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Sticky You Are Not A Burden!!!

Easier said than done not to feel guilty. Missing family events. Missing brotherhood events. Missing classes. Barely being able to eat. In pain all the time and resorting to basically laying in bed most of the day because it's easier than sitting up and putting stress on the muscles over the intestines.
 
Dusty. That initial post was Divine, thank you!!

I love my job but was asked to take a leave of absence. I suppose I just couldn't hide it anymore. I've had Crohn's for 15 years and have always been able to "pull it off" as far as family and work. Until now. I'm scheduled for an illeostomy and can't help but think in the back of my mind it's like a blood offering to appease the gods. Anyway, thank you.
 

DustyKat

Super Moderator
I am so sorry to hear that it has come to needing surgery. :ghug:

I hope all goes well and leaves you feeling much better than you are now. Good luck!

Dusty. xxx
 
I've never read this before, but since my recent bout in hospital and surgery, I always felt like a nuisance. One day my aunt told me, "the only one who thinks you're a nuisance is you!" I learned how loved and supported I was!

Thank you Dusty! Your children are blessed to have a mother like you!
 
Hey, Dusty, so I am new to this site and freshly diagnosed with Crohn's, I'm 21 years old.

I am having a bit of trouble trying to get my mum engaged with my condition, she never seems to want to talk about it but when I do bring something up about Crohn's she is very short......

Am I just over thinking that she dos not want to know or the other thing i am thinking is that she is just as scared as me.
but I would still like her to be my mum and at least try and comfort me about things...

sorry for the waffling.

kind regards,
Kyle
 

DustyKat

Super Moderator
Hi Kyle :ghug: and my apologies for the late reply. :redface:

Your Mum may be feeling a number things hun. Firstly, most definitely scared and secondly she may also be feeling guilty that you have the disease and she doesn’t. Then there are feelings of helplessness and grief. :( As your mum she will go through the same sort of emotions you will which as the sufferer can be doubly difficult for you. :hug:

Please have a read though the grief thread if you haven’t already done so:

http://www.crohnsforum.com/showthread.php?t=22520

Perhaps her not engaging is denial, hoping that it has all been a mistake and it will just go away. Or it could be that she is afraid of breaking down and crying in front of you if she gives into her feelings.

The main thing is, none of the reactions she is having are a reflection on you Kyle, they are response to what is happening to you. I know it doesn’t make it any easier on you for knowing it but things should settle as she comes to terms with it.

Dusty. xxx
 
Wow, thank you for this! I know I am a burden to my dad - he doesn't understand anything I go through - that's why I moved away from him bc he gets mad anytime I am in the hospital or sick.

It's so good to have a place like this to go to where we can all support each other!
I can relate, as I do not have support from any one person in my family or my partner. None of them seem to understand the ordeal it is to live with IBD. I was only diagnosed last year, I'm still very new to Crohn's, and I still don't completely understand it. My parents, my sister, and my partner all seem to look at me like I'm full of shit when I literally can't get up from my bed. It's mind blowing that they actually think I could be "faking" or "exaggerating" symptoms to get sympathy. However mad I feel about the situation, I almost can't blame them, as they just don't understand what IBD really is. I can't even wrap my head around it completely.

The real issue here, is if family members don't understand, how can others understand. I was enrolled as a disabled student in my degree program last year as a result of my Crohn's disease. Inevitably, my professors challenged me on every issue that arose because I "[didn't] look disabled. look completely fine". These are the kind of stigma's that are very real and prevalent. It's hard to find the strength to be successful in life while living with a chronic illness and such a lack of support.
 
I thank you for writing that, it has been on my mind for a week as I grow closure to the rainbow bridge I want to see so bad. I am a burden on my kids, family is non exsistant
 
DustyKat is so sweet. The sweetest ever. Thank you DustyKat. I've never had anyone say all those nice things. My husband takes good care of me but my disease is invisible, no one else can even remotely understand. Anyways, who wants to go around telling people what a day in our life is like? It's not your standard water cooler conversation. I wish I could overcome the enormous resentment I feel for having this disease. I have a difficult time accepting that my body is failing me, attacking itself for no apparent reason. It's beyond me.
 
DustyKat, I just read your initial post and some of the thread here and I am blown away literally - thank you for your words and the kindness. I have always been the caretaker and it has been a difficult transition - one I still haven't quite managed, to become the one requiring care. Next time I'm having a really bad day I will remember those words so again thank you.
 
One thing people have to remember is your family, at least those close to you do understand. After time goes by, they simply don't know what to do and are frustrated, just as much as you and don't express it well.

When you listen to any of their misplaced anger, remember back when you first found out and were having hard times, I'm sure they were very supportive then.

I'm very quiet about what ails me with my family, and friends. But the ones close to me know, and educated themselves more than I did, I always just said its just this, named the issues and left it at that. Told them would be applying for disability. A few came back with "You can't be that bad off" or "Sounds like you're being a baby" and the ones that had educated themselves wailed into them like no tomorrow. I never even said a word. Now seven years later, the story is a little old, they are just tired of the situation, not you. Tired that there's nothing they can do or say that will make it go away, so they have misplaced anger they may even take out on you.
 

DustyKat

Super Moderator
It makes me so sad when I read of what many of you have to deal with from the people you think you can most rely on. :( Some people never do step up to the plate and when it is family it makes it even more heartbreaking.

I know at times I become frustrated, angry and fed up but it is not with the person it is with the disease and I do my utmost to never display it to them.

I also know that I am grieving and I don’t know if I will ever find true acceptance with the hand my kids have been dealt.

Thinking of you guys. :heart:

Dusty. xxx
 
No one gets through life alone, we are here to help each other. Sometimes one needs more, sometimes it's someone else's turn, just take your turn and be glad this bunch is here, I sure am! We do it happily.
 
What I'm currently struggling with right now is the thought that I will not be able to get physically fit enough to pass physical tests for police departments
 
Oh, yeah, that's a biggy. I know they can be tough. It may not be your bag, but it's mine, so if you don't mind, I'll pray for you. Can you re-apply if you aren't the first time? My nephew is a cop and I know it's rigerous. Alll the best, m
 
I'm close to benching 80% of my body weight now. Need to add about 30lbs to it and then get the running down. The running I just need motivation to keep on running once I get tired and want to give up. This time last year I was in the middle of a bad flare. Ended up going down to 100lbs. Which for me was only loosing 45lbs. Then I gained 70 and I'm the heaviest I've ever been. I'm on Humira and pentasa. Thanks to my girlfriend and her parents I put on that 70lbs. I was just skin and bones. Just wish I got on the lifting a little earlier on that weight gain this time. But just didn't have the energy to
 
I can relate, as I do not have support from any one person in my family or my partner. None of them seem to understand the ordeal it is to live with IBD. I was only diagnosed last year, I'm still very new to Crohn's, and I still don't completely understand it. My parents, my sister, and my partner all seem to look at me like I'm full of shit when I literally can't get up from my bed. It's mind blowing that they actually think I could be "faking" or "exaggerating" symptoms to get sympathy. However mad I feel about the situation, I almost can't blame them, as they just don't understand what IBD really is. I can't even wrap my head around it completely.

The real issue here, is if family members don't understand, how can others understand. I was enrolled as a disabled student in my degree program last year as a result of my Crohn's disease. Inevitably, my professors challenged me on every issue that arose because I "[didn't] look disabled. look completely fine". These are the kind of stigma's that are very real and prevalent. It's hard to find the strength to be successful in life while living with a chronic illness and such a lack of support.


Speaking from the side of being the loved one, it can take a long time to finally accept your loved one is ill and it will be a long time before they are "better".

My fiancée was diagnosed 7 years ago and for the first few years I was an awful boyfriend when it came to Crohns. I didn't understand the disease, I didn't understand my fiancées feelings, I didn't understand how it would affect our future. I had been really unfair on her for a few days and really upset her with my lack of compassion when she decided to give me a print out from the Internet that explained more about Crohns. It still took me a while to be the boyfriend I needed to be but that was the day I turned over a new leaf. I started reading up on Crohns a lot more. Im still no expert and I'm not the perfect fiancée but I am a lot more understanding of her feelings, fatigue and chronic pain than I was even 5 years ago.

I know you think that everyone is being really unfair on you, please try and understand that they don't mean to. They don't love you any less. If anything they may be in some sort of denial or think you might wake up one morning and be better. I'm talking from experience. Once the penny drops, they will become much more understanding of how you feel and be much more compassionate. Just give them time.
 
iiilca - have you given your loved ones anything to read or taken them to the doctor with you - perhaps it would help them to understand better. My husband is sympathetic, but he's got Alzheimer's. who knows how long that will last...
 
LCAT - keep it up, it sound like you're doing great. I'm at the not much energy level, but sring has been trying to arrive and that encourages me to do more. just not the essentials, like a clean house. Oh well.
 
I'm fortunate enough to have some supportive family members and a great bf. But at the end of the day, they really don't understand. I think the only way that they could would be if they had Crohn's as well...and I wouldn't wish that on any of them.

When I was first diagnosed back in 1998, my mom really wanted to find local support groups for me to talk to others that have gone through it before. But I was too young, scared and proud to admit I needed help understanding how much my life would be changing.

I've only been looking around this forum for a few days now, but I've been reading a lot of posts and it's been very touching and emotional ...I've lost count of the number of times I've been reading something and I think to myself...no shit me too!
 
I am so glad you found us. I hope you can find a local group as well. There is nothing like not having to explain yourself all the time. And it gives you courage to hang on when you see others hanging on as well. Can you give your family and bf a book to read? Crohn's for Dummies is a good one. Maybe have them read the forums some to maybe get more understanding. Anyway, glad we can be here for you.
 
Didn't pass my physical testing for police process hiring today. Feel like a failure. Was close but I just couldn't do it. Was the second to last test on the physical too. So close yet so far. Passed bench, 300m sprint, vertical, and push-up....failed sit-up and I was done. Had mile and a half which would have been a struggle anyway. Because I'm trying to be a police officer, I get passed over for other jobs. They want people that will make a career out of it. Feel like a failure. Have a fiancé. Graduate in May. Have to be moved out by June. No place to go and no job. :(
 
I'm glad I found this thread because just yesterday I was having an emotional day feeling very much like a burden. I'm 28 and have to be taken care of by my girlfriend and mother. I hate that their lives have to revolve around mine so much.
 
I'm glad I found this thread because just yesterday I was having an emotional day feeling very much like a burden. I'm 28 and have to be taken care of by my girlfriend and mother. I hate that their lives have to revolve around mine so much.

I'm 22 and last year I was being taken care of by my mother. By girlfriends mother (now fiancé) and girlfriend (now fiancé) I know the feeling. But we can't help it. But it sucks feeling that way.
 

Lisa

Adminstrator
Staff member
Location
New York, USA
Didn't pass my physical testing for police process hiring today. Feel like a failure. Was close but I just couldn't do it. Was the second to last test on the physical too. So close yet so far. Passed bench, 300m sprint, vertical, and push-up....failed sit-up and I was done. Had mile and a half which would have been a struggle anyway. Because I'm trying to be a police officer, I get passed over for other jobs. They want people that will make a career out of it. Feel like a failure. Have a fiancé. Graduate in May. Have to be moved out by June. No place to go and no job. :(
Don't write off being a police officer....keep studying and practicing.....a LOT of people don't pass the physical portion of testing the first or even second time...here in NY, the CPAT can drop a prospective firefighter on the first obstacle - the stair stepper.....I've seen people only last 20 seconds before failing! Look at what you did as an accomplishment - you made it so far...next time the goal should be to make it farther.....and GOOD LUCK!!!!!

I don't quite understand why you get passed over for other jobs - do you come out and tell them you are looking for short term? I don't know if that is such a good idea - you definitely don't have to volunteer that type of information..... also, many cops have a b-job due to work schedules.....
 
Don't write off being a police officer....keep studying and practicing.....a LOT of people don't pass the physical portion of testing the first or even second time...here in NY, the CPAT can drop a prospective firefighter on the first obstacle - the stair stepper.....I've seen people only last 20 seconds before failing! Look at what you did as an accomplishment - you made it so far...next time the goal should be to make it farther.....and GOOD LUCK!!!!!



I don't quite understand why you get passed over for other jobs - do you come out and tell them you are looking for short term? I don't know if that is such a good idea - you definitely don't have to volunteer that type of information..... also, many cops have a b-job due to work schedules.....

I'm not going to stop trying. I just need a job in general. I am focusing right now on my studies so the gym has not been able to fit in my schedule. I only have a month left. Problem with me is I'm too honest. They ask what my degree was in and I'm upfront about it. It's just who I am. I am working on another prospective job. But I've also changed my how I approach my future plans. I will try to become a part time officer at some point but not on the near future.
 
Thank you Dusty for all that you wrote, every bad day i have i always come hear and it always lifts my spirits! Thank you so much
 
Hello,
I'm new here and this is my first activity of any kind, I have a long story (as we all do), but just don't feel like writing about it today, I will soon, as I'm at the tail end ( I'm hoping) of the worst and longest flare-up I've had in 4-years, Thanks DustyKat for your thread, it did make me feel better, what I've always had a problem with family and friends is how Crohn's or IBS are considered a nothing disease to all who don't have it, in my case it might be because I've never talked about it for fear of being considered a whinner or complainer and didn't want to be a burden to anyone!
 
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Wow, such an awesome post. I just read it out loud to my husband who is suffering from Crohn's and it immediately made him smile. Thank you so so much for these words :)
 
Great topic and I've been struggling to post. We need support regardless and I know we can be difficult and miserable sometimes to be around, as such is my case. Me and my wife have been separated almost a year now and it seems she couldn't take me anymore. She was very supportive but I guess I had fallen depressed back in 2010 when diagnosed with UC and have not come out of it. I wasn't giving enough back and I will regret it along with the chance to live with and raise my kids. I guess my message is try your best to thank your support group around you, whoever they are. Life sucks without them. Here's to another bout with Prednisone, cheery me!
 
:ghug:



Hope you are okay DarrinA.



Dusty. xxx

Thanks DustyKat, things aren't well and I am looking for some support, hence on this forum. Depression has taken over and not sure how to get out of it. Marriage was great until I really got sick and seems everything just got hard for everyone around me. Gonna start on Entyvio soon and hope this can bring some positives back for me. Sorry for sounding like a downer but lack of energy combined with inability to leave the house for any length of time has been real hard. 37 and living with my parents and paying for my house that I don't live in is just adding to my stress levels. Thanks again and looking for some local support groups in Vancouver, Canada. Haven't reached out to date but think it's time. All the best.
 

fuzzy butterfly

Well-known member
Hi dusty, just found this thread, all i can say is you are just damed AWESOME !!!!!..:dusty::dusty::award2:
BEAUTIFULL, message, we try not to be a burden, dont want to be a burden, but somehow feel we are, it helps to know that others dont always see us that way, :mademyday:.. more power to your elbow girl, xx
 

DustyKat

Super Moderator
Thanks DustyKat, things aren't well and I am looking for some support, hence on this forum. Depression has taken over and not sure how to get out of it. Marriage was great until I really got sick and seems everything just got hard for everyone around me. Gonna start on Entyvio soon and hope this can bring some positives back for me. Sorry for sounding like a downer but lack of energy combined with inability to leave the house for any length of time has been real hard. 37 and living with my parents and paying for my house that I don't live in is just adding to my stress levels. Thanks again and looking for some local support groups in Vancouver, Canada. Haven't reached out to date but think it's time. All the best.
I am so very sorry to hear of all you are going DarrinA. :hug:

It is not uncommon for those with IBD to suffer with anxiety and/or depression, research is now placing it as high as 25-30%. Not hard to see why considering the nature the beast that IBD is. :( Place that on top with all you are dealing with in your personal life and I can surely understand why the black dog has come calling. :(

I too hope the Entyvio proves to be very successful for you and I think you are right in starting to look for support from like minded folk. They say a problem shared is a problem halved and I truly do believe that is the case when you have a chronic disease. When you find people that understand what you are dealing with it certainly can lighten the load by breaking the isolation and frustration that is often felt.

Good luck mate and please stay in touch.

Dusty. xxx
 

DustyKat

Super Moderator
Hi dusty, just found this thread, all i can say is you are just damed AWESOME !!!!!..:dusty::dusty::award2:
BEAUTIFULL, message, we try not to be a burden, dont want to be a burden, but somehow feel we are, it helps to know that others dont always see us that way, :mademyday:.. more power to your elbow girl, xx
:redface::redface::redface: Thank you for your warm and kind words!

I hear where you are coming from mandyk. :ghug: And believe you me, no, we don’t see you that way.

Speaking generally...
That doesn’t mean we don’t have our bad days and we might sound angry, lord knows I have done that to the kids and I’m not proud of it! :redface: But on reflection it has been borne out of frustration and heartbreak that I can’t do a damned thing to take this disease away from them. And I would hazard to say that for your loved ones it to is borne out of the helplessness of seeing you suffer. :(

All that said I will acknowledge again that I know there are those that don’t have the love and support of the ones that should show that to them unconditionally...family. I hope that if this is the case you can turn to trusted and supportive friends. In my mind a good supportive mate far outweighs bad blood (as in family) any day. :)

Dusty. xxx
 

fuzzy butterfly

Well-known member
So true dusty,I am quite lucky my family and friends are of great support, but like your self sometimes feel are if they are helpless/useless, but now you believe me when I say, you all are so helpful/useful just by being there and being you, and we appriciate that beyond all else.like you I feel so sorry got others that don't have that support, and pray they find this forum, so they will get some of that from all of us here.. God bless you and your children xx
 
Thank you, DustyKat! These are the exact words I want my daughter to hear and understand :) She has been very ill for six months and recently diagnosed with Crohns. She feels like a huge burden and isn't at all..Yes, it is hard sometimes but, I love her dearly and am always there for her. She feels because she is 28 yrs that she shouldn't need so much help.
 
Well I was going to put this in the "If you could offer ONE piece of advice to a Crohn's sufferer" thread but I don't think it fits there (((shrug))).

If you are fortunate enough, and I only say that 'cause I know some of you on here aren't supported by your family :(, to have loved ones that care about you please know that you are not a burden to us. We do what we do for you because we love you more than life itself.

We understand your struggles and are there with you.

We wish we could take the pain away and when we can't we are there to hold your hand, cuddle and soothe you.

We are there to cry with you and for you.

We are there to clean up after you.

We are there when you have to endure difficult diets.

We are there when you are admitted for long and frightening hospital stays.

We are there to support and advocate for you when you go to see your doctors and have tests.

We are there to remind you to take your tablets. :)

We are there to listen when this bloody disease is too much to bear.

We are there to fight for you when all hope is gone.

We wish more than anything in the world that you didn't have this disease.

We rejoice with you when you are in remission and times are good.

.............................. and we wouldn't have it any other way.

Dusty.
Thank you for this post very much.

2
 
A little update on myself. I did get a job. About a month before graduation of college. It's at a dealership in the service department as a service department. I just hope I can get Into shape so I'm not stuck in it forever
 
Thank you just to read that feel like crying stupid eh know that by thing's a certain someone says that she wants to understand and no matter how far i fall of the way side that she loves me no matter what to say i hate the feeling like a burden part is an understatement will read this over and over and share it with my precious one ☺
 
Thank you just to read that feel like crying stupid eh know that by thing's a certain someone says that she wants to understand and no matter how far i fall of the way side that she loves me no matter what to say i hate the feeling like a burden part is an understatement will read this over and over and share it with my precious one ☺
I had a resection six years ago and my wife was by my side the whole way.
 
By now after all we been through and the fact she puts up with me though we're some 10.000 miles apart still feel like she's by my side every day
 
Hi all hoping you're all well as can be how to you make family aware of either ibd or ibs multiple symptoms without starting a totally unessacery and unintended arguement.My partner I'm easy enough in the knowledge that i don't have to go on about my condition and really wuite happy that i have her in my life but my family won't even read the support section on here though I've tried to steer them in the direction of the link.
 
I'm fortunate enough to have some supportive family members and a great bf. But at the end of the day, they really don't understand. I think the only way that they could would be if they had Crohn's as well...and I wouldn't wish that on any of them.

When I was first diagnosed back in 1998, my mom really wanted to find local support groups for me to talk to others that have gone through it before. But I was too young, scared and proud to admit I needed help understanding how much my life would be changing.

I've only been looking around this forum for a few days now, but I've been reading a lot of posts and it's been very touching and emotional ...I've lost count of the number of times I've been reading something and I think to myself...no shit me too!
Hey Hangryginger! I can relate to what you are saying. I have a supportive family as well but they just don't get my fears and feelings like a person with Crohn's would.

My father keeps telling me not to think too much and not read stuff online. Sometimes it frustrates me that he loves me so much and yet he doesn't understand that I can't help thinking nor researching stuff.

I'm from Mumbai, India and many doctors are still clueless about Crohn's. We don't have supports groups where we can meet and talk about how we feel. I found this forum yesterday and I am so glad I joined. I finally have people who know exactly how I feel.

I don't have bf because I am too scared of being rejected because of this disease. I have had this disease since 2 years and it's taken me a while to accept it and deal with it.

All the best to you. And you are definitely not a burden. We are all in this together. Keep us posted on how you are doing. Tc.
 
I'm fortunate enough to have some supportive family members and a great bf. But at the end of the day, they really don't understand. I think the only way that they could would be if they had Crohn's as well...and I wouldn't wish that on any of them.

When I was first diagnosed back in 1998, my mom really wanted to find local support groups for me to talk to others that have gone through it before. But I was too young, scared and proud to admit I needed help understanding how much my life would be changing.

I've only been looking around this forum for a few days now, but I've been reading a lot of posts and it's been very touching and emotional ...I've lost count of the number of times I've been reading something and I think to myself...no shit me too!
I know that feeling! Similar situation to mine. I was diagnosed in 2003 but felt much too young to really comprehend what was happening. The doctors initially suggested support groups but I kinda just wanted to be left with it to deal with it alone.
I was invited once to talk to other teenagers who didn't want to take their medication "because it wasn't cool". Had to give them a quick reality check, explaining what happened when I laid off the Asacol for two weeks...
 
My mother told me this month she doesn't love me and I don't exist to her. So even though I don't have the support of my parents, I have absolutely unconditional loving friends and in-laws. Support may not come from who you think it should be, but if you look around, there are amazing supports out there. Never never quit
 

fuzzy butterfly

Well-known member
So sorry that your mother has said that to you...but so very glad that you have plenty of support from friends n in laws.
Keep on keeping on and keep as well as you can.
Best wishes 💕
 
I am definitely a burden both to myself and my whole family. Obviously they can never understand what it is like having to go through daily torture and having no life.
The disease is just bringing misery on a daily basis and most likely just going to be getting worse down the line.
Thinking about contacting one of those euthanasia groups that offer assisted suicide.
 
I am definitely a burden both to myself and my whole family. Obviously they can never understand what it is like having to go through daily torture and having no life.
The disease is just bringing misery on a daily basis and most likely just going to be getting worse down the line.
Thinking about contacting one of those euthanasia groups that offer assisted suicide.
Everyone here cares about you!! If you want you can always talk privately.
 
I know it's been a couple days since the last reply, and I'm new to this forum/website, but this is exactly the type of thread I need right now!

I was diagnosed a few months ago and I've been flaring nonstop ever since, and I just feel bad because I'm 19 and my parents are already paying for my college--I'm 100% grateful--but now I feel like such a financial burden because they're also paying for my medications and medical bills! None of my siblings have big, expensive medical bills like I do, and now my doctor says I need to consider Remicade/Humira, but those are both so expensive! I don't know what to do. I just feel so bad.
 
I know it's been a couple days since the last reply, and I'm new to this forum/website, but this is exactly the type of thread I need right now!

I was diagnosed a few months ago and I've been flaring nonstop ever since, and I just feel bad because I'm 19 and my parents are already paying for my college--I'm 100% grateful--but now I feel like such a financial burden because they're also paying for my medications and medical bills! None of my siblings have big, expensive medical bills like I do, and now my doctor says I need to consider Remicade/Humira, but those are both so expensive! I don't know what to do. I just feel so bad.
Both Remicade and Humira have plans to help financially. Remicade has Remistart and if you do Humira if you get on their plan it is five dollars each time.
 
I am a waste of a human being. I have no future. It has been sacrificed to being in pain and feeling sad. All I wanted was the same chances as everyone else. It's all so desperately unfair. I'll never be a success. My parents must look at me as a failure. They must be embarrassed by their damaged son. I can't even fulfil my partners needs because they took that part away. I hate it. I hate everything about the pain and the bag. All the pills. All the scars. I want my body back. I want to feel like a proper man.
 
I am a waste of a human being. I have no future. It has been sacrificed to being in pain and feeling sad. All I wanted was the same chances as everyone else. It's all so desperately unfair. I'll never be a success. My parents must look at me as a failure. They must be embarrassed by their damaged son. I can't even fulfil my partners needs because they took that part away. I hate it. I hate everything about the pain and the bag. All the pills. All the scars. I want my body back. I want to feel like a proper man.
You are not a waste as a human being. You are here for a purpose Everyone here supports you . Doctors are making progress all the time. Please feel fee to on me .
 
I’m glad I’ve found this and have been able to read these posts.
I’m really struggling with the feelings my new diagnosis has entailed.
I’m exhausted from the tablets, the disease and from fighting doctors for years.
I love my husband but I feel like I’m letting him down. I feel lazy for sleeping and resting so much. I feel like he’s going to have enough of me being lazy and who could blame him. Poor bloke!
Thanks for the space to vent
Fliss x
 
hang in there. I struggle with this too but you can learn and take good care of yourself. I wrote this website to hopefully help. crohnsnhope.com. It is a rough disease but you are NOT alone.
 
Well I was going to put this in the "If you could offer ONE piece of advice to a Crohn's sufferer" thread but I don't think it fits there (((shrug))).

If you are fortunate enough, and I only say that 'cause I know some of you on here aren't supported by your family :(, to have loved ones that care about you please know that you are not a burden to us. We do what we do for you because we love you more than life itself.

We understand your struggles and are there with you.

We wish we could take the pain away and when we can't we are there to hold your hand, cuddle and soothe you.

We are there to cry with you and for you.

We are there to clean up after you.

We are there when you have to endure difficult diets.

We are there when you are admitted for long and frightening hospital stays.

We are there to support and advocate for you when you go to see your doctors and have tests.

We are there to remind you to take your tablets. :)

We are there to listen when this bloody disease is too much to bear.

We are there to fight for you when all hope is gone.

We wish more than anything in the world that you didn't have this disease.

We rejoice with you when you are in remission and times are good.

.............................. and we wouldn't have it any other way.

Dusty.
Very nice ,but, not all family are affectionate like that you are a saint , me I was always alone going throughweeks long stays in the hospital and massive pain suffering wives kids get used to the idea you are very sick so it starts to be no BIG DEAL anymore ,, I had positive thinking I even wrote about it on how it save my life [in the NAVY when intestine ruptured and close to dieing..........Very happy to hear that family still help in such ways STAY STRONG keep " HOPE alive
 
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