I don't recognize myself

[AbdoAlien]

Venting...needs to be done with this disease....I am getting frustrated and very angry again...I was doing ok, but still never got back to myself...or who I was before crohns...I hate how this disease changes you....I know change is good, but I liked me...now not so sure...I have amazing friends and family...and my hubby and kids are awesome...but I am so pissed off at the money I've spent, the time I've lost on the throne, the social life I've lost, the times I couldn't watch my kids sports, time I couldn't ride my horse, etc..you've all been there...yes I have gained some good stuff with this disease, I suppose...support and friends and better eating, healthier lifestyle...but still...I am sick of taking meds, I'm sick of watching everything I eat, I'm sick of the weight fluctuations, I'm sick of being poked and proded, I'm sick of being tired and exhausted... I feel soooooo lazy!!! And I am frustrated when I start to feel good and do things again and start to workout and socialize..then BAM flare again...I mean COME ON!!!!!!!!! We all need a break with this jazz......:ymad:

 

[annawato]

I'm with you all the way on this one abdoalien! Impossible to make any plans cos you never know if you'll be well enough, always having to cancel on friends at the last minute, not being well enough to contribute to family income, or household chores or even being able to cook the damn dinner for those who can eat it!Always feeling guilty that you can't do what you want to do for others or yourself. Spending months on end in hospital to the point you know the nurses better than you friends plus all the painful, frustrating and humiliating procedures. The meds and their side effects. I could go on and on. But yes there are benefits i know but that doesnt help when it all just gets to be too much. So Know that I understand exactly how you feel and that its good to write it all down like this. It'd be nice if our problems were halved by sharing - at least we can share. And now I should apologise for adding all my woes to yours when my intention was just to cheer you up. i hope tomorrow is a better day for you - at least moods pass, eventually. All the best Anna

 

[maria]

I know how you feel. I'm sorry.