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Fertility Issues - Please help!

Hi there,

I am new to this site and am looking for some help understanding. I couldn't figure out how to create my own question forum, so if this isn't allowed here I'm sorry and I would appreciate someone explaining to me how I can do this. My partner has crohn's and we are having trouble conceiving. We have been trying for 10 months now with no luck. I have heard that crohn's disease can lower a male's sperm count. Unfortunately my partner and I seem to be at odds over this. He refuses to get checked out. We both want kids, and sometimes he says he will make a doctors appointment, but never actually does. Every month when I find out it didn't happen, I'm crushed. It's getting to the point where I don't even believe him any more when he says he will. I understand that men can be sensitive to any fertility issues, but I honestly don't know what to say anymore. I was hoping that if there are any other males on this site who are going through the same thing, that maybe they could give me some insight as to why he is just closing up on something we both want. Also, if anyone else has overcome this issue -how did you do it? Is there anything else we could try that isn't a doctors? Different vitamins, something, anything?

Thank you in advance.

Warmly,

Baker Girl
 

DJW

Forum Monitor
Hi Baker Girl. I want to say hi and welcome to the forum. I'm of no help with your situation. I'm sure someone who can help will be along.

Sending both of you my support.
 
Hi
I've just joined the forum myself and similarly my partner and I are trying to conceive. He also avoids difficult doctors appointments and sometimes I have found he knows he needs to go he just has to get his head round it. We are very close as I'm sure you are and I have found honest discussions about how his reluctance is making you feel makes the situation easier and helps it to come to a resolution. It must be frustrating you I know every month those last few days before my period I find it hard to focus, anxiety creeps in purely out of hope only to have them crushed once again. We just have to stay positive and stay supportive so they feel that no matter the outcome we still love them. I suppose i'm trying to say (in a very long winded way) that maybe he can cope with knowing fertility may be an issue but the thought of actually being told he can't provided you with a child is too much to bare. I know this is how my partner felt but we are working through it.

Lisa x
 
I'm very sorry you are dealing with this. My husband and I tried for over a year to conceive our daughter, so I understand how frustrating and heartbreaking it is. I know there is a supplement that some people use called FertilAid. There is a formulation specifically for men that is supposed to help with sperm count. I hope you will be able to get some answers soon.
 
Thank you so much everyone. I just researched FertilAid and purchased some :)

I really appreciate all your kind words of support and especially the recommendation of this supplement. My partner and I will continue to speak about this issue but he isn't the type of man to voice his emotions easily. It is enough for me to know we are not alone in this and that I can offer him something different to try.

Again thank you so much.

Warmly,

Baker Girl
 
I am a male with CD and have one child after several years of us having challenges getting pregnant, staying pregnant, etc. I understand where you are coming from, it is very challenging to go through, regardless of any challenges CD may add along the way.

There is a lot more at play with fertility than just sperm count and CD. While it is important to have it checked, it's not necessarily the only issue that may be at play. My recommendation is that if you decide together that you want to do more than just keep trying the old fashioned way, that you have your GP recommend a fertility specialist that you can both go visit together. They will be able to help with everything you need to know and/or try to improve your chances. Testing sperm count will certainly be on the list, but there are lots of other things that can help you both. What's important is that neither of you go into this with any consideration to "whose fault" it is. That may be why is putting off getting the test - aside from being somewhat emasculating to have a low count, it's more likely that he's scared to learn it's his fault. It's just something that you need to pursue together to make it happen, and all the things you both do will help contribute - diet, exercise, drugs, cycle monitoring, etc..

For us it took a lot of things - several tries at insemination, in vitro, etc., but is different for everyone. I don't think CD really had any impact for us, and we both tested OK on everything, but sometimes it just doesn't work the way it should. It is very intimidating to go through, and can become a very clinical and expensive process, but I wish we started down the right path sooner and didn't waste so much time trying to do it without any help.

Best of luck however you approach it. I would also recommend spending some time on fertility forms to do some research, as you will get a lot more expertise on the issue.
 
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