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Its been awhile

mwb3779

Kitchenhawk
Hi, I wanted to introduce myself again. Its been a awhile since I've read or posted on here. I've gone through a whole lot emotionally that I didn't think I would get through. I'm getting to that point now and wanted to come in and say I miss you guys. Its been a couple months. A lot of thoughts and prayers and it looks like I'll be moving home soon. I can not wait.

For those of you who don't know me or my story. Here it is. I was working in Seattle as a territory manager for a large company that gave me the Seattle/ Tacoma area. I worked there for 4 years and was loving it. Last year around June I started to to really feel horrible and I couldn't figure it out. I took a leave of absence from work and got worse. I thought it was a depression or something from all the economy issues. It got even worse, and I stopped eating cause I could not keep anything down or have it be anything other than D. It got so bad that I slept 20 or more hours a day and if I was lucky 300 cal. I lost a considerable amount of weight (100 lbs in just under 2 months). I got sicker. Doctors could not figure out where all my pain was coming from. It was bad! Very bad! So I just basically just shut down. One night while heading to the bathroom, I fell over. I just stopped functioning. I lost control of my bowels. It was humiliating, I was living with my sister and her family at the time. Talk about feeling bad. My sister and her husband cleaned up. She is a great sister and brother-in-law, I love them so very much! She was scared for me and rushed me to the hospital. This was Oct 29th. They couldn't figure out what was wrong either. I kept getting worse. They admitted me, and I was put into isolation. Fearing I was contagious. Scary. I spent almost two weeks in the hospital. I had the best pain meds and sometimes they didn't touch the pain. After a colonoscopy and biopsy it came back I had Crohn's disease. I was terrified. I thought it was over. Here I am 30 and losing everything. I had lost my car through repo (no money for the bills), lost my place to live, eventually lost my job cause I couldn't work anymore. I hated everything. My dad came out from Maryland while I was in the hospital and asked me to live with my mom and dad for a while until I got better. I moved in with them in mid Nov last year. I moved away from everything. No insurance, no health, no anything other than the love of my parents.

I fell in love in January of this year with a girl who used to work for me. KNown her for 2 years already, things seemed to be going well. I was feeling better. Its amazing what be in love can do for the system. She was healing me!! I went out to visit her and spent two weeks there. I thought everything was great. Turns out she wasn't the person I thought she was and I think my illness scared her more than anything. She helped me refill my pill box, which is still frightening. I take so many medicines and I'm only 31 now. I can compare with my Grandma's pill box! There's something wrong there. Well this is the time when I stopped coming around. I have a few friends on here that stayed in communication with me and for that I am grateful. Sue is such a wonderful person. She lives across the world from me and listened to me so many times about how a lone I felt and how much I missed my girl. Cris and all my facebook Crohnies have kept me abreast of stuff in their lives.

Fast forward to a couple weeks ago. I realize that I still have no insurance and no real way of caring for myself yet. But I am starting to also realize that I am a strong person who will come back. Someone who is gonna make a difference. I am going to be moving home to Washington state soon and will be starting over. A year ago, I was a manager in charge of a major metro area of stores. A year later, I live in my parents house with nothing. Things change so much. But they will not keep me down for much longer. A song that has been playing in my head so much in the past couple weeks is the Black Eyed Peas "I gotta a feeling". If you've never heard it please listen to it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uSD4vsh1zDA

Thank you to all of you who prays for me and all those who still struggle I pray for you and your families. Remember we are all a powerful force, a cure is coming. I can feel it. I gotta feeling, tonight's gonna be a good night.
 
Good to 'hear' from you again Mike. I've wondered how you are and keep meaning to message you on FB. So glad to hear you are in a positive headspace!

Hugs

Shaz
 

DustyKat

Super Moderator
Wow, what a journey you've had. So glad to hear that it is finally ending and on a positive note too!

Good luck and best wishes with the move and the new beginning.
 

Dexky

To save time...Ask Dusty!
Location
Kentucky
I guess I'm just getting old. I can't imagine anything from the Black Eyed Peas being uplifting. Now Patti Griffin's "Up to the Mountain", that's uplifting. Hope it's all turning around for you Mike.
 

Nyx

Moderator
Welcome back Mike...glad to hear you're feeling better and getting on with things! Hope to keep hearing from you :)
 
Hey Mike - That's quite a story. I think it's great you've managed to come around to such a positive attitude. What an inspiration!
 

Crohn's 35

Inactive Account
Welcome back Mike, I wondered where you got to! I admire your courage and fight, I know what it is all about. I had a similar situation but had a 4 year old to look after too. This disease will be cured and soon, I have a gut feeling as well. I have to, been too many years without no sign of remission. I am lucky to have a wonderful husband to support me and someday your princess will come and she will support you no matter what. It is rare and hard to find one that is really and truly there for you. I am glad you are back, you have been a wonderful person to help others. I too am not on near as much, winters are long and have alot to do and enjoying the outdoors.

Take care, thanks for sharing your story, and try not to disappear again, ya hear?!

Hugs, Penny
 
Welcome back, Mike! I never got to know you that well before you left, but knew you were going through some rough times. Thanks for sharing that with us :)

I'm so glad to hear you've developed a more positive outlook on life again. That is great! I hope to see you around the boards more often! :)
 
Mike, I am still relatively new here, but your story is such a journey. You really sound like you have been through so much, but it seems you are stronger for it! Good luck on getting back to Washington. :)
 
Brother Mike, I like your attitude. I knew you would make it back and will continue to climb. We all hit a low spot at one point or another. Just a matter of time and how low you allow yourself to go. You have went as low as your going to go and now your on your way to the top again.

Anytime you need to talk you just pm me here or FB. I'll be there for you buddy.
 
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