Recently became single

[poopaholic]

Well I am at a loss at how to ask what is bothering me . I am okay with her leaving me . We have just grown apart. Maybe she decided she didn't want to live with someone who is Destin for hardship. Don't really know . I just know that at times living with me is very difficult. So anyway it happened at a good time for me, if there is such a time . What I am saying is that I have been feeling really well lately after such a struggle for three years . I am back to work so bills are not a worry at the moment . It is just that I know that my problems will resurface , since my remission is due to steroids . I have been on 9mg of entocort for a long time . Not really sure but over a year without a break . Every maintance drug has either gave me side effects that are terrible or had no effect at all . I just fear that when I have troubles again and I have to go through it alone . Her children still want to maintain a relationship with me, but I am afraid that relationship will fade with time . Bottom line after visits they still go home to thier family, and I am alone . Which is fine . I have enjoyed having them over . I just worry about what to do if my crohns gets as bad as it was . How can I prepare for that ? I am 48 years old with a disease that no one in their right mind would volunteer to be part of . Basically what should I do ? Should I just be a loner for ever, or should I try it again . If someone is willing . I am just feeling like nobody would want to be with me due to my troubles . Anyway I should just hit the back button and earse this entire message but I think I will just send it and maybe somebody gets it , even though I typed a bunch of half thoughts .

 

[maria]

trust me I get what youre saying. Im in the same boat.

 

[poopaholic]

Thank you for your responce . I know you and I are not the only ones . I bet the boat you are referring to is more like a ship .

 

[maria]

Thank you for your responce . I know you and I are not the only ones . I bet the boat you are referring to is more like a ship .

yes definatly ship! But good thing we have each other to support.

 

[poopaholic]

Absolutely, just knowing that I am not alone helps, and having this forum has been a real lifesaver for me . I don't do Facebook to much gossip for me . This forum has been a daily read for me for quite some time now .

 

[maria]

Haha yes i agree with facebook after awhile to me its more about reporting negative things, also the drama. People take it way too seriously . Nice to talk to people who want uplift you and make you proud if yourself no matter the hell we are going through and not be judged in negative way.

 

[Andy1982]

I know how your feeling.

 

[D Bergy]

Luckily for us men, some women do not even care about whether we are healthy or not. Many are the care giving kind and do not shy away from these type of problems.

Maybe an extreme example but how many times have you heard of a convicted killer in prison that has a group of women that want to marry or do marry that person.

By comparison, any of us are princes when you look at it that way.

It is hard to generalize about women. They all seem to have a different operating system.

Dan

 

[Alley2231]

I get it. I was actually put in an annoying situation, after the guy I was dating came to visit me in the hospital - due to Crohn's. He tried to play the whole 'Oh, you should focus on getting better and not having a boyfriend, but when you're healthy again, let me know!' This all via TEXT at 7am before I had to go have tests done. I was like, this is something that isn't going to go away, I will have Crohn's Disease for the rest of my life and I'm not about having someone in my life who only wants to be around for the good times and not the bad. So I said 'Goodbye!'. I'd rather be single than to settle for someone who is just going to leave when things get tough.

I'm sure we'll all find the person were meant to be with one day. I right now, need to get reacquainted with my body again and build up some self esteem, before attempting to date again!

 

[poopaholic]

Thank you all for your responses . Im not too stressed about it . Just sometimes I think having crohns is enough, but if that would be the only problem. It's all the peripheral problems that get to me . I was just feeling a little down on myself, but now I feel a little better just knowing that there are people out there that understand . I will be fine . I always come through . Sometimes I amaze myself of what I can accomplish feeling the way I do . Then I have to listen to healthy people complain, but that's another subject . Thank you all again

 

[The Real MC]

I've been single since 2004 and was diagnosed with Crohns in 2005. Often I wonder if it is wise to stay single with Crohns but so far I have managed OK. Although my Crohns is mild compared to many cases I read here.

 

[LindaS]

I'm sure that right now it seems like you're destined to be alone. While I'm not in the same boat as you right now, trust me when I say you need time to grieve the passing of this relationship, even if you are okay with it being done. I don't know how long you were together, but that was a part of your life, and like all major life transitions, it takes time to adjust. I can't say for sure that you'll meet the right woman, but I can say that one day you'll figure out that you're doing okay.

 

[poopaholic]

Linda, you are dead on about the transition . We were together for about eight years . So yes there are many things in my life that had became routine, and now everything has changed . A small part of me misses her, but a large part of me feels relief from the arguing. I believe the feelings are mutual . Basically she walked away with leaving only a text . I said okay and haven't went looking for her . The love is gone . Probably the least violent break up ever . As far as destin to be alone, I don't think that is the case . I will just have to tighten up the standards . Evidently the old standards hasn't worked to well for me . But as of now I am just keeping on track with my health . Trying to do the best I can at work, and trying to to keep my mind occupied . Hopefully my end story involves the woman who can tolerate my shit, and I can tolerate hers .