Frustrated with explaining crohn's

[J.Jewell5254]

Hello everyone. :sign0085:
My name is Jenny and I'm 19 years old. I am currently in a bad flare with the crohn's disease. However, I just received a remicade infusion yesterday morning, so I'm hoping on a few weeks of relief.
My problem is explaining to everyone what I have. It's so frustrating to me because I have friends and my boyfriend telling me everything I need to do. In fact, last night my boyfriend went on and on to me for over an hour about how I am causing my own flare because I don't do anything about my stress levels. He is right that I do have a lot of stress, and I need to lower it. BUT..to tell me I caused my own flare? And then he says if I got rid of all of my stress he guarantees I would never need surgery and he thinks I would be able to stop all medication... WHAT!? No no no.
Ugh. I'm just so frustrated. Am I really causing my own flare? And then after that, he complains because I don't want to drink alcohol with him anymore. I understand that living with someone who has a disease like this is difficult. Especially when the person is on prednisone. But...come on. I am just so sick of hearing that I'm no fun anymore. And pissing people off because I don't want to venture too far from my house or stay overnight anywhere while I'm flaring.
Sorry... I just needed to vent to those that understand. Thanks!

 

[DJW]

Hi Jenny.

Sorry you're dealing with this on top of flaring. If only curing crohns was a matter of dealing with stress better.
You're not causing this flare or your disease.

Sending you my support.

 

[alex_chris]

I am sorry Jenny that you have to deal with this stuff and I agree, what your boyfriend is telling you isn't cool. Not sure how I would deal in your situation. I assume he is also pretty young (you said you are 19). Complaining that you don't want to get drunk with him is a jerk statement, if you ask me... no matter if you have Crohn's or not.

All I can say is, sometimes it helps to take a deep breath and think about that things could be worse (I know, it is weird to say that, but we all live in Western countries, have medicine available to us, aren't going hungry or live in the cold etc.).

One other thing to think about would be is to change how you are currently managing your Crohn's. It seems you are on pred and remicade. Are you tapering off the pred right now? Are you having symptoms or are you currently in long term remission? Have you figured out a good diet that works for you or tried endurance sport? Sometimes, it's some of the basics in Crohn's management that help a lot - and also help in ignoring people that don't really understand what Crohn's is or how to manage it.