mwb3779
Kitchenhawk
Its been too long since I've posted anything on here. I'm laying here in bed after another night with no sleep.
Here's an update
My "insurance" I did have stopped as of 12/31/10. The reason given to me in March 0f 2011, the underwriter that was carrying me dropped everyone. The BEST part? No one told me anything. Until I got a call from a doctor trying to get insurance info from the company who said that I should call them. Fabulous right? The only good news? My GI wrote off my last colonoscopy. The findings? After a year of heavy pred use my Crohn's has mostly healed. Yea! The bad news? I can't afford the 6mp at the dose I need to take anymore so now I am on Imuran. Can't afford the Asacol anymore so I had to stop taking that all together. Now for the past few weeks I've been up at nights dealing with a gut that won't shut up, won't leave me be and endless nights of bathroom trips.
I swear I want to just start drinking it all away. But if I do that? The meds I take could severely react with it. I drank rum tonight. Didn't take my meds though. I'm just getting more tired. One thing that has been missing has been my friends from here that at least understand what I have to go through. I catch up with some on facebook but even then it sucks. I at least returned to church last Sunday on Easter. That was nice.
I've been out of the loop now with my friends for so long because I had to move home, I feel even worse. No job, No money, and I live with my folks. Nothing like being 32 and living with mom and dad. :frown: I get to the point of saying you know I'm feeling better and some how I always get trapped again. I've been eating kinda safely, but still I miss so much. I gained so much weight with the damn prednisone, nothing I do seems to help. I eat once a day when I feel like eating and then I don't eat for a day, then I eat all day. Its like my system is so screwed up that when I try to fix it, something else breaks.
I miss being normal. I mean at my last job I was a territory manager. I ran the Tacoma/ Seattle market. District managers reported to me. I worked 12 hour days and loved it! Now I'm reduced to looking for something part time because I don't know how my butt will handle it. I can't do the traveling anymore. I had done virtually the same thing for the past 12 years. I haven't worked in almost two years. Good days are great. Bad days turn into weeks.
Thanks for the vent. Even though I'm probably a stranger to most of you on here now.
Here's an update
My "insurance" I did have stopped as of 12/31/10. The reason given to me in March 0f 2011, the underwriter that was carrying me dropped everyone. The BEST part? No one told me anything. Until I got a call from a doctor trying to get insurance info from the company who said that I should call them. Fabulous right? The only good news? My GI wrote off my last colonoscopy. The findings? After a year of heavy pred use my Crohn's has mostly healed. Yea! The bad news? I can't afford the 6mp at the dose I need to take anymore so now I am on Imuran. Can't afford the Asacol anymore so I had to stop taking that all together. Now for the past few weeks I've been up at nights dealing with a gut that won't shut up, won't leave me be and endless nights of bathroom trips.
I swear I want to just start drinking it all away. But if I do that? The meds I take could severely react with it. I drank rum tonight. Didn't take my meds though. I'm just getting more tired. One thing that has been missing has been my friends from here that at least understand what I have to go through. I catch up with some on facebook but even then it sucks. I at least returned to church last Sunday on Easter. That was nice.
I've been out of the loop now with my friends for so long because I had to move home, I feel even worse. No job, No money, and I live with my folks. Nothing like being 32 and living with mom and dad. :frown: I get to the point of saying you know I'm feeling better and some how I always get trapped again. I've been eating kinda safely, but still I miss so much. I gained so much weight with the damn prednisone, nothing I do seems to help. I eat once a day when I feel like eating and then I don't eat for a day, then I eat all day. Its like my system is so screwed up that when I try to fix it, something else breaks.
I miss being normal. I mean at my last job I was a territory manager. I ran the Tacoma/ Seattle market. District managers reported to me. I worked 12 hour days and loved it! Now I'm reduced to looking for something part time because I don't know how my butt will handle it. I can't do the traveling anymore. I had done virtually the same thing for the past 12 years. I haven't worked in almost two years. Good days are great. Bad days turn into weeks.
Thanks for the vent. Even though I'm probably a stranger to most of you on here now.