Hello everyone! I'm new here, I've joined because I need to talk to someone who understands what we are going through My husband was diagnosed with Crohn's about 5 and a half years ago. The first year was rough but then he has put on Humira and for for years we had almost no symptoms at all. We've always been extremely active, very outdoorsy, we LOVE to eat (so when he was first diagnosed we had to change some habits), we don't drink, we don't smoke...so before Crohn's we were just a happy healthy couple. We got married one year before he was diagnosed. Ummmm, so I got pregnant last year and when our baby was 4 months old I traveled to Mexico (I'm Mexican, my husband is Spanish, we live in Barcelona) for a month, just the baby and myself because hubby had to work. When I came back I was horrified, my husband had lost a ridiculous amount of weight and he was looking very sick, he was in some sort of denial about it and he hid it from me while I was in Mexico. As soon as I got to Spain I urged him to go to his doctor. Long story short, that was last October...since then our life has been an uphill battle... he's lost 25kg, he got perianal abscess, a fistula, then a fistulectomy...they doubled his dosage of Humira. So it's been almost 7 months of him being with this severe flare up and while I think of ourselves as strong it's starting to take a toll on me. I've had to raise our baby by myself (he's almost 9 m.o) while I take care of my husband too...he stopped working about 5 months ago and I had to quit because he obvs couldn't look after our child. So I do all the housework, take care of our baby and take care of him (he still has a open wound from the fistulectomy). He has a lot of accidents and there's a lot of clean up to do. My in laws come every couple of days to help me out a bit. I'm SO SO worried about my husband because I can literally see him fading away. He doesn't want to talk to anyone, he barely talks to our baby, he snaps at me for the littlest things...he's isolating himself. We haven't been intimate in I don't know how long...
I'm a psychologist...I truly understand that he's going through a LOT and I've begged him to go to counseling or therapy, by himself or together...but he's completely refusing. I'm a strong woman and I'm doing EVERYTHING I can to remain positive and to keep up doing everything for my family but it's like talking to a wall...he won't let me in, I've tried everything. And I feel horrible for saying it but sometimes I wish I could just get away with my baby...I'm SO happy and SO miserable at the same time. I'm going to stand by my husband no matter what and will always support him. I guess I'm just trying to look for some words of encouragement from people that understand how this disease changes your life and everyone else's around you. Thank you...if you read all of this!!
I'm a psychologist...I truly understand that he's going through a LOT and I've begged him to go to counseling or therapy, by himself or together...but he's completely refusing. I'm a strong woman and I'm doing EVERYTHING I can to remain positive and to keep up doing everything for my family but it's like talking to a wall...he won't let me in, I've tried everything. And I feel horrible for saying it but sometimes I wish I could just get away with my baby...I'm SO happy and SO miserable at the same time. I'm going to stand by my husband no matter what and will always support him. I guess I'm just trying to look for some words of encouragement from people that understand how this disease changes your life and everyone else's around you. Thank you...if you read all of this!!