So fed up, sick and tired, can't see any light at the end

[SilverWillow]

Hi everyone,

I just don't know what to do. I'm going through my third flare up of crohns in as many years and my timing couldn't have been more terrible!

I'm a student nurse on my final placement, I qualify next month and i'm in the process of applying for jobs. I had an interview last week and I managed to get through it ok, they called me back for a second interview, which is tomorrow! During the past week or so my crohns has got much worse.

Before I was getting severe pain and having to run to the loo immediatley, and now I've got nausea all the time and have been vomiting, I have no appetite and can't even be tempted by my favourite nibbles. I have no energy and seem to burst into tears at the slightest thing.

I'm supposed to start back on placement tomorrow after a weeks holiday and I honestly don't know how i'm gonna get through my remaining shifts, not to mention my job interview tomorrow afternoon!

And my poor boyfriend....it's his birthday today and he's spent most of it sat with me while I vomit and clutch my stomach....probably not quite the party he had in mind.

To add to it i've just made a complete tit of myself on the phone to the IBD specialist nurse. She rang me back and asked me what was wrong and I started explaining then before I knew it I couldn't speak because I was crying down the phone to her - feel like an idiot.

I'd be happy if they'd give me something for the pain - does anyone on here know of any effective painkillers for CD? Some anti sickness pills wouldn't go amiss either!

I just want to be back to my normal self and have my life back

xx

 

[My Butt Hurts]

Awww, sorry your having a crappy time of it. Welcome to the forum though.
I'm sure your boyfriend would rather spend time with you when you're sick than not see you at all.
I don't have experience with pain killers or anti-vomit, but a friend of mine uses phenegren (sp) for vomiting and he says it works really well.
If you search on here for pain killers you might find some helpful answers.
Don't feel bad for crying to the nurse either. We've all been there. They are used to it too. It's okay.

 

[Guest]

hi SW, aw you poor thing! i wonder if it's no coincidence that your Crohn's has flared just when you didn't want it to.. sometimes stress, particularly over important forthcoming events, can trigger it into action.

regarding anti sickness meds.. have you tried Stemetil? not sure what it's called in other countries, but i'm assuming you're in the UK. also maybe an antispasmodic might help instead of or as well as painkillers. try to keep off ibruprofen and aspirin if you can, try paracetamol based ones.

hope you feel better soon! your gp or your consultant should be actively helping you to manage the symptoms medicine-wise! if they're not, maybe you need to insist on more help from them!

 

[SilverWillow]

Thanks guys, the nurse rang bad shortly after I posted with an appointment for me to see my consultant on friday morning, so that's something at least. And she told me to increase my steroids to 40mg.

Thanks for the suggestions regarding painkillers and anti sickness meds, I'm going to discuss it with the doc friday (providing he listens to me this time). I've just got a new consultant you see, my first one who I was with since diagnosis left to work at another hospital, and he was brilliant. I'm gutted he's gone.

I just want the pain to go away

 

[Jerman]

Thanks guys, the nurse rang bad shortly after I posted with an appointment for me to see my consultant on friday morning, so that's something at least. And she told me to increase my steroids to 40mg.

Thanks for the suggestions regarding painkillers and anti sickness meds, I'm going to discuss it with the doc friday (providing he listens to me this time). I've just got a new consultant you see, my first one who I was with since diagnosis left to work at another hospital, and he was brilliant. I'm gutted he's gone.

I just want the pain to go away

Hi SW and welcome to the forum. When I had my first "flareup" back in March I was consistently hitting a 10 out of 10 on the pain scale and required ER intervention 5 times, once by ambulance. I was going through pain killer like they were candy and still experiencing unbearable pain. I was switched from percocet to vicodin to toradol- each with a minimal impact on the pain.

My Doc switched me to Nortryptaline and Bentyl and it has cut the pain in half for the most part. I can still hit some high numbers on the pain scale and am certainly not "better" yet but at least its not 24/7 pain. I hope that you are feeling much better soon, take good care.

 

[imisspopcorn]

Hi, sorry to hear you are feeling so bad. I have been an RN since 1992. Luckily I didn't have Crohn's during nursing school. I know how demanding the shifts can be especially when things get "explosive". Phenergan(promethegan) supposotories helped me with nausea but once I am on the vomitting roller coaster they didn't do much to stop it. As soon as there was a slight feeling of nausea (if I took them right away) they did help. I hope everything goes well for you. Don't ever worry about crying...its part of life. Every person who works in health care has had to comfort distraught patients.

 

[farm]

Stick in there silver. Crohns sucks, but look forward to remission! I hope it comes soon for you!

 

[beth]

Hope the interview went okay and good luck with the doc!

 

[Procyon]

Aww, sorry you're having such a rough time. Trying to get any kind of job, but especially a nursing one I'd imagine, is difficult if you're feeling sick. Welcome to the forums though, I'm sure you'll find plenty of useful info.

 

[SilverWillow]

Thanks everyone, I feel better just having this forum to post on, don't feel quite so lonely in all this.

Today was my first shift back on the ward in 9 days (It was planned leave, but lucky me managed to get sick during my time off) and I made a complete idiot of myself as usual. My mentor and other staff all know about my condition and are cool with it, if I run off there is a silent understanding of where i've gone. Today was bad. Ended up vomiting again in the end after having my well deserved cup of tea at break.

I feel like a freak. In my head i'm screaming at myself to just be normal and downright refusing to be sick until I absolutlely have to. Ended up in tears again, this time on the ward and a couple of patients saw. I felt so unprofessional for letting it get to me like that at work. I wonder if its the prednisolone making me so teary, or if it's just down to me being fed up. I think it's probably both.

Can't wait to see what doc says friday. The interview went fairly smoothly, I managed to refrain from running to the loo for an hour. I don't think i've got the job though, as there were people far more experienced than me being interviewed. I'll find out tomorrow.

Nite xx

 

[forum contributor]

That's great, SW!
Were you tired after your first shift back?
Let us know what the dr. says tomorrow!

 

[SilverWillow]

Success! I have been to see the doc and he has prescribed me cyclizine which seems to be taking the edge off my nausea so i'm a happy bunny about that, and he's also given me codeine, which I graciously accepted because for one I want the diarrhoea to stop and two i'm in pain and over the counter remedies aren't touching it.
I took the codeine on the bus home and by them time I got home I was so spaced out! I was late for my shift because I wasn't safe to drive! So now I am only taking the codeine before bed. This way I get a full nights sleep because the pain doesn't wake me!
He gave me more prednisolone, reducing dose starting from 40mg......etc and seems to think my sickness is a side effect of aza and says it should go of its own accord. I have to see him again in 6 weeks, if my sickness and pain haven't subsided by then he wants me to have a barium meal to look at my small bowel. At the moment I am only diagnosed as having crohns in my large bowel. Fingers crossed i'll be ok next time I see him

I was tired after my shift but it wasn't as bad as I thought it's be. Being there took my mind off it a bit.

Job wise i've been offered casual work once I qualify at a retirement village just up the road from me. It's perfect in a way because I can pick my shifts to suit me - a godsend if i'm still unwell! Hopefully when i'm in remission I can get something permanent in the hospital i'm training in now.
Xx

 

[SilverWillow]

Just wanted to say thanks for your support everyone

I'm feeling better, I wouldn't say i'm in remission yet but i'm heading that way. I still have to pop the occasional cyclizine/codeine, but i'm not depedant on them anymore and i'm taking nowhere near my prescribed dose.

I have finished my final placement and I have been offered a permanent job as staff nurse on coronary care, which is where I wanted to work. I had a placement there and loved every second!

So I'm much less stressed out now, which will have a positive effect on the bowel department me thinks!

Thanks! xx

 

[Guest]

hi again how lovely to read a positive post from you.. you've come a long way since you first posted good luck with the new placement, and also with keeping the symptoms at bay!

i think having something like Crohn's brings an element of depression anyway, without considering the other factors like how it affects our work & personal lives... thankfully you're feeling better, have something new and nice to look forward to, and it sounds like your happy gene is on its way back

 

[imisspopcorn]

Congratulations on your new position. We need more nurses who understand this disease first hand. Hope everything goes well for you.

 

[SilverWillow]

Thanks guys I'm really excited about starting the job! x