Humiliated At Work

[DawnD]

I have worked for a small company for a little over a year. They know I have Crohn's disease and that I have diarrhea all the time. Today, I went in to the female restroom (only used by me and the owner's wife), and on the toilet is a note that says "Please clean toilet rim mishaps after using the toilet. No one wants to use a dirtly toilet. There is disinfectant and toilet brushes located right next to the toilet".

I could understand if the toilet "seat" was dirty....but the rim of the toilet????

 

[JennaRae]

That is ridiculous. At the very least they could've come to you privately.
I'm sorry you had to deal with that.

 

[afidz]

I am sorry this happened to you, I have had similar things happen to me in the workplace as well. Its just plain embarrassing and rude. Unfortunately, unless they have the disease, they will never understand.

 

[Ihurt]

Honestly, that was somewhat rude of her to do by leaving a note like that . She could have said something in a nice manner perhaps.

I honestly am a germaphobe so I always clean my toliet after going to the bathroom whether I have Diarreha or not. I mean I get UTI's very easily so I have to make sure the toliet is clean rim and all or I wont use it, way to risky. But that is me and again I have a valid reason due my risk of infections.

That being said, she still was wrong for how she did that. I mean she almost bordered on being sarcasticly mean..








QUOTE=DawnD;580730]I have worked for a small company for a little over a year. They know I have Crohn's disease and that I have diarrhea all the time. Today, I went in to the female restroom (only used by me and the owner's wife), and on the toilet is a note that says "Please clean toilet rim mishaps after using the toilet. No one wants to use a dirtly toilet. There is disinfectant and toilet brushes located right next to the toilet".

I could understand if the toilet "seat" was dirty....but the rim of the toilet????[/QUOTE]

 

[xX_LittleMissValentine_Xx]

Sorry you had to deal with that.
The tone is horrible, and leaving a note is childish. Reminds me of uni share house situations!

 

[Pie-Guy]

Leave a note of your own.

Thanks for making an already unpleasant situation in my life even more unpleasant. I know you probably initially planned to take me aside and discreetly talk to me about your concerns but felt uncomfortable about it. You then decided using a note was an equally acceptable way to communicate a message about such a delicate matter. I hope any future communications will not involve any sort of paper.

Robb

 

[Gra]

I have worked for a small company for a little over a year. They know I have Crohn's disease and that I have diarrhea all the time. Today, I went in to the female restroom (only used by me and the owner's wife), and on the toilet is a note that says "Please clean toilet rim mishaps after using the toilet. No one wants to use a dirtly toilet. There is disinfectant and toilet brushes located right next to the toilet".

I could understand if the toilet "seat" was dirty....but the rim of the toilet????

Some people are just very rude and insensitive. Sorry that this happened to you.

 

[Grumbletum]

I'd be tempted to leave a note of my own saying you've flushed hers away as it's a load of sh*t. I guess in the interest of work relationships you can't really do that.

 

[Ya noy]

How about just leaving a copy of the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act) in the bathroom,along with a handwritten notation (to your attorney) that no similar notice has been posted in the men's bathroom of your workplace?

Discrimination is illegal and workplaces are required by federal law to make "reasonable accommodations" for employees with disabilities.

I paid quite a bit for a toilet that rarely requires cleaning. Special surface,depth, etc. I would think requesting a similar toilet so they do not feel the need to humiliate you would be a "reasonable accommodation" you could request your employer make.

 

[lisakuney]

I am so sorry you felt humiliated. I think she could have been more straightforward with you in communicating her desire to keep the toilet clean. It's hard working in a small office setting like that when you have a condition that occasions copious and uncontrollable bodily functions.

I know this may not be popular given what everyone above has said, but I will say that I feel the same way as your boss. If I went into a toilet at work and there was poo on the rim/sides, and it was the only toilet I had access to, I'd want it to be clean too. If I know that only one other person uses that toilet and I didn't leave the poo there, I'd want for them to clean up after themselves. I took pains to clean up the toilet at work if I nuked it (before I became unable to work). I asked my boss lady if she could add Clorox wipes to the supplies kept in the ladies' loo so I could. I clean my toilets at home when flushing doesn't reach everything that needs to go down the tubes, as sometimes intestinal backpressure makes stuff go everywhere (the "jet propelled" poo).

It sounds like the biggest problem is her passive-aggressive communication style, and not that she wanted you to return the toilet to usable condition after using it. At least, that's my take. Do you have objections to being asked to clean up if the toilet gets messy when you use it? Kind of seems like common sense/courtesy to me, but I know that many folks are deeply embarrassed by their symptoms and don't want them pointed out in any way. I figure if you can't help having a disease, why be embarrassed about it? I was born without an inner voice, and am a very straightforward communicator, so take that into consideration

 

[D Bergy]

No matter how this was communicated to you, it would have been uncomfortable to say the least. Since you and the other person are the only ones to use the bathroom, it was a private communication.

If the other person was out to embarrass you they could have left a note in a public place, or brought it up in front of others.

I think she handled it the best way she thought she could. As the owners wife she could have made it far worse.

I am sure it hurt your feelings, as it would anyone, but face to face would have done the same thing. There is no good way to go about something like this.

Dan

 

[tots]

I too work in a small work environment and with my flare STILL active I have to use the only bathroom there. I always make sure no one can tell "I was there" I get very embarrassed about it. Some of the women have even learned not to bitch if I leave the fan on!


lauren

 

[fromthegut]

I am so sorry that happened to you. It is true bullies *aren't * jsut on the palyground. That is what they are doign bullying you. I hope you are feeling better. I am grateful that today i don't have that kind of diarhea !!