Help me

[jaymo]

Hey my boyfriend (well now ex boyfriend ) has crohns disease. He broke up with me on sat. On fri night he started being funny with me on the phone and he said he wasnt feeling well as i new from before when he feels like this he gets depessed and pushes people away. He has only had crohns for a year and he says he is really depressed and bitter as he is worried about what the future may hold and also cz he cant do the same things he done before. Anyways i got off the phone to me on fri and on sat when he phoned he still sounded depressed and he said he couldnt meet me as he wasnt well. He also said he was annoyed cause i told him the night before that i was stuggling with money and he was worried i would say at the last min i couldnt go on hol in the summer. He was basically picking at everything on the phone to me all silly things he cut off so i left him be as i new he was annoyed cz he wasnt well and was taking out his anger at me. Then he started texting me saying if things where gonna b like this he couldnt do it anymore. I asked what he meant and he said are relationship was shit. Then he went on to text to say it was over and that where not meant to b together. I left him till two days later to calm down and he is still saying it. He would always have silly fights with me its as if he just tries to push everything away from him cz hes scared and upset.. Like he mayb ended it cz he was being horrible to me and he new id mayb leave him. I just wanna know is it cause of crohns his behavour is like this? i dont wanna give up on 7 months esp since the day before all this he said to me we where right togeher. Im the only one that new indept how he felt hes confided in me loads about being depressed and ive told hime to get help, could any of yous help me plz xxxx

 

[SarahBear]

Hi, jaymo.

Crohn's alone doesn't cause these issues - but any chronic medical condition can lead to depression, which does. It sounds like he needs to see a doctor about these issues.

It might also help to direct him to this forum. He might feel alone in dealing with his health - coming here and talking with others going through the same situation can make a big difference.

I hope things work out soon!

 

[Susan2]

Is he on any medication? A number of the medications can make the depression and feelings of low self-worth worse. Also the vitamin deficiencies that come with Crohn's can have the same effect.

 

[Ya noy]

I'm really sorry Jaymo. There's a number of reasons he might be pushing you away. Is he on any medications that could be making him depressed or irrational? Because from what you've described sounds a lot like the way my husband is taking prednisone.

He might also feel be feeling somewhat hopeless, like what's the point of being in a relationship if he's going to be ill, and can't give you what he thinks you want or need. He might be afraid you'll eventually see him as a burden and leave, so it's better for him to break it off with you now.

I don't think having those types of thoughts and feelings are exclusive to Crohn's, but rather can result from almost any type of severe depression.

I. Hope things get better for you soon.

 

[Hobbes650]

Is he on any medication? A number of the medications can make the depression and feelings of low self-worth worse. Also the vitamin deficiencies that come with Crohn's can have the same effect.

Ditto what Susan2 said. If he's taking Prednisone, that drug can certainly cause some personality changes, but those are temporary. The first time I was on Pred at the age of 18, my mother didn't recognize me- my room was spotless and all my underwear and socks were nicely folded in my dresser!

But then there's that other side we don't like. The side that gets very irritable and upset at even the slightest little thing. This time around on Pred I've been very mindful of that side, but even so you don't want to keep me on hold for over 10 minutes. :voodoo:

I am sorry to hear you're having to deal with this. His health will improve and hopefully sooner rather than later. In the meantime, hang in there is all you can really do.