• Welcome to Crohn's Forum, a support group for people with all forms of IBD. While this community is not a substitute for doctor's advice and we cannot treat or diagnose, we find being able to communicate with others who have IBD is invaluable as we navigate our struggles and celebrate our successes. We invite you to join us.

New to the depression

After having my second child almost 8 years ago I have been plagued by the D everyday. I have collagenous colitis, a little different than most of you. I have been all sorts of medications, I am currently tapering off of pred, down to 5mg a day right now one more week to go. I go back to the GI on the 11th of Dec. they are thinking Imuran, did by blood test so now I am just waiting. I am scared most of the time because someone with my condition in particular should have gotten better after the entocort I took for a year straight. Imuran is thought to be the last line of defense, and I am just scared as he** what if it doesn't work? The GI doc has already told me it is this drug or deal with my current symptoms. who can just come to the realization that I am going to live the rest of my life feeling like crap, like i have no choice but to wake up and accept the fact that I have to go on in this life everyday feeling like I have food poisoning, as to this is what my disease does to me. No it's not going to kill me, nor does it increase my chances for cancer. Is that seriosly suppose to make me feel better, So I have to look forward to living a very long dreadful life. Most days I don't want to get out of bed, and if it weren't for my 2 children who need me to take care of them, I don't think I would get out of bed and face this pain. It has taken me away from my life, and when I look in the mirror, which I now avoid I don't see me, I see a stranger.
It's really hard isn't it? Being a mom and having people relying on you all the time makes it even harder ((((hugs)))) to you. There are lots of us who feel your pain.
I would suggest a second opinion or different GI altogether. There are more treatments out there than just Imuran and Entocort, and unfortunately these stupid diseases often take several tries at therapies to get the right one.
Inflammation in the body can also increase feelings of anxiety and depression, so it's not just a situational thing, it's an actual physiological thing. There are lots of good antidepressants and anti-anxiety drugs out there.
Sending lots of HUGS your way!!

Having struglled with depression several times in my life, I can only say to take it one day at a time. Just remind yourself - I only have to get through today. Try not to think of what the future will bring as it can get too overwhelming making the depression harder to deal with.

Consider taking an anti depressant, I have never regretted the times when I chose to do so.

I would also seek out a second opinion - even if the info ends up being the same - as that will help you feel like you are doing something to take control of you condition and that you are managing it and not that it is managing you.