Depressed a bit

[Jeff D.]

Hey guys sorry I have not really contributed much for a while. I have been practicing guitar for hours when I get home from school and I have been working pretty late so not much time for posting.

This is pretty much just a vent so if you want to listen to my vent keep reading, I guess.

I have felt pretty well except for the past few weeks. When I normally have a bowel movement it comes out perfectly formed and stuff but all of a sudden I am getting little pebbles coming out. They don't hurt or anything it is just that I am not pooping as much quantity as I normally do. But once a week I get a large regular bm. I feel well most of the day and stuff its just when ever I go to work I feel sick. I don't know if it is the Subway smell or what but it always gives me the runs when I work. I think the reason for my problems may be the fact that I really don't want to work their anymore but I can't quit because I have to save up to pay my parents back for car insurance, my bike, and my dads car that I just got into my first accident with. My dad keeps making fun of me and saying that I owe hime big time especially now that his car is in the shop and he has a shitty ass car now that handles horribly.

I am also saving up money because hopefully tomorrow if everything goes right I am asking this girl out that I have been trying to ask out but everyday seems to have been the wrong time. So I am going to just need to do that.

Then my schedule is just crazy right now. I have work Mondays and Tuesdays, Wednesdays guitar class and now I have volleyball practice. Thursdays I have off but I am going to start recording stuff with another kid at my school and I am going to start learning Christian Rock songs that I am going to play at college youth mass next year. Fridays I have a table soccer game. Saturdays I have church and a Jeff nonstop guitar practice for at least three hours. Then Sunday I have volleyball practice.

On top of that I am worried that the college I am basicaclly accepted into does not have my transcript or application because it has been over a month and I have not heard anything from them. The reason I am worried though is that I sent both the transcript and application in the same folder that had my free application pass but I think I had to mail them seperately and now I am freaking out.

I really do not know why all of a sudden I have become depressed. Hopefully when I hang out with my friend this weekend my freak out will stop. She is the only person besides my old best friend who lives too far away from me for me to see her and she is going to college. She was always my main support system and now it is gone because she has too much stuff going on.

Thanks who ever has read all of this jibberish,

-Jeff-

 

[fgillette1986]

Hi Jeff. Sounds like you've got yourself pretty well booked. Don't forget to set aside some relaxing time for yourself buddy. Hope everything gets better for ya.

 

[Mazen]

Jeff. I think it's very important that you realize how lucky you are that even though you have Crohn's , you can still do so many activities and live somehow a normal life. You should thank God everyday for this gift, and just feel happy that you are not in a flare or worse. I find that just putting some time aside every day to pray and thank God for passing the day with no major complications, a very good way to relax and forget the depression I face sometimes. Wish you all the best.

 

[ruthymg]

Hi Jeff, sorry you're feeling fed up right now. I too have a pretty hectic schedule at the moment and most of the time I feel drained. Its important that you take time out to relax, even if playing your guitar is something that makes you feel relaxed then do that. Rushing here there and everywhere eventually wears us all out and doesn't give us much time to think things through properly. Its likely that everything is ok with your college and that they just have loads to do like the rest of us, I am sure you will hear something from them soon. The fact that you're not relaxing much is probably having an affect on your stress levels and thats probably why you are worrying about things that you probably don't need to worry about. Make sure you take time out before things get any worse and don't forget we are all here if you need a good vent. Hope you feel better soon.


Ruth

 

[kix66]

WOW - I have to agree with Mazen, you are so lucky to be so active, I wish I had a 1/4 of the energy to do things I'd like to do. Hang in there, you sound like a strong well rounded guy.

kathy

 

[Jeff D.]

Thanks guys. I just needed to vent. I put it in the wrong forum but whatever. Yeah I just started to have energy last summer do to serious meditation and forced excercise. Up until then I have hardly had any energy and most days did not have enough energy to go down my stairs in the morning. Thanks again

 

[MJNixon]

Depression and Anxiety run in people with Crohn's. I once had a doctor tell me that doctor's originally thought Chron's was caused by Anxiety. Really man, you can't let other people dictate your happiness. Only you can make yourself happy.

 

[rumplestiltskin]

Jeff - hope you get the girl and the college you want. Heres to you feeling better soon.

 

[GNC Crohn's Man]

Hope you get to feeling better and never feel bad about venting either... I have felt depressed before when I had no problems simpley because I was worried I would have problems again... But friends always seem to help so always remember to make time for them and have fun...