My I Need Help Thread

[jamilea]

Hi There,

I need help. I'm undiagnosed and I'm at a cross roads. I'm not getting any better and this is too serious to just be sitting around being depressed all of the time.

Here is my situation; I can't drive because of a hold up in another state for a stupid fix it ticket, fine is $700 for failure to appear. My husband works long hours at the car dealership every day, only has Thursdays and Sundays off.

I need help. I need help getting organized and getting to the bottom of this. I have no health insurance but the Multiple Sclerosis Society has gotten me a referral to the John's Hopkins who wants me to apply for Medicaid and based on approval or denial, they sent me a financial assistance application in which they want me to get all these documents together for that. All this stuff to do.

I live 6 miles from the nearest bus line. I don't have any friends because I'm fairly new in Maryland and well, people just don't understand when you're sick and you can't hang out when you planned.

Also, the deacon of our church said he has doctor friends that I can go see if I need.

I have a lot of options to get help but don't know how to get it all organized. I can't seem to GET IT together! I'm depressed, sick all of the time and feel like I'm falling into a hole. My husband is so there for me but he has to work. So I'm at home all day when I need to be out getting care and a diagnosis.

I have a full fledge of symptoms and 4 brain lesions. I was in the middle of several attempts to get a diagnosis when I was laid off of work, losing my health insurance.

I can't do it by myself. I need help.

Can I go to the county and ask for a social worker to help me with this? With rides, getting Medicaid, etc?

I'm at a loss. I give up. I can't do it on my own anymore. I'm trying so hard not to break down and check out. I need someone to guide me, to help me get organized. What should I do?

 

[Jennifer]

You should be able to do most if not everything through the mail, phone and the internet. Try contacting someone from Medicaid and ask them what you need and to send you information on how to apply.

I believe this is the website: http://www.cms.gov/home/medicaid.asp There is an area that gives the contact info with phone numbers to call. Tell them your situation and you may not have to go anywhere. I don't know if a social worker can help but it doesn't hurt to call and ask.

I don't know if this helped or not, I'm not at the top of my game tonight.

 

[dreamintwilight]

I agree with Crabby's advice. Also, you mentioned your deacon knowing some doctor friends. Might he be able to help you get some kind of support from the church as far as rides and things too? I know many churches gladly help out members that are sick and in need of help.

It's good to know you understand you can't do this on your own and need help. SO many people suffering with this disease think they can fix it themselves and do everyone on their own, but it's so difficult! Even if you can do it for a while, it can really wear you down.

Definitely give some people a call. It can't hurt to talk on the phone with the people Crabby suggested and your deacon about what resources might be available to you!

 

[Cat-a-Tonic]

Poor thing, you sound totally overwhelmed. I get that way sometimes too, it just gets to be all too much, and there's so much to do and to think about on top of being so ill. My advice is to just worry about one thing at a time. Pick one thing that you can handle relatively easily and deal with that, and forget everything else for now. When you get that one thing taken care of, I promise you will feel better because you did accomplish something. And then you'll have more confidence to pick something slightly more difficult to deal with, and you can then tackle that one thing. Trust me on this, I am a natural multi-tasker, and sometimes I find I am juggling way too much at once and I just have to step back and stop trying to do everything at once. It's okay to put some things aside and it's okay to ask others for help, too (like your church deacon). Hang in there!

 

[jamilea]

Thanks ladies so much. I emailed what I said here to our congregation. The ladies called me. They are going to come over tomorrow and next week, pray with me, help me organize and get me to Medicaid and John's Hopkins to get this stuff figured out. They were so helpful and they thanked me for reaching out and asking for help.

They told me that I must give myself grace and mercy, that I don't feel good and that's okay. That when I don't feel good, it doesn't mean I've done something, or that I'm a failure, or a bad wife, or a bad person because I can't figure this out on my own.

The phone calls really really helped me.

I just sat in a tub full of cool water with worship music on, drank ginger ale and smoked a cigarette (I know it's not good for me but I don't do anything bad!).

I feel much better and I'm just going to allow myself to be sick, finally allow myself the grace that I need to just rest and do what I can like you suggest.

Thank you for the support.

It's so beautiful how people from all over the world come together and help each other, people that are complete strangers build such strong friendships and support teams over the internet. I love it, I LOVE IT!

You guys are all so beautiful, thank you.

xoxoxo

 

[Cat-a-Tonic]

Aww, Jami, that brought tears to my eyes. So happy to hear you're doing better and that you're getting support and help from your church, and that you're not so overwhelmed anymore. And that's so sweet that the church ladies thanked you for reaching out to them!

 

[jamilea]

Hey Cat! Maybe I should put disclaimers for people needing Kleenex lolol

My Dad and his side of the family are from Wisconsin. My grandma, grandpa, aunts, cousins and stuff are there. I have not seen them in forever. It's because my mom divorced my dad when I was 4 and I didn't see him again until I was 19. He said we can go there sometime and visit everyone. Maybe I can come see you!

 

[Cat-a-Tonic]

Where in WI does your family live? I'm in Madison. Drop me a line if you're ever in this neck of the woods, we can eat some plain rice and have an Ensure together, ha ha

 

[dustydshook]

Jamilea, I am also in MD send me a message as to where you are located and If we are in the same county, which is cecil. I can get you all the info you need. We even have a bus that will come out to your house. Its called "The Bus" ha ha. I am going to union hospital and University of Md both of which has assistance programs that will help with the bills. I hope I can help.

 

[jamilea]

Ha ha! Uhm I have to ask my dad which part. I'm not really sure.

Oooh rice sounds good right now. You know I found that cooking rice in a casserole dish in the microwave is the BEST!

 

[dustydshook]

what town i can tell you if you r in my county

 

[jamilea]

I am in Anne Arundel County

 

[dustydshook]

Ah ok, that is quite a ways from me. Sorry I couldn't help. I know all the ins and outs of Cecil but don't know anything about Anne Arundel.

 

[jamilea]

That's okay. It was nice of your thoughts to help :hug:

Namaste to you as well. I spent some time in India.

 

[dustydshook]

A dream trip for me, that I am afraid I will never get to take. But maybe someday!

 

[jamilea]

Do little bits at a time, trust me lol I was there for 2 weeks and had to come home early. I have some very very fond memories but so many more sad memories that are hard to talk about.

 

[dreamintwilight]

Jami - Glad you could connect with some of the ladies in your church and you are feeling better about tackling all the medical stuff. Sometimes asking for help is the hardest part, but then you realize there are people that are more than willing to help!