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Amberaut

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May 16, 2011
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Over a year ago I got a promotion. Been at this company for almost 5 years. Never had a problem with Crohns affecting my work until now. I have been flaring for weeks, and I'm exhausted. My direct boss is very kind but I hardly ever see him. The other managers, not so much. I have a very high stress job. They seem to punish me for missing work. No matter the reason. Last Friday when I was off for a colonoscopy they messed up all kinds of stuff and left it for me to clean up. I am struggling through each day best I can, but you can imagine how hard it is. And the meds are helping and kicking my butt at the same time!
I have told them what's up. They know how bad it is but they are *****. How do I deal with these people?
 
I had a situation like this last week. I had to take a day off to go to the doctor because I was in extreme pain and was miserable. I called my manager to let her know that I would not be in and I got the third degree :( as if I didn't feel bad enough. I know its hard to get people to cover shifts in a small store (I work retail) but geez what was I supposed to do. I could barely stand at that point. I ended up in emergency that evening on IV and pain meds, I was having a bad flare, still am. So that meant a few more days off...not the favorite of my co workers last week.

In any case its hard to deal with people who don't understand what you are going through, especially since our disease is hidden. People cannot see the effects of the disease for themselves so how can this person be so ill right? I've learned over the years to just try my best to look past the negativity of my co workers and just take care of myself. If I need time to heal then that's what I am going to do and if they don't like it well that's their problem. Work can always be caught up on, your health on the other hand needs to be looked after. So in answering your question on how to deal with these people, you did what you should have. You explained that you are sick and need time, so like I said if they don't understand that then it's their problem. There will come a day when they will be sick and will call upon you to be there for them. Just look after yourself is the best advice I can give, deal with the drama later.
 
You got fired because of your CD!? I would have gone straight to the labour board or got a lawyer! That's not right at all, definitely a case of wrongful dismissal.
 
I would go talk to your boss, esp if you have good relationship with him. When i started my job, I sat down and had a talk to him about it and how it would and can affect me. It really seemed to help.
 
I work in sales. With it being the end of the month, it gets very stressful. Today I left an hour early cause I felt so bad. No one seemed to care today. But I also found out that one of my co-workers had a talk with one of the managers about crohns. Her sister has it. I tried talking to them about it last week, but they only hear what they want to. Anyway, once she explained some of it to him, he was nicer today.
I don't want to get fired, or anything. But I am having such a hard time working. I started 6MP today and hope that's going to help. I just have to get through the next few weeks I guess and see what happens. I'll do the best I can.
 
Paislee said:
You got fired because of your CD!? I would have gone straight to the labour board or got a lawyer! That's not right at all, definitely a case of wrongful dismissal.
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Yes I got fired, they said it's a "work at will" state and you can get fired for any reason. He didn't hire a man because of the man's Disk Disease! I contacted over 30 lawyers they all said I had NO CASE! Wow I know right?

Was my first time having crohns symptoms and being diagnosed too!
 
Because I am at the moment undiagnosed i got a writen warning in work and punished for a year with no pay rise, lose of sick pay and down graded in my job. This was all because i was off three times in a 12 month period . Two of those times i was in hospital and unable to come to work. I was basically accused of lying because I was undiagnosed.
Not very nice when your trying to deal with this condition, deaf doctors and employers who basically dont care.
 
I an do sorry about your troubles at work. Guess I shouldn't complain yet. It's so hard to explain this. People hear what your saying, but they don't understand. And with so many symptoms, it's exhausting just trying to get through the day! My whole body hurts, back and neck pain. Plus my head is spinning. There is just so many things going on in my body right now.
What state do you live in? When I was diagnosed in 05 I worked at a very physical job and missed alot. They couldn't fire me for it Crohns. But they pushed me out. Honestly, once I got out of there, I did get better. I have been aty current employer for almost 5 years and this is the first time I have ever had to miss any more than a day or so, and ever because of Crohns.
 
I wanted to say that today turned out to be much better. I didn't get near as sick. I'm still exhausted, and my joints are killing me! But I made it through work and got everything caught up. When I headed out I could see a look of relief on some of the faces today. First day they have seen me walk out normally in weeks. I didn't have to drag myself out to car. Hoping tomorrow will be the same.
 
Check out the Family Medical Leave Act. If you have an HR person at your place of employment you can sign up and protect yourself.
 
Another thing you can do, but it may be difficult due to the economy, look for another place to work. My previous employer was very big, excellent benefits, pay, etc, but the environment was clearly detrimental to my health. |I could easily show them using the statistics they collected, and I could not get them to make accommodations. They were happier to see me get sick, go on sick leave, come back and start the cycle over. All they needed to do was set a schedule that would work. They could buy someone a $1000 chair to help their back, but wouldn't adjust a schedule. I left. Smartest thing I have done as an adult. Not easy - it has cost me a lot to make the change as I had to go back to school, but I have found that my Crohn's has really settled down since I made the change. Gone from surgery every two to four years to no real sign of a flare in almost 5.
 
I have already been looking looking around for somewhere else. I think this flare my have kept me from having a chance at another job. A girl I used to work with got on somewhere I would do really good at, and right when this all started again she had messaged me. Found out that they are currently hiring, but with my health being so uncertain, she probably didn't want to suggest me for a position. She hasn't been there a year yet, so I completely understand. There just aren't many jobs around here.
One person told me today to try to make my appointments during the week. Not on Fridays or Monday's cause that is when they need me the most. I assured him I will do my best. One more thing to add to the fire.
 
i was also fired during my flare ups.

they dismissed me cause they said they couldn't afford to keep me on.... 3 weeks later they were advertising for new staff and i realised i had been sacked because of my health.
 
That's just awful! I hate this. We try so hard to get better and people just don't care. I know I am very lucky to have what I have. But there should be better protection for workers.
 
Been having a flare for the last couple of weeks so haven't been any further then my house,
Returned to work today only to be guilt tripped by my boss. "it impacts the team, yar yar yar" Anyway our HR dept have now asked for my sickness record and I think I'm being targeted because I'm stopping my dept from "meeting the business's needs" when I go sick.
I'm sorry but what the hell, there are people who take the pi*s out of my company left right and centre but they still have their jobs!!! I have all sorts of letters from my GP, my specialist and the backing of the company doctor but that dosent seem to be good enough. Now I'm dreading going to work because I'm feeling abit
 
Been having a flare for the last couple of weeks so haven't been any further then my house,
returned to work today only to be guilt tripped by my boss. "it impacts the team, yar yar yar" Anyway our HR dept have now asked for my sickness record and I think I'm being targeted because I'm stopping my dept from "meeting the business's needs" when I go sick.
I'm sorry but what the hell, there are people who take the pi*s out of my company left right and centre but they still have their jobs!!! I have all sorts of letters from my GP, my specialist and the backing of the company doctor but that dosent seem to be good enough. Now I'm dreading going to work because I'm feeling abit of an outsider.
It's sad because I love my job and never let it show when I'm having a bad day, I just keep smiling and do what I do best. I put myself out for them all the time by changing shifts, staying late and coming in early but as soon as I have a flare I get the whole "the company will only do so much to support you" well start supporting me and stop putting me under more stress then is needed!!

Sorry to rant but I've had a really crap day, I still feel rubbish and now im really not looking forward to going in tomorow.
 
I'm worried my boyfriend is going to get fired. I can't remember the last week he spent 40 hours in the office, and some days he doesn't even make it til lunch. I'm really concerned with his absences, but don't know what to say because I can't understand his pain and sickness. He already lost one position due to absences, but parted on decent terms once he explained his condition and threatened to sue for wrongful termination. He's told me he wants me to "ride his ass" and make him come in the office (we work together) but I just don't know how much to push. I don't know if I should be kind and gentle, or be firm and nagging. I'm really lost on how to advise him, and all these stories of getting fired during flares are not putting my mind at ease. HALP!
 
Its a very difficult world we live in. People who aren't directly affected by CD (people with it or our direct famiky/friends) don't remember the constant struggle of trying to feel good. I had a situation at work when I was hospitalized for over a week and had emergency exploratory surgery because of a blockage when I was originally diagnosed...doctors advised me not to work until fully healed (6weeks) and I got calls every monday asking when I was coming back in.

Its very hard and something we will forever have to deal with. Stay strong. At the end of the day your health is the most important thing.

Have you talked to your boss?
 
Axelfl3333 said:
To all the Brits on this thread are your employers aware of the disability discrimination act?
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This is something I have been researching the past few weeks, and the Equality Act.

I have been signed off work sick past 3 weeks because my flare up finally kicked my ass. I've finished steroids etc it was just sheer exhaustion from working through 3 months of really bad flare. It got so I would sleep in the car at lunchtime, jumped out my skin everytime the phone rang, was shaking, sweating etc.

After I got out the doctors surgery 3 weeks ago, I called my supervisor to tell her. Her reaction completely astounded me. 'Well this isnt the greatest timing, you have this this and this to do.' 'I cant rely on you.' 'This has come out of the blue I thought you were getting better' (she's based almost 200 miles away from me, I dont even speak to her everyday). 'Whats going to happen long-term if I cant even count on you to come to work?'

I appreciate this stuff has to be asked, but NOT when I am crying on the phone through sheer tiredness and stress, and not with her bad attitude.

I'm back at work now and have a meeting with her and HR on Friday. I hate using the words 'entitled to' but I am throwing everything at her I can. I've joined the union and will take this company for everything they have if I have to.

I will not be treated like a silly little girl because I have a chronic disease.
 
I can relate to a lot of your situations. I studied law and obtained a law degree and an LPC (which is the professional qualification required to practice as a solicitor in the UK). I specialised in Employment Law and know all about the Equality Act. Despite this I have been fired, twice, in the space of 3 years due to flare ups of Crohns Disease. On both occasions I was working for law firms.

The problem is that a company will always be able to argue that they dismissed you on grounds of incapability to perform the job. Companies are only required to make 'reasonable adjustments' to accommodate our disability and Crohns Disease qualifies as a disability under the Equality Act. In my case, on both occassions, there were only two other people who were able to cover my caseload and as they were already working at maximum capacity, the company were entitled to dismiss me for a fair reason being that of capability.

I am also treated with suspicion by my colleagues whenever I am away from the office. The fact that Crohn's disease is an unseen disability really does have a substantial impact on how I am perceived, even by my close friends who often think that I am exaggerating and I am left with the choice of either being bluntly honest and embarrassing them, or shrugging it off and feeling humiliated. I usually chose the latter.

I think the worst thing is the idea that people see me as a shirker or a lier when in reality most of the time I have to work even harder just to avoid being fired, which clearly doesn't work...

Employment legislation is very weak in the UK and we are actually deemed to have the 4th weakest employment law in Europe. In addition, there is no longer any funding to bring a claim at an Employment Tribunal and I would have had to stump up £1,200 to try and enforce my rights and in all likelihood I would have been unsuccessful.

I have been unemployed for the last two months. My career is effectively over as employers now look at my record and when I tell them why I was dismissed from my last position they are sympathetic and then do not reply to my application. I have strong academics and a decent commercial track record but even if I was employed again, if I have another flare, I'd be sacked again.

I really feel like the system is against me, but it is so cathartic being able to rant in a forum where I know that people will be able to relate to my position :)
 
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Hi Joe,

That must be so hard, especially considering how hard you must have worked to get your degree etc, and knowing what you are capable of where work is concerned.

I totally get you when you say people see you as a shirker or a liar. Its something I'm very concerned about, i hate being seen as the one from work who is always off sick, who cant be relied on etc. I hate the thought that some people think we pull sickies just for the sake of a day off. I wish! I've been off work since my Seton surgery on 6th Jan, hopefully going back 26th Feb and i cant wait! Just a bit scared of the back to work meeting with my manager and HR. Also because there are a few others in my company with CD who don't suffer as much right now, i think everyone thinks I'm exaggerating.

Is there anything else you can do to keep yourself occupied or working when you're not flaring?
 
All, I can relate to all the post here. I applied for disability retirement and awaiting a decision. I have 25 years of federal service and I am constantly being harassed. I telework, I complete all my assignments on time and I also work on weekends which is require about every three (3) weeks. In my office we have many personnel teleworking, however, there seem to be a problem with me teleworking. I am being denied information, removed from distribution lists and they are fabricating allegations against me. I am an emotional wreck. I am currently seeing a Psychiatrist and Psychologist to try and handle the harassment. Once I was unable to work all the extra hours I was working they are trying to find an excuse to fire me. I asked to be move to another department, however, I was refused. They want to use me for all the difficult projects because I am the most experienced person in my department. I very unhappy in my work environment. This place is very toxic!
 
Aphrodite, I had a seton in place for about 2 years so I know how it can impact upon your ability to work. On a positive note I think that the seton had a positive impact upon my health and eventually allowed me to get onto infliximab which has been life changing. I hope it works out for you.

I also hear people at work saying "oh such and such has Crohns disease so we are aware of the impact that it has on you" as if to say if Crohns disease impacts me more severely than this other person then I am just putting it on...

At the end of the day there really is nothing that any of us can do about it. Ultimately businesses are there to maximise profit and the cold hard truth is that someone who has time off sick just isn't as profitable as an equally effective member of staff who does not have time off sick. When someone implies that we are exaggerating I think that, most of the time, they are just attempting to find a way to get rid of us, as Mychelle says above.

I think that the best option is to try and be philosophical about it. If my employer puts profit ahead of compassion then that's up to them. I will not be suing them, or making their life difficult when they sack me, but I will be very careful about how much I disclose to a new employer before they hire me. If employers are going to look after their own self interests then so am I!

While I'm off I have the attitude that if I cannot improve my financial position, or my career, then I will improve my health by working out, running and eating well. I will also try and improve my mind by reading, meditating and learning to play the guitar.

I'll keep trying though and it's relaxing spending time improving myself so, as long as I'm not bankrupt, I'll keep smiling!

Mychelle, I wish you luck obtaining retirement, it sounds like a good option if you can get it and your employer sounds like the typical greedy, unsympathetic type that we all have experience of! I guess it's impossible to show empathy if they have no understanding of our experiences.
 
So I have managed to stay at work now for a year without taking any official sick leave . I now use my holidays and save up the bank holidays too. Its not ideal but i can manage. Ive been flaring pretty bad now for about a month and had two ribs crack with no apparent reason. Very uncomfortable indeed. I decided to take a step back before telling any one as they know i get sick anyway and why give them more to talk about. So Im on more painkillers and not sleeping between going to the bathroom and not being able to lie down properly.
Employeers do not want to know so I aint going to tell them anymore . When it gets so bad that i cant go to work Im going to take extended time off and seek proper medical attention( which I dont believe im getting cause im still going to work )
I have often thought of going to a union and stirring things up but I have enough problems every day with creating more so ive decided to deal with it myself . Not ideal but I m happy enough at the moment.
 
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I am a Brit, and yes they are aware of the disability discrimination act. So far my employer has been pretty good, and my managers have been supportive. I have had 9 days off in December for a flare, where I was going 20 times with blood, and I nearly had to take time off this month. If you have sick notes and doctors notes, they cannot touch you. However, that does not stop me from coming in when I have a simple cold, and they can get me for taking random times off which are not IBD related.

After the 9 days in December, they said they would refer me to something call occupational health. That has not happened, and I was suppose to receive a phone call from them, so I guess they did not put the paper work through. This is kind of good because if I am sick again I can then say, "I am still waiting to hear from occupational health." Which will, continually set them back if they ever wanted to take a disciplinary rout.

I have learnt though, that if I have a cold or flu, that I will need to acquire a doctors note, which also will say that IBD affects the immune system. There was another lady who has Diabetes, and got a file note as she was off sick with a flu. They said the note did not say that the flu was also related to the diabetes. Which is common sense as of course diabetes affects the immune system.

It is hard, and harder in the US than in the UK. However, in the UK we have a lot of people claiming disability benefits and refuse to got to work, but if you are off sick too much at work, they can produce a disciplinary which then forces people out of work. It is stupid really.
 
Due to recent changes to employment law it is, I'm afraid, possible for you to be dismissed if you are on long term sick leave. It is a last resort, but even if your illness is covered by the Equalities Act (which replaced the DDA), it is still possible for an employer to dismiss you.


https://www.gov.uk/taking-sick-leave
 
Crohnsnewbie said:
I actually got fired because of my Crohns! :( I was diagnosed with it and then FIRED! :(
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This has happened to me multiple times and is probably about to happen again.

Funny how you get accolades from your employer when you're well and kicking butt and taking charge of things; but then, you're later fired for 'making' yourself a victim of circumstances.

The realistic way to look at it is this:

You're there to do a task, honestly. Your boss doesn't want you to die miserably, they just want the job done when they need for it to be done (or yesterday in most cases ;-) ). They see you as a liability, enough said.

The way I look at it (cynical point of view):

I have changed dogfood brands, window cleaner brands, and even mouthwash brands because I didn't like the results they were giving me. I've changed the place I go to get my prescriptions refilled because they were too expensive or rude. I've also changed the place I go to get money, willingly, because of their attitude toward chronic illness. Trust me, it isn't just you... everyone with a chronic illness is seen as a potential blocker. I've been written up by a boss with IBS who had recently been out for 3 months due to a surgery. My offense? Glad you asked. I missed a day due to hospitalization for a blockage.

Don't worry about it. If you take life too seriously, it will kill you.
 

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