A
Anonymous User
Guest
Hey everyone,
I'm dealing with a situation where my youngest nephew who is twelve has been sexually assaulted by two of his brothers over an 8 year period. The eldest boy pleaded guilty last year and got a good behaviour bond and the younger boy is getting off with nothing because the family don't believe our young nephew. We've been battling to remain involved through the court process, through Department of Human Services child protection workers and through all of this we are and have always been vilified because we stood up for the rights of the child and didn't support the parent.
I know this isn't technically crohns related but the stress of this is giving me such a lot of grief and we have lost every member of our extended family over this now. We've tried to protect these children for the past 20 years and now even the children have been turned from us because of the campaign of hate from the adults who don't see anything wrong in what's happened.
Every professional person I talk to in the field is horrified by what is happening and what has been allowed to happen, yet we are the ones being ostracised. I'm having a hard time, and even though I want to fight and remain connected to these children I don't know how to.
They've been brought up with no boundaries, no structure and no discipline so they have no regard for anyone but themselves. The youngest is different because he's gotten counselling for the past two years but I'm sure that if allowed to stay in the family environment he will suffer more harm. We had one of his brothers living with us last year and when he came to us he wasn't eating, when his mother removed him from our care to take him home again against the wishes of the department, he stopped eating again. We live too far away to be in casual contact and their mother is stopping all correspondance via post or email.
I'm really torn here. These kids don't have a chance, and I'm seriously considering just letting go, stepping back and just letting them know that I'm here if they need me in the future. All this fighting is causing my crohns to flare, I'm constantly fatigued, it's financially draining and I need to protect my own sanity and emotional state of mind, never mind that my husband has stood by me and in the process lost his entire family.
The eldest boy is 21 now and has turned into a nasty, narcissistic sadist who at 18 tortured and killed a kitten with his girlfriend who is now his wife. At 12 he punched his stepsister in the face with his fist.
His younger 14 year old brother assaulted the youngest boy as payback for his disclosure against the eldest boy, and even though the eldest pleaded guilty their mother and extended family have refused to believe that he is telling the truth, even though he's admitted it to me, the department and counsellor know he's done it and state in writing that he is a continuing threat to the youngest boy.
Would I do it again? In a heartbeat.
I'm sorry guys, I'm in a place that isn't so sociable at the moment and up until mikey posted the anonymous posting info I had no way of talking about this.
I don't know what I'm going to do. I've tried staying connected but that's not working. These kids have grown up with no conscience and I doubt whether we'll ever hear from them again. It doesn't bother me except for the youngest boy.
Well...has this been a rant. It's been good to be able to offload this to others who while you might not know the details can understand the effect it has with crohns.
If I'm not terriby coherent here, please accept my apologies.
We've got another court session tomorrow which we are not going to as it is a 6 hour return trip and I just don't have it in me this time, after going to 6 sessions I'm a bit worn out, not to mention frustrated.
Thanks for listening everyone, it's been a hell of a trip. I'm hoping to get off this train soon.
Cheers
I'm dealing with a situation where my youngest nephew who is twelve has been sexually assaulted by two of his brothers over an 8 year period. The eldest boy pleaded guilty last year and got a good behaviour bond and the younger boy is getting off with nothing because the family don't believe our young nephew. We've been battling to remain involved through the court process, through Department of Human Services child protection workers and through all of this we are and have always been vilified because we stood up for the rights of the child and didn't support the parent.
I know this isn't technically crohns related but the stress of this is giving me such a lot of grief and we have lost every member of our extended family over this now. We've tried to protect these children for the past 20 years and now even the children have been turned from us because of the campaign of hate from the adults who don't see anything wrong in what's happened.
Every professional person I talk to in the field is horrified by what is happening and what has been allowed to happen, yet we are the ones being ostracised. I'm having a hard time, and even though I want to fight and remain connected to these children I don't know how to.
They've been brought up with no boundaries, no structure and no discipline so they have no regard for anyone but themselves. The youngest is different because he's gotten counselling for the past two years but I'm sure that if allowed to stay in the family environment he will suffer more harm. We had one of his brothers living with us last year and when he came to us he wasn't eating, when his mother removed him from our care to take him home again against the wishes of the department, he stopped eating again. We live too far away to be in casual contact and their mother is stopping all correspondance via post or email.
I'm really torn here. These kids don't have a chance, and I'm seriously considering just letting go, stepping back and just letting them know that I'm here if they need me in the future. All this fighting is causing my crohns to flare, I'm constantly fatigued, it's financially draining and I need to protect my own sanity and emotional state of mind, never mind that my husband has stood by me and in the process lost his entire family.
The eldest boy is 21 now and has turned into a nasty, narcissistic sadist who at 18 tortured and killed a kitten with his girlfriend who is now his wife. At 12 he punched his stepsister in the face with his fist.
His younger 14 year old brother assaulted the youngest boy as payback for his disclosure against the eldest boy, and even though the eldest pleaded guilty their mother and extended family have refused to believe that he is telling the truth, even though he's admitted it to me, the department and counsellor know he's done it and state in writing that he is a continuing threat to the youngest boy.
Would I do it again? In a heartbeat.
I'm sorry guys, I'm in a place that isn't so sociable at the moment and up until mikey posted the anonymous posting info I had no way of talking about this.
I don't know what I'm going to do. I've tried staying connected but that's not working. These kids have grown up with no conscience and I doubt whether we'll ever hear from them again. It doesn't bother me except for the youngest boy.
Well...has this been a rant. It's been good to be able to offload this to others who while you might not know the details can understand the effect it has with crohns.
If I'm not terriby coherent here, please accept my apologies.
We've got another court session tomorrow which we are not going to as it is a 6 hour return trip and I just don't have it in me this time, after going to 6 sessions I'm a bit worn out, not to mention frustrated.
Thanks for listening everyone, it's been a hell of a trip. I'm hoping to get off this train soon.
Cheers