- Joined
- Apr 1, 2011
- Messages
- 73
hi, excuse the vent.
I dont know how to deal with being on my own for extended periods of time.
Just curious as to how others deal with this situation?, I know im not the only one. I dont have a job and rarely feel able to go far outside, the whole idea of going out and socialising is comical at best at the moment plus on top of this, since meds ive managed to grow a "lovely" facial cyst on my cheek, which I should say looks almost big enough to draw a tiny face on.
Facing seeing people from my town who I used to work around and having to explain the big lump on my face, the weight loss, why I look that little bit more like a homeless person/why I stopped working/ why I dont have a job, makes me feel very nervous. Also I get very bored of having to explain. Ive always been skinny and Crohns really doesnt help so much on that front nor does the slimness aid the cyst(It kinda makes it poke out YAY). In effect I think im becoming a bit of a shut in.
My relationship with my GF of ten years is strained, we dont care any less about one another, there is just so little of our relationship that doesnt fall within the shadow of Crohns, over the last 3 years as Crohns has become more demonstrative Ive lost touch with pretty much everyone else I knew, socialising hasnt been a reality for some time. Ive lost all my close friends and dont feel comfortable around people any more so obviously meeting new people is gonna be pretty tough.
Im in a situation now wherein my gf wont be around for a month or so(family holiday). Ive pretty much flaked out the last few times shes been away for a week or so at a time so im imagining in advance this is gonna be pretty spesh, I could really benefit from being able to study but have found my ability to learn somewhat diminished by my inability to focus and I feel like ive pretty much given up on studying while I still feel bad all the time, I know this is pathetic but balancing my sanity short term rather than always living for 2/3 years time had to be done, or at least thats how it seems. Ive been typing and re typing this for pretty much the entire duration of "hobo with a shotgun"(which is a very silly film btw) trying to post something that doesnt make me sound as weak as perhaps im being, nor so devoid of emotion I fail to convey how much this has and is bothering me. Lacking people In rl to get this off my chest at I choose the internets
any advice on how to force concentration or anything that serves as a massive engrossing time sink will be appreciated. ty
I dont know how to deal with being on my own for extended periods of time.
Just curious as to how others deal with this situation?, I know im not the only one. I dont have a job and rarely feel able to go far outside, the whole idea of going out and socialising is comical at best at the moment plus on top of this, since meds ive managed to grow a "lovely" facial cyst on my cheek, which I should say looks almost big enough to draw a tiny face on.
Facing seeing people from my town who I used to work around and having to explain the big lump on my face, the weight loss, why I look that little bit more like a homeless person/why I stopped working/ why I dont have a job, makes me feel very nervous. Also I get very bored of having to explain. Ive always been skinny and Crohns really doesnt help so much on that front nor does the slimness aid the cyst(It kinda makes it poke out YAY). In effect I think im becoming a bit of a shut in.
My relationship with my GF of ten years is strained, we dont care any less about one another, there is just so little of our relationship that doesnt fall within the shadow of Crohns, over the last 3 years as Crohns has become more demonstrative Ive lost touch with pretty much everyone else I knew, socialising hasnt been a reality for some time. Ive lost all my close friends and dont feel comfortable around people any more so obviously meeting new people is gonna be pretty tough.
Im in a situation now wherein my gf wont be around for a month or so(family holiday). Ive pretty much flaked out the last few times shes been away for a week or so at a time so im imagining in advance this is gonna be pretty spesh, I could really benefit from being able to study but have found my ability to learn somewhat diminished by my inability to focus and I feel like ive pretty much given up on studying while I still feel bad all the time, I know this is pathetic but balancing my sanity short term rather than always living for 2/3 years time had to be done, or at least thats how it seems. Ive been typing and re typing this for pretty much the entire duration of "hobo with a shotgun"(which is a very silly film btw) trying to post something that doesnt make me sound as weak as perhaps im being, nor so devoid of emotion I fail to convey how much this has and is bothering me. Lacking people In rl to get this off my chest at I choose the internets
any advice on how to force concentration or anything that serves as a massive engrossing time sink will be appreciated. ty
