My 21 year old son has been getting abdominal pain on and off for the last year and diarrhea every few months. He seems to also have flu like symptoms most of the time. Tonight he vomited but i don't know if that was from drinking last night. He has also been getting a lot of headaches and shoulder pain. He has been to the doctor a few times but no tests were done not even blood. I think the doctor thought he just wanted time off work. My daughter has crohns so to me these symptoms point to IBD. . I'm so worried. It's bad enough having one child with crohns. How do i convince him to let me go doctors with him?
Worried about my son
- Thread starter upsetmom
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So sorry to hear that.
Does your son still have his gallbladder.
Just wondering. I have symptoms like that but I have gallstones.
My gallbladder will be removed soon.
The pain travels to under my right shoulder.
As far as convincing a 21 year old to do something, I know not.
I'm just happy if I can convince my 5 yr. old boy to do something.
I hope things get figured out.
Does your son still have his gallbladder.
Just wondering. I have symptoms like that but I have gallstones.
My gallbladder will be removed soon.
The pain travels to under my right shoulder.
As far as convincing a 21 year old to do something, I know not.
I'm just happy if I can convince my 5 yr. old boy to do something.
I hope things get figured out.
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Hope you manage to get to the doctors with your son. I can understand your worry if your daughter has Crohns already! At least if they do some basic tests then you can stop worrying or get him some treatment. It would be worth your son (or you) asking if he can at least do the faecal calprotectin test to measure inflammation levels. It is the only test that showed anything for my son, plus it's easy to do and doesn't hurt!
Those symptoms could be caused by lots of different things including drinking to excess and then withdrawal. Not that I'm saying that's what it is. Just that there's lots of possible explanations and you might not want to jump to any conclusions.
Hope his appointment goes well and don't be too disappointed if he won't let you go or makes you wait in the waiting room. Got a teenaged boy of my own and we are negotiating those waters already.
All the best.
Hope his appointment goes well and don't be too disappointed if he won't let you go or makes you wait in the waiting room. Got a teenaged boy of my own and we are negotiating those waters already.
All the best.
I understand that this must be really difficult. I have a 19 year old, and luckily thusfar, he's fine with me coming to the doctor with him, and he has signed releases so that doctors will speak to me. Not knowing your son, he may or may not ok you coming to the doctor's apt. Is it possible for you to negotiate to come in to the exam room for the first 5 minutes or the last 5 minutes? If not, perhaps could persuade your son to mention the family history and ask for some screening blood work- cbc, c reactive protein.
Since many people are fatigued and have various aches and pains, doctors often don't take notice unless there are red flags by history (fevers, blood in stool, weight loss), physical exam or labs (anemia, increased inflammatory markers...). This is why it is so difficult for people with IBD and normal blood work to get the diagnostic tests (endoscopy) needed to get a diagnosis.
[The doctor at my son's school said his symptoms were most likely stress. I asked her to check some blood work; it was only when he was found to be anemic and have a CRP that the doctor thought there might be something to investigate. Even the gastroenterologist said sounds like IBS so I interrupted and said, "but you don't see anemia and elevated CRP in IBS, do you?" He then recommended an endoscopy which showed Crohn's. ]
Hopefully, your son doesn't have IBD, but considering the possibility is a good idea.
Since many people are fatigued and have various aches and pains, doctors often don't take notice unless there are red flags by history (fevers, blood in stool, weight loss), physical exam or labs (anemia, increased inflammatory markers...). This is why it is so difficult for people with IBD and normal blood work to get the diagnostic tests (endoscopy) needed to get a diagnosis.
[The doctor at my son's school said his symptoms were most likely stress. I asked her to check some blood work; it was only when he was found to be anemic and have a CRP that the doctor thought there might be something to investigate. Even the gastroenterologist said sounds like IBS so I interrupted and said, "but you don't see anemia and elevated CRP in IBS, do you?" He then recommended an endoscopy which showed Crohn's. ]
Hopefully, your son doesn't have IBD, but considering the possibility is a good idea.
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upsetmom, you're right in that once you have a child with crohns, it is so easy to jump to that conclusion when another child is sick! 
My son has crohns and I do have to make a conscious effort to not assume that every symptom my daughter portrays means crohns! :yfaint:
On the other hand, it is always good to check... if it seems that your son's symptoms continue, perhaps you can 'compromise' and suggest that you just attend the doctor's apptmt to clarify family history of crohns and request that, at least, certain basic tests be ordered (ie bloodwork, calprotectin, etc.) and leave him to the rest of the appointment.
Must be hard when you're worried and they want to deal with it on their own! :ghug:
My son has crohns and I do have to make a conscious effort to not assume that every symptom my daughter portrays means crohns! :yfaint: On the other hand, it is always good to check... if it seems that your son's symptoms continue, perhaps you can 'compromise' and suggest that you just attend the doctor's apptmt to clarify family history of crohns and request that, at least, certain basic tests be ordered (ie bloodwork, calprotectin, etc.) and leave him to the rest of the appointment.
Must be hard when you're worried and they want to deal with it on their own! :ghug:
Well my son went to the doctor by himself, before he left i said tell the doctor your sister has crohns ( i even wrote it down so he didn't forget the name ) and ask for a blood test . When he got home he told me the doctor said it was a virus and to go back tomorrow if the pain was still there. HE DIDN'T ASK FOR A BLOOD TEST OR TELL HIM ABOUT HIS SISTER :mad2::mad2::mad2:
What makes me mad is this is the second time in two weeks he's been and the doctor has not ordered any tests .
What makes me mad is this is the second time in two weeks he's been and the doctor has not ordered any tests .
DustyKat
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Oh man, this is a really hard one upsetmom.
As you know both of my children have Crohn's. I don't know if you are aware of Matt's story but he was diagnosed about 4 years after Sarah. He was 17 at the time so obviously younger than your son. My son had only been unwell for 1 week and even then the symptoms were very mild. If Sarah didn't have Crohn's I would not have contacted the doctor. I told Matt that I was going to ask to doctor to do bloods and we would go from there. As it was he had an elevated CRP that was further increased when tested again one week later and he was then diagnosed the following week. So two weeks from start to finish.
I am in the position of knowing the GP on both a personal and professional level so it was easy for me to catch him at work and ask for a blood request to be done. With your son being the age he is you well know that you have many boundaries you are crossing.
Do you know his doctor at all?
I know he is an adult and his privacy needs to be respected and I practice that with my own children but if I was in your position I would be lying if I said I would do nothing and leave it to him. Like you I would be telling him what he needs to say to the doctor, if he chooses to ignore that then that is where the water muddies. Do you continue to 'nag' or do you say something to the doctor? The correct answer would be you say nothing to the doc but in the real world nothing is ever that black and white and so the moral dilemma sets in.
I think what I would do next is ask him why he said nothing about his sister. If he has no real response to that than I would explain to him about your fears and concerns, be open, honest and heartfelt and ask him if he minded if you rang and spoke with the doctor about his sister and Crohn's. Might be worth a try???
Dusty. xxx
As you know both of my children have Crohn's. I don't know if you are aware of Matt's story but he was diagnosed about 4 years after Sarah. He was 17 at the time so obviously younger than your son. My son had only been unwell for 1 week and even then the symptoms were very mild. If Sarah didn't have Crohn's I would not have contacted the doctor. I told Matt that I was going to ask to doctor to do bloods and we would go from there. As it was he had an elevated CRP that was further increased when tested again one week later and he was then diagnosed the following week. So two weeks from start to finish.
I am in the position of knowing the GP on both a personal and professional level so it was easy for me to catch him at work and ask for a blood request to be done. With your son being the age he is you well know that you have many boundaries you are crossing.
Do you know his doctor at all?
I know he is an adult and his privacy needs to be respected and I practice that with my own children but if I was in your position I would be lying if I said I would do nothing and leave it to him. Like you I would be telling him what he needs to say to the doctor, if he chooses to ignore that then that is where the water muddies. Do you continue to 'nag' or do you say something to the doctor? The correct answer would be you say nothing to the doc but in the real world nothing is ever that black and white and so the moral dilemma sets in.
I think what I would do next is ask him why he said nothing about his sister. If he has no real response to that than I would explain to him about your fears and concerns, be open, honest and heartfelt and ask him if he minded if you rang and spoke with the doctor about his sister and Crohn's. Might be worth a try???
Dusty. xxx
Dusty
MY son goes to the same medical centre as us but sees any doctor where we only see the same one and have become good friends with. So my plan is ( i know this might be a horrible thing to do ) when i see my doctor tell him to go his record and write down that his sister has crohns and hopefully the next doctor will take more notice .. thats the best i can think of i just can't sit back and do nothing.
MY son goes to the same medical centre as us but sees any doctor where we only see the same one and have become good friends with. So my plan is ( i know this might be a horrible thing to do ) when i see my doctor tell him to go his record and write down that his sister has crohns and hopefully the next doctor will take more notice .. thats the best i can think of i just can't sit back and do nothing.
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This is the very reason why my child is not allowed to get older than 8.
As a mum to young adult offspring, I agree.. Do what ya gotta do!!
HD
HD
crohnsinct
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When you bring your child to the doc for the first time they don't ask for birth certificates....just sayin....
MLP: Meet my 12 year old son...
Doc: Really? At what age did he start growing facial hair?
When they age out of that practice...new doc!
MLP: Meet my 12 year old son...
Doc: Really? At what age did he start growing facial hair?
When they age out of that practice...new doc!
Still worried about my son. He wasn't too bad for a few days but he's sick again he's also been complaining of his whole body aching for the last few weeks. Well he has finally agreed to go doctors with me tomorrow . So hopefully we get some answers soon.
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Hugs hope you get to the bottom of it
crohnsinct
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Good luck!
I thought l'd update this.
My son has still been sick on and off...He finally went back to the Dr today and this is what he said.... my sister has crohn's and l sometimes get stomach pain so my mum wants me to have some tests done...:yfaint:.. Never mentioned the diarrhea or vomiting. The DR said to him if the blood test comes back normal..... that he could still have crohn's...Well l already know this but l'm glad he told him otherwise he'll say the blood is normal so l don't need any more tests done.
I'm not quite sure what blood test the DR ordered .... I'll ask him to get a copy of the results.. then l can do some research..
My son has still been sick on and off.
..He finally went back to the Dr today and this is what he said.... my sister has crohn's and l sometimes get stomach pain so my mum wants me to have some tests done...:yfaint:.. Never mentioned the diarrhea or vomiting. The DR said to him if the blood test comes back normal..... that he could still have crohn's...Well l already know this but l'm glad he told him otherwise he'll say the blood is normal so l don't need any more tests done.I'm not quite sure what blood test the DR ordered .... I'll ask him to get a copy of the results.. then l can do some research..
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Bloods test was normal. DR wants to retest in 3 months.
I felt like a detective last night.:lol:..I found out he's going toilet about once every 5 or 6 days and its either normal or diarrhea...I told him that's not normal and to make sure he tells the DR....but he didn't.
Why do they have to grow up and not listen to a word we say!!!
I felt like a detective last night.:lol:..I found out he's going toilet about once every 5 or 6 days and its either normal or diarrhea...I told him that's not normal and to make sure he tells the DR....but he didn't.
Why do they have to grow up and not listen to a word we say!!!
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So ridiculous! I can understand not wanting to discuss your son's issues but where is the harm in simply 'receiving' info from you?? But, my mom ran into similar issues with my dad's dr and she also just wanted to 'share' info, not obtain it.
I'm sure your son is aware of issues but, perhaps, one more candid conversation might help. I know I've found that my kids might shrug off what I say at the moment but, later, I have seen actions that show they actually heard some of what I said (sometimes!).
I'm sure your son is aware of issues but, perhaps, one more candid conversation might help. I know I've found that my kids might shrug off what I say at the moment but, later, I have seen actions that show they actually heard some of what I said (sometimes!
).
DustyKat
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Good grief upsetmom! 5 or 6 days!
Ugh, I can well imagine the brick walls you have come up against!
I have not had to do this but should it arise I would say something like this and say it in my best Matron's voice. :lol:...
Them: I'm sorry I can't discuss your son's health issues with you due to his age. It would be a breach of confidentiality.
Me: Fine, now that I have allowed you your explanation you can listen to mine.
Firstly, whilst I more than appreciate the position you are in and don't expect you to disclose anything to me it does not stop you from accepting information from me and failure to pass that information onto the doctor would be a lack of duty of care on your part.
Secondly, I have a daughter with Crohn's disease and I am more than concerned that my son may also have this disease. Now until you have walked a mile in my shoes do not judge me nor my motives. I have lived this disease in every possible sense of the word for some time now and until you or the doctor can tell me something I don't know about Crohn's Disease then you will listen to what I have to say.
Dusty.
Ugh, I can well imagine the brick walls you have come up against!
I have not had to do this but should it arise I would say something like this and say it in my best Matron's voice. :lol:...
Them: I'm sorry I can't discuss your son's health issues with you due to his age. It would be a breach of confidentiality.
Me: Fine, now that I have allowed you your explanation you can listen to mine.
Firstly, whilst I more than appreciate the position you are in and don't expect you to disclose anything to me it does not stop you from accepting information from me and failure to pass that information onto the doctor would be a lack of duty of care on your part.
Secondly, I have a daughter with Crohn's disease and I am more than concerned that my son may also have this disease. Now until you have walked a mile in my shoes do not judge me nor my motives. I have lived this disease in every possible sense of the word for some time now and until you or the doctor can tell me something I don't know about Crohn's Disease then you will listen to what I have to say.
Dusty.
crohnsinct
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Wow Dusty! I am so proud of you! Not one cuss word and no name calling. You are evolving!
I am printing that out for when O gets older.
I am printing that out for when O gets older.
