of this disease!!
Because I had left too long, my proctocolectomy operation had to remove a large amount of diseased tissue and so it took quite a while to heal but it did heal very cleanly.
As Tubes says, a stoma is not ideal but, for me, way, way preferable to life without it. It can take a while to find the right equipment (I hate the word "appliance" for a stoma bag - it sounds though I have a refrigerator or at least an electric mixer hanging off my stomach!). You should be allocated a stoma nurse and she/he will help you what suits you best. The companies that supply ostomy bags and all associated paraphernalia are very good at sending you samples (see the 'sticky' at the beginning of the Stoma sub-forum). I have just changed to Coloplast Sensura Mio bags and am finding them very good.
And since I have had my stoma I have done so many things that I wouldn't have attempted beforehand. I have just returned from my third trip to Japan and have had no problems in the communal hot baths, where you have to be naked. I have snorkelled in the Galapagos, been to Machu Pichu and Lake Titicaca in Peru, spent four days fishing off the coast of Western Australia and lots more. I have had 'accidents' with my stoma bag leaking (one on the top of the Island of the Sun in Lake Titicaca) but the positives far outweigh the negatives
Please ask any questions at all. Everyone is here to help.