How do I best support a friend that was just diagnosed with Crohns?

[howdoihelp]

Hi there.

I have a good friend/coworker that was just diagnosed with Crohn's - she's on medicine that has lot of side affects (only been on it for a week or two) and she's having to completely overhaul her diet & life style. She's not someone who asks for help or complains about ANYTHING, but I know this has to be very difficult for her.
I don't want to bug her too much about how she's feeling everyday but I want her to know I care & I want to help her in any way I can.

You guys live with it everyday so I figured this would be the place to come - Any advice on what I could do to show her I'm here? Or does any one have any ideas of things I could do to help her out so she won't have to ask?

Thanks for the input!!

 

[Crohn's 35]

Hi there and welcome you are a sweetie for seeking help from us. To understand first of all it is bad enough for men but women alike are embarrassed to talk about it. Not work related issue and some people dont tell anyone. Sometimes stress brings it on and therefore they thing it is their own doing. Depends on her severity, and the meds she is on, she will go through a mental change too, it is a scary disease until she gets all the information she can.

Tell her that any time you need to cover for her, that would mean alot, even telling her that you dont fully understand but you are will to be there, support means alot. Depending on her age, status, and her support at home, she may keep it at home and doesnt want to risk losing her job, so she keeps quiet, keeping her confidence would be great too.

You could mention this forum, if she feels she could get some great insight and help and advice from us. Though we are not doctors, we could help settle her fears and what to expect. There is no cure so she needs to deal with her life and get her Crohns stable. We would welcome her with open arms.

Again, I commend you for being a caring person, she will be glad you are there for her. She will talk if she trusts you. There is not tmi for us, we have heard it all. Even if she just browses here it could help her decide. She needs to know she is not alone, we are here!

Take care.

 

[pb4]

I agree with jettalady, you're so sweet to care for your co-worker dealing with this awful disease.

If she doesn't already know about support groups like this, then definitely point her in this direction.

it can be frustrating for sure, not just for the patient but for the people around them having to adjust as well...frequent trips to the toilet can affect more than just the patiens, like their friends and family that also have to pause that movie till they get back or find shopping harder cuz alot of that shopping time becomes consumed with "where's the damed bathroom, I gotta "go" again", so I feel for my friends and family but I've had it for 19yrs so they're probably used to it more than I am.

It's the little things that help too, just listening and lots of hugs...and remind her to take it one day at a time, it is life altering for many of us, especially the more severe, the more altering it is.

 

[shazamataz]

Welcome and good job on being such a caring person Good idea to point her towards the forum as well as it's a great bunch- really supportive and informative

 

[Pirate]

Welcome Howdoihelp. You all ready have helped by wanting to learn. By learning what this disease does to you co-worker you will be educated as to what to look for when your coworker is feeling low. Support of a friend means a lot to us even if we have family support.
When they are feeling bad, give them a card just to let them know you care. Lend an ear when things are bad, because mentally this disease is a killer.

Thank-you for being a friend.