What do you do to destress your child??

[izzi'smom]

Alcohol is out. It works for me but...
Izz has fabulous labs, but is experiencing symptoms. I (and her doc) think she has an IBS component to her Crohns. For example, the day she got labs drawn her CRP was 1.4 but she was in the bathroom four times in the three hours leading up to her labs, each time c/o significant pain relieved by explosive d.
She hasn't been attending therapy, which I will get her back into, but I am at a loss.

I try not to involve her in stuff between her dad and I, but at times...it's tough. We have been going through a lot lately...he seems to think a 5 year old should be completing her own homework without any reminders/input from him and that my kids don't need to bathe the week they are with him. This is on top of a car accident and DWI for him. So I'm a bit irritated with him, and I am sure a bit of it shows.

Any ideas? I am going to try to get her into some lessons- swimming or gymnastics perhaps- as I know physical activity helps me destress- any other ideas?

 

[Maree.]

I think Physcial exercise is an excellent idea. I did a Chronic Pain Management program a few years ago and meditation & exercise we're two of the key strategies they encouraged for controlling pain & managing stress levels.

Meditation isn't really my thing and I'm not convinced would work for a 5 year old, but perhaps kids yoga or listening to environmental sound recordings might help. I have an album of a rain storm in a forest that I pull out when I reach the end of my tether, that seems to work on all of us.

 

[Tesscorm]

Poor Izzi, wish she wasn't having any more pains!

I agree with the physical activities! There's so much that comes with that - the destressing, the benefits of exercise, new friends, etc.! You might also consider a 'crafty' activity... something that she can also do at home as a distraction whenever she's not well or stressed. Years ago, I did ceramics and loved it - both at the class with others and also at home to relax.

 

[parentnj]

I agree with exercise ... when Alec is feeling stressed or down I take him outside to throw a baseball around or play wiffle ball ... being able to focus on something else and move around allows him to forget what is bothering him.

 

[poppets mum]

Distraction is definitely best. We keep bags or boxes of things in different rooms including bathroom with things like colouring books,stickers,beads,reading books. Even sitting down with your child and writing out a list of things to do for pain times. Also choosing outings. I have become pickier about paid activities/lessons choosing ones that she can cope with at this time. Last year was dance/acro, with all the bending,twisting and jumping was just too painful. Now she is doing swimming lessons and loving it.

 

[Clash]

Okay, don't throw things at me as I know you don't want to take on any more responsibility but animal therapy works great for a friend of mine with a young child that has stress issues. They didn't run out and buy a pet but rather spend time at a local horse farm each week, doing animal interaction type therapy. Her doctor had suggested time helping at a shelter but the Mom was worried that might upset the child more to see and that she would want to bring all the animals home so she opted for the horse farm. So far it seems to really be helping.

She also does swim classes which the Mom thinks are working as well.

 

[Jmrogers4]

Yes animal therapy works wonders. My mother-in-law volunteers with some therapy dog groups and takes a dog to a nursing home once a week. Jack goes every time he is available to do so I think he gets as much out of it as the residents of the home.
Exercise, Yes, we have done kids yoga and he does tons of sports.
Probably wouldn't work for her but Jack will take his Ipod and lay on his bed and listen to music

 

[my little penguin]

Hugs
No throwing stuff
But it could still be low lying inflammation .
I know for my kid we were told last march - markers are good
Tests are good - symtpoms must be Ibs related.
We saw pain management clinic in August after failing all the extra Ibs drugs
Remicade got a chance to work and mysteriously all his extra "Ibs" symptoms went away
Do I think stress can play a factor -yes
But given her history I would be looking towards more crohn's related.

As de stressors since they couldn't hurt
Warm baths
Soothing sound spa music
Braiding or brushing her hair
Get out the mad - oatmeal cookies- google mr Rogers
Play dough
Baking or cooking helps
Drawing a pictures of worries and locking them in a box.
Foot massage
Strings and beads
Bed time stories
Hot packs just make you feel cozy
Outside time even in winter
Family time even if you are just cleaning give her a spray bottle of water or dust cloth

 

[Brian'sMom]

Laughing is a big stress reliever. She's 5, but are there any shows you can watch together that make her laugh? (I like Disney channels; "Good Luck Charlie", but might be too old for her. Or you and her can just get each other laughing

It sucks your ex is being such a poop. That comment of yours about the kids not needing to bathe during the week they're with their dad made me laugh! Just the way you put it...funny. Probably annoying to you, and not funny!

I was curious about you saying labs were fabulous. Our GI freaks if brian's crp is anything but >.5. Yesterday his crp was 1.3 and she said, "His labs are bad". She tapped her pencil saying, "Hmmm, what to do..." He feels great and gained 6 lbs, so she's giving it another month. I've been wondering about her lately...

 

[Sascot]

Andrew and I enjoy a good laugh together, which helps a great deal. Although making him laugh in the middle of his blood test was probably not the smartest idea :ack:. I agree a fun exercise activity is good for "clearing the mind".
I find the night time (just before bed) a nice time to just chill with both kids, read to them. Andrew alternates between having a ridiculous story made up by me or a nice relaxing massage on his feet or back just before sleep time.

 

[izzi'smom]

Clash...ty for the reminder!!
Our local shelter was looking for people to hold/pet cats, and I think she'd be great with dogs as well. I meant to get into it after summer was through. Visiting nursing homes with therapy dogs is another great idea.
Love the stringing beads idea...brushing her hair makes her hate me lmao. We do read bedtime stories every night...I would love to explore her drawing a pic of her fears and locking it away/destroying it.
OMG she has been watching good luck Charlie for a year. It makes me laugh too. She has always been a bit mature and I believe this is why she worries so much.

I do rub her back when she is actively having pain, and we try to take time together...I volunteer at her school twice a month, plus this month we were able to go on a "date" after labs (Build a bear, dinner, shopping, carousel ride) as I didn't have her brother. We will try to do it again next month.

Her CRP was close to 70 last year before beginning Tacro...so under 3 is good for us lol (and "normal" as far as our lab is concerned). Her pain/bm's are stressor related-she has to poop as soon as we get to the lab. I was diagnosed with IBS ten years ago, although I was asymptomatic for years until recently-the pain immobilizes me just as it does her. Not saying I don't think she has inflammation-or that it isn't her Crohns-but I think that her bowel disease has an IBS component-ie: it's worse when she is stressed.
She is not quite a year out from her last scope that showed mild chronic inflammation. Her symptoms haven't changed much over-waxed and waned but not sure if I want to rescope her yet.
The showering thing is a bit funny...but yes, it irks me. He can't be bothered to check homework, bathe, shop, plan playdates/attend parties, do dr/dentist/GI/lab appts, etc, etc. So I do it all plus attempt to make life fun for my kiddos. Oh, and work full time, exercise, and attempt to have a social life. While he works ft. Umm, and watch movies. ARGH.

Sorry, that belonged in venting. lol!

 

[Farmwife]

Water therapy has worked great for Grace. Not only does she love the warm water but she loves the exercises the nice ladies do with her.

The only advice I can give on the ex is....talk to her teacher. I had this happen when I was teaching. The Dad wouldn't work with his kid so the mom told be please bring is up with the his dad. After a couple of times of talking to the dad I finally told him, I would have to get the director of my school involved. That worked!

Hugs to you both.

 

[jmckinley]

You've gotten some great advice on de-stressors. Ryan loves listening to/playing music and he used to love just floating in the water. At her age, she would probably love a Mom/daughter manicure/pedicure and the craft projects. We are also guilty of getting a puppy for stress relief. Ryan loves Buddy, but it is a lot of work!

If she is getting sick at the same time as labs, I wonder if the lab results worry her. Does the GI talk about the results in front of her? Kids take in alot more than we realize.

So sorry about the ex. I know that situation makes things so much more difficult. I really feel for Izzi. I have IBS, so I can relate. I get sick just about every time Ryan does!

I hope she is feeling better soon!

 

[Twiggy930]

My son also tends to have rapid onset of symptoms with any kind of stress. For him physical activity, time outdoors (harder to do in winter) and social interaction with peers helps to keep him in a positive mood. He has used relaxation recordings with limited success. By far the most reliable way to get him to relax is to cuddle our dog. Luckily we have a very lazy and cuddly dog!

 

[Dexky]

She's the perfect age to take up music…I'm partial to violin She would need to start with a gentle teacher however. Some music teachers cannot put themselves in a child's shoes and tend to be quite demanding. Any activity that involves her mind w/o fear of reprisal is good for de-stressing.

On a positive note, it's good to hear her labs are going good How's X going?…not Ex

 

[izzi'smom]

Bahaha at getting a dog...it would stress me out so much to take care of one more thing...it would negate any help lmao! I would love to do either equine therapy or dog therapy with her.
jmck her doc and I are friends and meet regularly. We discuss her results over text or in person and she hasn't been in to see him for months, although he drops by to see her when we get labs done occasionally. She doesn't cry to get poked, but she does stress about it. Off to have a discussion with her about fears...

 

[crohnsinct]

Hey Ang, sorry to hear about the stress. My little one is a very anxious sort. We tried physical activity and that bombed, went to instrumental music (I agree with Dex) but that bombed. Wanted to try art but she didn't, so we are now at drama and singing and so far that helps but I really think the kid needs some kind of therapy. Hugs hun...another long road to travel.

 

[Brian'sMom]

Angie, We already had 2 maltese before the crohn's dx. It now bothers me that the dogs come in with poop stuck to their butts occasionally...or vomit occasionally...or have a tick on them...or roll on something dead or stinky in the yard...etc. If I had known we had crohn's in the future I would have been pet free. (Sorry everyone to sound like such a dog scrooge!) Crohn's kinda makes me a germ phobe and pets...well nuff said.

 

[polly13]

Lucy does pony riding every Saturday - we started doing it about a year ago when she wasn't really able for anything too physical. She absolutely loves it , I found it lifted her hugely and still does. Sorry to hear about the stress

 

[NMMom]

Hey Angie,

I totally understand - I have the same concerns with Ellie. Right now she is doing gymnastics and that has been good and we've also done yoga. I think the yoga did/does help as she focuses on her breathing and then when she does have stomach pain I try to get her to use the breathing exercises to get her pain level down. Kind of makes me think of lamaze but, hey, whatever works . Of course there are days where she's in bed or on the couch feeling horrible and for those days we pull out the small crafts. Let's see - we have the Alex toys potholder kit, that is a good one; she does beading and likes it; we tried embroidery - maybe a bit too young; and just recently we've been sewing together. Oh, one more thing, the "never fails to distract her ipad", lol. I wish I would win a lot of money so I could buy every child with IBD and their parents an ipad. There are so many fun learning apps that she can kind of lose herself in that even if she's having a rough day.

 

[izzi'smom]

Just a note that we have been swimming twice a week, which helps. She starts lessons next week. We also made "worry stones" out of clay; to give her worries to before she goes to bed (along the lines of worry dolls from Guatemala...anyone remember those??)
I am working on getting her into yoga...I just picked up a note from her doc last night giving her permission as the center requires it.