Making commitments?

[housemouse]

Hi everyone, I am still a newbie I suppose because I don't post on here very often. However, I'm having some trouble right now.

I was in the hospital in September 2012, and then again last week for a small bowel obstruction. I've been on Remicade since September and my doctors are kind of perplexed about why I had another obstruction. They think it's scarring that is causing the narrowing of my small intestines, causing the blockage (meaning possible surgery).

Anyways what I am actually having a problem with is making commitments. I work part time in an office (8-5, MWF) and on my days off I volunteer in a Psychology lab at a local university. This last quarter I had to miss a couple of days of lab and work because I was either sick, getting my Remicade, or like recently, in the hospital. I do my best to juggle everything in my life but it's really hard to make it work sometimes. With my insurance, sometimes the appointment times are really limited so I will be forced to take off work or lab for all of them.

Yesterday, my lab manager expressed concern in my health and how working in the lab might be affecting that (and how my health is affecting the lab). Basically what I'm concerned with right now is making these commitments given my current state and I know I have a lot of upcoming doctors appointments, and tests.

I really don't want to stop doing something that I want to do because of my Crohn's or mental health (I recently started seeing a therapist for anxiety and that's a commitment of appointments every two weeks) but I feel like I need to be forth coming with my limitations.

 

[nogutsnoglory]

It's hard to make commitments but health comes first. I would have an open discussion explaining that there will be times you can't work but that you are invested in the project and hope to be better soon.

 

[GutlessWonder86]

Hi House,

I am a female Crohnie since the age of 12. I can so relate to trying to make commitments with jobs, volunteering, and even friends.

The last 2 years were pure hell for me as I had an open abdominal wound that wouldn't heal due to a different infection each month. THEN my doctor would put me on an IV antibiotic (FUN TIMES!!! NOT) only for me to have another infection. I really baffled my GI surgeon AND my infectious disease MD until I pulled out a green suture that was tied off and not attached to anything while I was cleaning the wound. I saved it and showed it to both doctors. THIS WAS THE CAUSE OF ALL MY TROUBLES after exploratory surgery for an abscess that wouldn't heal. They were like "it happens." I was like, WHY didn't it show up on the scans or sonograms??? would've saved me so much grief.

I pretty much stayed at home unless I had a medical appointment. My true friends who know me and my health issues would keep in touch via email, phone, or visits. They would even call the day before AND the day of to see if I was still up for company as the antibiotics wreaked havoc on my gut.

Back in Nov. I was diagnosed with dvts in both legs and was put on restrictions until I saw my hematologist in March. I am able to slowly start back with my walking, more involved house work, etc. My friends, again, were supportive and kept in touch. As for volunteering, I gave the supervisor a heads up that I could still do ostomy visitations but would need a chair to sit on with another to elevate the legs. She was very understanding and even told me that if my legs were hurting the day of my visitation, I could call her and another member of the support group would come in.

I've learned over the years to just take it one day at a time. If friends and family can't accept you for you or aren't willing to compromise (I did that ALOT), then they aren't worth your time. Focus on those who truly matter and are ALWAYS there for you.

As for work, you can check out the wiki here or CCFA.org to see what rights you have as an employee. We are protected by the Disability Act. You can't be fired for your IBD. BUT I learned that some places (at least where I live) can work around it and lie saying that they were doing lay offs unless you can absolutely prove beyond a reasonable doubt that it was due to your health.

This disease is a pain in the butt. I wish you all the best.
(((hugs))) ~GW