Been awhile, but here I am again

[skymgirl]

I've been away from message boards for awhile, I was still flaring, and for me, sometimes talking about it too much can cause me to be really depressed. But I wanted to vent this morning, and I figure this is the place to do it, since you guys understand.

I've never really stopped flaring since my diagnosis last year. (It's almost my year anniversary, only 5 days away.) For me my flare involves severe constipation, and it's really put a damper on my life. I started missing time from work recently because of a lot of pain and needing to be in the bathroom for a few hours each day, so I headed back to my GI two weeks ago. She ordered a CT scan, so last night I drank the yucky barium, and I drank down another bottle this morning.

I get to the imaging center and - surprise - the machine is broken! So they don't know if I can have my test today. After I drank two bottles of barium that have left me feeling like I'm going to puke, and I took the day off from work! :ymad: They told me to call back at 1pm and they'll have a better idea of what's going on. So now on top of stressing out about the test, I'm feeling sick (crampy and really noisy intestines right now, too) and I'm nervous about having to miss another day of work. I have the sick time I can use, but my boss doesn't understand much about Crohn's because I also have Celiac disease, so all he pays attention to is the fact that I can't eat pizza like he does. (When I told him I needed today off for my test he said 'why do you need a test, i thought as long as you don't eat pizza you're ok?')

I guess I'm also stressing because my GI told me that pending results of this test Humira will probably be the way to go, and I'm scared of that for all kinds of reasons.

Today is just an all kinds of bad day...I try to be positive and thankful that I could be doing much worse, but today is one of those days where I'm worried, stressed, feeling sick and anxious, and just hate this disease. :depressed:

Thanks for letting me vent.

 

[imisspopcorn]

That really stinks Skymgirl! You must be so frustrated....I hope the Humira will be the medication that gets your flare under control....Good luck

 

[Rob]

That's gotta suck
I hope that they get the ct machine fixed soon

 

[Jennifer]

I feel for you. I can't stand barium. I don't know why they make people drink so much of it in the first place. When I was young, I hated the taste so whenever my parents walked out of the room, I'd pour like half of it down the sink. Test always worked just fine.

I hope you don't have to miss work again.

And it drives me freaken bonkers when people say such ridiculous things about this disease. I just look at them as if they just threw up on themselves.

 

[Jer's Girl]

I know what you are going through Skymgirl. I'm having a pretty bad day myself, so we will just go through it together! Hope you are feeling better soon.

Crabbyrelish, I used to pour half of the barium down the sink too but my fiancé goes to all of my appointments with me now and he wont let me! That stuff is awful! I hope you can get the test out of the way Skymgirl. I would be devastated if I got there and couldn't take the test.

 

[Emkat8]

Wow your boss sounds like mine...lol. I'm sorry to hear all that you are going through. Just try to hang in there-things will get better!

 

[dreamintwilight]

That's rough. I would probably feel the same way.

I just started Humira today and was really anxious about taking it and did not like hearing the side effects, but am hoping it will just improve my quality of life Hopefully you will find the right meds to help you as well, Humira or not.

And I give you props for having to deal with a boss that ignorant, haha. I probably would have yelled at him out of pure frustration.

I hope things look up for you real soon. You deserve it And feel free to vent any time!