I dont know what to do......

[Jerman]

Hello crohnies,

Thanks to all for the kind wishes, thoughts, and support for my wife during my recent episode. It really does mean a lot to have support even though I don't yet really know any of you fine folks. thank you.

That being said, I am going to push my luck a bit and ask for your input. I feel so empty and useless. This latest visit sapped every bit of inner strength, faith, and (forgive me) intestinal fortitude that i had to offer. as you may remember this is the fifth time i have been hospitalized since march, all with no progress towards slaying the Crohn Dragon..

I had all of the damned tests again while up there. the Ct scan with contrast dye, colonoscopy, endosopy and guess what my friends?....wait for it.....wait for it.....All Tests came back clean. There is still blood work and the urine test waiting to come back but apparently I have no worries 'cuz they are all clean. During both the colonoscopy and the endoscopy I actually had hit such a pain level that i grabbed the doctor's hand! This was the first time that they were able to go into the ileum area and omg did it hurt!!! I wonder if the fact that i was in so much acute pain kind of ate away at the sedative and its effect. 'cuz i know i wasnt supposed to feel that!

They took around 8 samples from different areas to be biopsied. I feel like I am losing the battle here and am "On the ropes" taking way to many shots.

I am running out of strength and will. I am usually the last one to throw up my hands but I do feel a bit beaten down.















:depressed:

 

[farm]

I hate being in pain like that and having no one believe you.
I had a flare up a few years back and was in and out of the ER for pain.
Once I was unable to walk because of the cramping pain in my right side. My GI doc was unable to come to the ER so I got the local guy. He gave me a colonoscopy and endo. (gotta love barium) and when he was unable to see any inflammation he accused me of trying to get pain killers from him and refused to give me anymore pain meds.
So here I was with unbearable pain and from the previous ER visit I was loaded down with everything from flexeril to Demerol in my aresonal and this ******* thinks I want pain meds from him!
I fired him and raised cain. I had him leave my room and told him a few choice words on his way out. I was so mad I went home that night only to be admitted to the hospital the next day by my GI doctor because the inflammation was further up in my ileum than this ******* cared to look.

There is no test that can go through the entire ileum and detect inflammation so don't let it get you down that they found nothing. Your GI doc should still treat it as a flare up of crohn's unless he knows for a fact it is something else.

 

[Jerman]

Thank you very much for the input. I try so hard to treat others the way that i want to be treated. However, I am afraid that i lost it a bit with one of the residents at the hosp. He apparently told the nurse that he didnt think i needed anything for the pain until my scheduled next dose, which was 1 and 1/2 hours later. I asked the nurse to have him just stop by the room and i would be willing to grab him by the gut and hold on a bit till he had a good feel for what it was like!!! I am normally a really mellow guy, but i kinda lost it with this one. I get so tired of having to explain how much this pain hurts.

thanks for listening.

 

[forum contributor]

We're all here for ya, Jerman (and Laurie!). I'm sorry about your pain and situation, and I don't blame you for losing it.
Just remember that you have your CFF (Crohn's Forum Family). We care.

 

[Lisa5326]

I feel ya on the explaining part, I can't tell you how many dr's I've seen, I had a count of all that I've seen going at one point...BUT they come in ask questions, push exactly where it hurts and everyone, everyone does the same damn thing.

Hang in there and keep trying Jerman! There has to be someone out there that is willing to be on your side, we all are! Take care and vent all you want

 

[SpoonNinja]

mm im sorry for you! i remember b4 i wwas dxed whenever i would go to the er they would think i was pregnant or it was just gas! gah and im a virgin and i told them there was no chance of me being pregnant and they didnt believe me!i went to the er maybe 100 times and had way to many gi cocktails to count and finnaly i got a dr that was willing to do some digging and find out what was wrong, be glad you have drs doing the tests they can and i no its frustraiting when tests come back normal, trust me i know! but you just have to have fun with it, make a inside joke, give it life (like crohn dragon as yousaid) and when you get down just make a day where you sit and watch movies all day to take your mind away from whats going on! i hope this will help some, good luck with everything!!!