Favourite sayings or quotes

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“Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.”
 
It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you: the one to slander you, and the other to get the news to you.
Mark Twain
 
Sometimes this life can get you down
It's so confusing
There's so many rules to follow
And I feel it 'Cause I just run away in my mind

Savage Garden - "The Animal Song"
 
In order to make a man or a boy covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to obtain.

MARK TWAIN
 
Never argue with stupid people. They will drag you down to their level, and then beat you with experience.
~Mark Twain
 
Often the difference between a successful marriage and a mediocre one consists of leaving about three or four things a day unsaid. ~ Anonymous
 
"People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But people will never forget how you made them feel."
 
lisakuney said:
Wish in one hand and shit in the other, and see which one fills up first.
Click to expand...

One of my FAVORITE sayings that my mother still slaps my hands over (I'm 46).

Never trust a fart- Jack Nicolson (forget the movie)

You can't change the past but can ruin the present by worrying about the future.
 
A friend will calm you down when you are angry but a best friend will run beside you while you carry the baseball bat singing "Someone's gonna get it!"

I have one nerve left and you are standing on it!
 
Such an unfair world. When a man talks dirty to a woman its considered sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man its £2.50/min (charges may vary).
 
also,when men watch female strippers they mostly have serious,thoughtful expressions on their faces,but when women watch male strippers the hilarity is deafening.Says it all really.
 
A good man can make you feel sexy, strong and able to take on the world…Ohh sorry that’s wine…. wine does that.
 
If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them.
 
"That was then----------and now is now---''


(forget the past go with the present)
 
“If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you.” ― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
 
“If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together... there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart... I'll always be with you.” ― A.A. Milne

Oh I cried so much in this book lol!
 
Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh?" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's hand. "I just wanted to be sure of you.” ― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
 
"Absence diminishes mediocre passions and increases great ones, as the wind extinguishes candles and fans fires."


"People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within."
--Elizabeth Kubler Ross


"Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad"


Women are all born angels, and when someone breaks our wings we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick...Be warned~

Lol!
 
When you go into court you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people that weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.
 
Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender that is strength. :)
 
The only acceptable time to say "I have diarrhea" is when playing scrabble....and that's because its worth a shit ton of points" -Zach Galafinakis
 
letting things go in one ear and out the other is bad enough, but its worse when things go in one ear, get all mixed up and come out of the mouth.
 
Life is filled with unanswered questions, but it is the courage to seek those answers That continues to give meaning to life. You can spend your life wallowing in despair, wondering why you were the one who was lead to the road strewn with pain, or you can be grateful That you are strong enough to survive it. :)
 
Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.

Homer Simpson
 
Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic.
 
"People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel" ~ Maya Angelou
 
@defgurl2004-Your avatar alone deserves a hug, I cracked up when I saw it! Someone, please make this into a T-shirt!:rof:
 

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