When I was first returning to eating food after several months on EEN, I went in to a restaurant with other parents from my son's team. It was wintertime and very cold out. I brought in an sealed container of plain, unsweetened soy milk and asked if they could heat it in the microwave for me so I could warm up. I did not plan to eat any food, but I was with a table of ten others who were all ordering full meals.
The server initially told me that, due to health reasons, she couldn't do this for me because it was food from outside the restaurant. I asked her what she suggested I do as there was nothing on the menu that I could have. I asked her what she would do if I had asked her to heat a bottle or baby food. She relented on the condition that I 'hide' the original container so she wouldn't get in trouble with her boss.
At the time I was still very ill and I didn't want to cause a fuss in front of my son and his friends. I have come along way since then and would handle it quite differently now.
Now I would ask to speak with the manager and if they wouldn't accomodate me, I would leave. I would not insist that the others join me, but would let them decide for themselves.
It is great that you are thinking about these things now, farmwife, so you and your family can teach Grace how to be an advocate for herself. One day she will have to stand up for herself, and it will be your good modelling that will have taught her. Good for you.
