I havnt posted in ages, but I do come and read post often. Back in late July, I had botox injections for a fissure and try also found a fistula along with hemorrhoids. So they did surgery to fix the fistula as well.
Well i went a couple of months without hurting to bad. It wasn't ever completely better, but before It hurt so much I would spend hours in the bathroom( strangely, sitting on the toilet relieved the pain somewhat) and sometimes it would hurt so bad my teeth would chatter and all I could do was pray the spasming would ease up soon. I've taken so much tylonal, it barely works for me anymore. I have lortab, but I don't want to take that all the time because it happened so often. At the end it was every single day. I also have some lidocane stuff I can use rectally, and that sometimes helps a lot, but I have this strange thing, I'm always afraid of running out of things and I don't use them until I literally cannot take the pain anymore. Even they don't always help the pain.
Well my doctor told me that the botox would last about 2 months, enough time the fissure should heal. I'm not sure if all the pain I'm having is from the fissure again or fistula or both. But its starting to get bad again where its happening every day, it bled a good bit the other day(first time since before surgery) and I'm taking tylonal almost every night again. Today it's not to bad, but Friday and Saterday was really painful. Took hours for it to go away.
I'm so frustrated!! I really hoped this surgery would be the end of it, but I'm afraid to go back to the doctor. Not only because it's embarrassing, but I'm not the best at compliance. I know I didn't eat as much fiber as she wanted me to, and i know she told me that if I still had problems, that the next step would be physical therapy. I have NO idea what that involves, but I know I don't want to do it. As crazy as it sounds, I rather have the surgery again than that! Exams are extremely hard enough on me as it is, much less whatever physical therapy involves!!
I just want to be a normal person who doesn't have to fear going to the bathroom because I know the pain that is coming. I'm tired of the pain. I have a high pain tolerance, which is a good/bad thing, good because it helps me get through it,bad because I hide my problems and I know I shouldn't, but I cant help it. Its so embarrassing. I feel so alone when I'm hurting because again, its not exactly an easy problem to come out about.
Venting. Excuse any misspellings. I'm typing on my iPad.
Well i went a couple of months without hurting to bad. It wasn't ever completely better, but before It hurt so much I would spend hours in the bathroom( strangely, sitting on the toilet relieved the pain somewhat) and sometimes it would hurt so bad my teeth would chatter and all I could do was pray the spasming would ease up soon. I've taken so much tylonal, it barely works for me anymore. I have lortab, but I don't want to take that all the time because it happened so often. At the end it was every single day. I also have some lidocane stuff I can use rectally, and that sometimes helps a lot, but I have this strange thing, I'm always afraid of running out of things and I don't use them until I literally cannot take the pain anymore. Even they don't always help the pain.
Well my doctor told me that the botox would last about 2 months, enough time the fissure should heal. I'm not sure if all the pain I'm having is from the fissure again or fistula or both. But its starting to get bad again where its happening every day, it bled a good bit the other day(first time since before surgery) and I'm taking tylonal almost every night again. Today it's not to bad, but Friday and Saterday was really painful. Took hours for it to go away.
I'm so frustrated!! I really hoped this surgery would be the end of it, but I'm afraid to go back to the doctor. Not only because it's embarrassing, but I'm not the best at compliance. I know I didn't eat as much fiber as she wanted me to, and i know she told me that if I still had problems, that the next step would be physical therapy. I have NO idea what that involves, but I know I don't want to do it. As crazy as it sounds, I rather have the surgery again than that! Exams are extremely hard enough on me as it is, much less whatever physical therapy involves!!
I just want to be a normal person who doesn't have to fear going to the bathroom because I know the pain that is coming. I'm tired of the pain. I have a high pain tolerance, which is a good/bad thing, good because it helps me get through it,bad because I hide my problems and I know I shouldn't, but I cant help it. Its so embarrassing. I feel so alone when I'm hurting because again, its not exactly an easy problem to come out about.
Venting. Excuse any misspellings. I'm typing on my iPad.
I'm sorry you aren't feeling well and yes, as you know, you need to be seen. At some point the embarrassment will fade and it'll become easier to talk about your symptoms, ask questions and get things treated in a timely manner.
