Overreacting to son's bowel issues???

[SarahAnne]

I'm sure I'm not the only parent with IBD who watches their children's eating and bowel habits like a hawk. I am so scared that one of my kids will get Crohn's and it is the worst feeling in the world.

For a few years, my son occasionally gets what he calls the "bad poops", diarrhea basically. Lately, he has been having stomach pains too. He's 8, and when asked, he describes them as dull pains, like someone hitting him in the stomach with a hammer (he's pretty specific, not the metal part of the hammer, the wooden handle part). Like most kids though, he doesn't know exactly where his stomach is. When he points to the area that hurts, it's always around his belly button or lower.

This morning he was having pains while he was on the toilet. I finally got him to let me see inside the toilet (poor kid, he was about to die of embarrassment). It looked like he might have been constipated, one formed stool with a lot of small, skinny stools.

I don't know if I'd be jumping the gun getting him checked out...he's a smart kid, just like I was. I hid my symptoms for years from my mom (she was a nurse and I knew what kinds of tests they did there, plus I was deathly afraid of needles). Ewan knows what I've been through with my Crohn's, and he is just like me. He practically has a panic attack if he thinks he might get a shot at the doctors office. I have to cover my IV sites in the hospital when he comes to visit me because he can't stand to see where the needle goes in. He refused to look at my stomach after my surgery because the staples freaked him out. He would leave the house when my husband used to give me my Humira shots.

So I'm wondering....is this all of it? Or is he hiding some of it from me because he doesn't want to end up going through all of the stuff he's seen me go through? I feel like maybe I am making a whole lot of something out of nothing, but by the time I was diagnosed I had to have emergency surgery. And I ruined my entire childhood by hiding I was sick. I don't want that for him, but I also don't want to subject him to awful tests unnecessarily.

How do I handle this?

 

[Max's Mom]

Hi.SarahAnne,My son(11) has had Crohn's for a few years now. I worry all the time that one of my other kids will get it. As soon as they get a tummyache,my first question is where exactly is it hurting? Their pain is usually in the bellybuttonarea.Max's pain is always lower,we call it the Crohn'spot. My other kids' tummys seem to be hurting once every few weeks or so and usually lasts for a few hours. As long as that's the pattern I am not going to freak out. But I so understand your concerns. This is a horrible disease and I would do anything to stop it from happening to my son.I know that food does not cause Crohn's, but there are always speculations soone thing I wish I would have done differently is that I would have given them healthier foods when they were little,not so much sugary cereal and more fruits and vegetables. Cecilia

 

[DustyKat]

Oh SarahAnne, I'm so sorry to hear this...:hug:

I know you wish more than anything in this world that your boy doesn't have CD but thank goodness he has such a caring and knowledgable Mum.

You're right, he's a smart kid and you're his smart Mum so for you to be worrying like this I really think you have to start and instigate something or you will never rest. I don't think things sound to the point of having him seen to just yet so maybe start a diary of his symptoms? I don't know if you have seen the one in the wiki...

http://www.crohnsforum.com/wiki/Diary-Inclusions

Look to the obvious symptoms he may display but also generally observe him. I know you will know if things need to taken further and if so I would start with blood tests. I hear you about your son's aversion to anything medical, Matt is the same, and I know Matt is older but if need be I think he will step up to the plate and do what needs to be done.

Good luck hun and let us know how you get on with things.

Thinking of you, :heart:
Dusty. xxxxxxxx

 

[Sybil Vane]

I feel this exact same way. My son who is 10 has had stomach pains the past few days and I've been quietly freaking out. It's not a stomach bug because he acts like everything else is normal, just his stomach pain. I've asked him every question in the book and he swears he doesn't have any other symptom (not that I ever allude to CD). I'm so afraid my children will have Crohn's that I'm almost paralyzed when they tell me they have normal gas pains.

I can relate to your need not to put him through any tests.

 

[SarahAnne]

Thanks guys. I frequently worry about him because he has had a lot of "little" problems like I did when I was young. He was a very colicky baby from 3 wks. to 3 months, I couldn't breastfeed and he had to be on a special formula for babies with cow's milk protein sensitivities. The crazy thing now is all he wants to drink is milk! I have to limit his dairy intake, but he drinks a lot of water too. He also had really bad eczema, which he eventually outgrew. He has had very bad allergies since he was 2 or 3, he has been on every OTC allergy med (all worthless), many RX allergy meds (work for a few months and then stop). The pediatrician said his nose is very inflamed, he has chronic rhinitis. We are doing bloodwork soon to have him allergy tested, I have mentioned before that I have Crohn's so I'm going to ask the doctor to check a few things.

He is a very picky and particular eater, a lot like I was. He naturally stays away from foods that are common Crohn's triggers, especially green, fibrous veggies. He doesn't eat citrus, spaghetti sauce (they "burn" his mouth, he doesn't like "hot" foods, ie, spicy). He NEVER drinks soda, he hates the carbonation, says it also burns his mouth.

I'm trying my best to keep an eye on him without freaking him out, I can't ask him too many questions or he gets really annoyed. I think at 8 yrs old the last thing he wants is his mom asking about his bowel habits.

This is my kid who is a math and science whiz. He wants to be a scientist when he grows up, but he doesn't know what kind because he likes too many things. He once told me he wanted to be a scientist so he could find a cure for Crohn's so I would never have to hurt again. I think it would just about kill me if I had to watch him go through even a fraction of what I've been through.

 

[Jane]

I also am afraid my children will get crohn's. My daughter had diarrhea a week ago and my adrenaline definitely kicked in wondering whether it was an intestinal bug or something more. At times I wonder whether their farts are normal! Can one fart too much? Could it be a sign of crohns?

The thing is children do get diarrhea and they do get constipated. As a parent with crohn's it can be hard to know whether this is regular d or c. I guess my suggestion would be to keep an eye on the situation and if your son's problems persist then go to the doctor.

It sounds like your son is sensitive and aware. Maybe you need to have a conversation with him and tell him that if his stomach is bothering him and/or his bowel movements are D or C, that he should tell you. Explain it isn't embarrassing. Good luck!

 

[Sybil Vane]

Your boy sounds like a very sweet boy. I would have a chat with his pediatrician without him in the room. I ask my kids a lot of questions and they start getting nervous that I suspect they have Crohn's. It makes me sad that they even have to worry about it.

 

[DustyKat]

Just keep doing what you are doing hun...:hug:

Keep an eye on him, it doesn't have to exact or invasive. I bet as a Mum you already have developed an ability to look at your kids without really looking them. When he is at home just keep a mental note of how many times he may head to the toilet, you will know by the length of time he is here whether it is ones or twos, and jot it down later, that sort of thing.

Good luck SarahAnne, your boy is very lucky to be in such safe arms.

Dusty. :heart: