Curious...

[SwtNdSpcy]

I just read a post about unsupportive loved ones regarding Crohn's. It got me thinking about all the times I was told I have to be being dramatic, that it couldn't possibly be that bad. Or that I was making it all up for sympathy.
I think my biggest critic was my mother. I could handle these sentiments from strangers, employers, etc. But to have my own mother tell me I was just being dramatic really hurt.
I have had a very rough last 3 years with my disease, progressively getting worse. My last surgery really messed me up and I have not even been close to feeling well since.
I got so upset with my mom that I just went off on her describing in detail what I went through. Mind you this was before I was put on Zoloft.. LOL. Since then however, she really has seemed to at least back off and try to be supportive.
I was wondering how everyone else has handled those times when they are told they are faking it, being dramatic or making it up?
Am I the only one who has completely lost it with someone who didn't understand?

 

[AndiGirl]

Hi SwtNdSpcy! You are far from being alone sister. I had to work on my father for the longest time. I find it very ironic because Crohn's Disease is well established on my father's side of the father. For many years, he watched his own father, a tough, burly fisherman suffer with horrible symptoms, complications, and eventually a total colectomy.

My father doesn't doubt that I have CD (a chronic illness), but he has treated me like I'm being super sensitive and dramatic. Never in a million years would my grandfather ever let on that he was in pain. Fisherman are a tough, macho breed of men. You puke over the side of the boat and keep fishing! My brother has CD also and he doesn't show any emotion when it comes to pain. I've had to deal with my father's comments of, "You just need to fight through it. Toughen up! It's not going to help to cry." I am thankful that my mother is very understanding and supportive regarding the CD. She has told my father off on numerous occasions. My brother has also in my behalf.

Glad to have you on board here. Nobody here will (or should) ever make you feel like it's all in your head, or that you are exaggerating the pain. Hugs!

 

[moogie]

I know the feeling.

My family sometimes think I am lazy because Ic an't do all the chores at home like mowing the lawn taking the garbarge out and everything that has to do with keeping a big house in good order. Most days I can take care of the taks but some days sometimes even weeks I can'T and they think I am just lazy.

Wish they really understood what pain we have to endure and how tired we get when things are going bad.

Oh well... life without pain is something I can dream about like winning the lottery...

 

[SwtNdSpcy]

Andi, thank you! I have posted here a little, and have always found everyone to be very helpful and supportive! In fact, I think I joined this site when I was having a very hard time dealing with everything and you all were very welcoming and sympathetic. It helped so much to know I wasn't alone and that there were people who did completely understand how I felt! Don't get me wrong, my husband and my friends have always been supportive and as understanding as anyone who hasn't been through it could be.... but my family and even my doctors didn't seem to understand!
Things for me mentally are better now. My new GI put me on Zoloft, and it does help a little with dealing with the illness. Plus, Just a couple weeks ago I was finally approved for SSD. That was a major turning point in my mood. It was incredibly validating for me to finally have the state recognize that I wasn't just being lazy!

Moogie, I completely understand! I hate being thought of as lazy! I have never been lazy. I often get frustrated and depressed and cry because I wish I could do the things that need to be done that I just can't do. I am, in fact, missing my children's parent/teacher conferances right now because this has been a very very bad day.

 

[Astra]

oooooooooo yes! I am a Tiger!

Sorry, didn't mean to scare you, ha ha ha, as if!

But I really put my point across didn't I? :whistleinnocently:

 

[bruscar]

Yep ya sure did, oh by the way sorry about the grand slam !!