How to use Crohn's/UC as an explanation and not an excuse???

[Isabelly]

Hi all,

This is something I've been thinking about for the past couple months, and I guess this is a good place to ask it.

How can I explain my situation without sounding like I'm making excuses?

I'm in college and I keep having to miss classes due to doctor's appointments (I didn't have this disease when I scheduled my classes!), or just due to feeling terrible. It's more because of appointments than feeling sick, but there are still days when I just can't go to class (same goes for work).

So I feel like I should tell my teachers (and my boss) why I have all these appointments, but I'm afraid of sounding like I expect special treatment. The thought of it makes me incredibly uncomfortable, but there's no other way around it so I just have to figure out the best way to tell them, I guess.

Have you had to explain your diagnosis to anyone like this, and if so, how did you do it?


*If you're wondering, I've already figured out that there's no possible way to schedule an appointment after all my classes. The doctor that I go to closes at 4pm and it's at least an hour away (my classes start at 8am and end at 3pm, everyday).

 

[Cross-stitch gal]

Dealing with a new diagnosis is extremely challenging, especially at first. And, it will take a bit for you to get into the groove as far as figuring things out. Juggling work, school and appointments can become a headache. As hard as it is, honesty is best. If need be, is it possible to get a doctor's note for work and/or school? Sometimes that might help as far as the appointments. In the meantime, here are a couple links to websites of info that might help. Remember that we're here to talk to as well. Take care.

http://www.webmd.com/ibd-crohns-disease/features/uc-employment

https://www.crohnsandcolitis.com/living-with-crohns-uc/crohns/daily-life

 

[scottsma]

I know it sounds a bit "dated" but when I was diagnosed I was given printed material explaining the symptoms and everything else relating to Crohns and U.C.Perhaps you could print off some relative (to you) material and offer it to those who need to know.I also agree that a doctors letter would be helpful,and you could also duplicate that too.

 

[Jabee]

As a former college professor I can tell you that I always appreciated how hard it was for students to tell me about personal issues, and how grateful I was that they trusted me. It made it much easier for me to make sure they didn't miss material if they missed a class or two (or more). Living with a chronic disease is hard, and explaining to your professors why you are missing classes is never a bad idea. One of my daughter suffers from anxiety and has always told her teachers about it at the start of the school year. They are always supportive. I am so sorry you are dealing with feeling ill while in college.

 

[shamrock15]

For me, this is a matter of viewpoint (as long as you are honest with yourself and doing the best you can with the situation).

Those who recognize your efforts will always see it as an explanation. Those who don't will likely see an excuse. All you can do is make the information available and hopefully it is properly perceived. These invisible illnesses just aren't fun that way.

 

[Maya142]

I have two daughters around your age who have chronic illnesses. My younger one is in college - she is a freshman. What helped most was registering with the Office of Disabilities. Any chronic illness counts as a disability and the Office of Disabilities has been a huge help. She receives accommodations like stop the clock testing, so that she can go to the bathroom during exams. Extensions on work when she is unwell, disability housing (access to a kitchen and semi-private bathroom), notes when she has to miss class for an appointment - that kind of stuff.

She also gets to take exams in the Office of Disabilities, so that she doesn't feel bad about disturbing the class, if she has to get up to go to the bathroom a lot.

My daughters both informed their professors at the beginning of the semester that they have a chronic illness and they were registered with the Office of Disabilities and would need some accommodations. It worked well - most professors have been very kind.

The school is required to accommodate you - it's the law. Don't feel bad about asking for you need. Some professors may require you to get a note to explain absences, but they should understand. You can't help being sick - you didn't ask for this!

 

[Isabelly]

Wow, thank you everybody!! These are all really helpful answers, and I'll definitely check with the disability services at my school.

Thank you everybody for understanding and giving real answers!!! It's so nice to know that so many people here understand not only the disease we're dealing with, but also my situation.

 

[aypues]

I wish I had known about the disability office when I was in college (1996-2000). That would've possibly helped. I even had to drop out one quarter due to Crohn's surgery!!! That was rough.