Hey Everyone! I am new here but I decided I really needed someone to talk to who understands what I am going through and maybe offer some advice! 
. Here is my story (Sorry if it gets long!):
My husband and I were married 6 years ago. We have a 5 year old daughter and a 2 year old son.
When we had been married only 2 years my husband joined the Army. We moved to WA and he was set to deploy in a few months. About a month before he was to deploy he started having really bad back pain. He didn't know what was going on but it continued to get worse for a few days. Eventually I talked him into letting me take him to the ER where they decided his appendix needed to be taken out. There were complications with the surgery so instead of doing it laparoscopically they had to cut him clear open. Apparently at this point they discovered that his bowel were twisted and so they untwisted them, examined them, and discovered what they believed to be Crohn's disease. Up to this point my husband was VERY healthy aside from some pain in his back occasionally. NEVER any issues with eating or anything GI related. However, after having his appendix removed he started to be in severe pain most every night and especially after eating things that (we now know) he should not have. Many doctors visits and procedures later came the official diagnosis.
Because he is in such bad shape now the military decided that they could not use him after all and over the next year they completed the paperwork to medically discharge him with a 90% disability rating. This means that my husband is receiving a disability check from the government because he is unable to work. He has gotten to the point where he is depressed. He is on antidepressants and sees a counselor. ANYWAYS...
My real frustration here is this. My day begins when the children wake at about 7:00. I get up do the cleaning and breakfast and care for my kids and then at about noon when I get the kids down for a nap I check on my husband and see if he is ready to take a shower to help relieve some of his back pain. After this he goes about doing whatever he can for the day and I go back to my laundry or whatever. I spend my whole day caring for my children and husband and then in the evening after my husband has exhausted himself I put the kids to bed, and usually climb into bed myself at about 10:30 or 11 and then make a few middle of the night trips to put my 2 year old back to bed or bring my husband anything he needs or take care of my daughter and then do it all again the next day. I am completely exhausted all of the time. I do not know how much longer I can keep this up...
Even on the days when I don't feel good I still have to do it all myself. I basically feel like a single parent most days except for the fact that I have to also care for my sick husband... I know that it sounds like I am complaining and maybe I am but I don't want to complain to him because it is not his fault and I don't want him to feel bad but I do need to tell someone...
The doctors say his disease is "Under control" and there is nothing else he can do. He is on Humira shots every 2 weeks and while they do seem to help I don't feel like it is enough! His brother who also has Crohn's is able to lead a mostly normal life with a few obvious exceptions.. but my husband has almost no quality of life and I want to know what I can do to help him and make life easier for us both!
