I'm 23 years old. I got a temporary illeostomy - I should have my reversal in the few weeks. - not all a permanent - back in December. It was my worst nightmare and my parents too.
However, it's put me into remission after 2 and a half years of very active Crohns which is all I really wanted. I couldn't continue living the way I was with such active Crohns and it's given me a new lease of life.
As pointyears has said, they have come on leaps and bounds. There are loads of different types of bags so if the first bag doesn't work as such, there's always another one to try. For me it was like going to a shoe shop, all the different types out there. None of my friends would know I had it, and when I have told people that don't really know me, there first response is always; 'but i'd never would have guessed/known,' so there isn't a smell or anything.
I can lead a normal, active life; unlike before. I go to the gym, go on holiday, socialise with my friends, and I can wear fashionable clothes. Admittedly I have just brought stoma control pants, which helps flatten it out so I can wear dresses and skirts without my own perceived notion that people can tell what I have underneath it. There's lot of companies online - having just checked out myself yesterday that do that sort of thing.
I can't really say much else that others haven't! I would possibly suggest googling ostomy blogs; there are quite a few out there, and I found that some of them helped me, it also shows your daughter wouldn't be alone!
I hope your daughter gets better soon, and this forum is really an awesome place!