katiesue1506 said:
We are in the age at which we can somewhat take our health into our own hands through diet, exercise, peace of mind, and general positive attitudes.
This portion is why I believe I can control my death, TO AN EXTENT, meaning I can have a very influential pull on things. Thus, I worry a bit about it. I don't count the days, and yes I'm an anxious, depressed, overanalytical creature by default, but I sure as hell feel it's not something that is spiritually decided in "my file" somewhere due to fate and other powers that be. I'm going to push to live a longer and happier life (that second part I feel is my biggest challenge).
I also don't understand the part where people detest the concept of perpetual existence, upwards of 80 and over....why do you "not want to live that long"? Probably because you see 80 year olds and they're on the cusp of leaving this world from issues, age is not so structured IMO....ever hear of those stories of the 95 year olds who go on a half mile walk every day, play with their dogs, have minimal health issues, play chess in the park, play with great-grandkids, go play a light sport, then go home and get romantic with a spouse after a 16 hour day? They're out there, and they pushed on that long most likely by treating their bodies well (possibly genetics too)...so, they live like they're 55, not 95, and this to me is evidence that I want to live long into my potential, at least to 3 digits (that sounds like I could push to 4 digits if I try hard doesn't it
). I feel it's like any other piece of equipement, don't clean it, fuel it, and treat it right, it will age accordingly. And, I am of the utmost certainty that I can "treat it right" AND HAVE A BLAST DOING IT, so I will not drag on like a boring opera as opposed to a fast action movie. I want to be great, and leave my mark doing it, simple as that. That's why I'm still quite devastated at my diagnosis and ongoing troubles.