Embarrassing flare ups in public places

[bunny42]

Hi, I have a mild form of Crohn's and have been taking Pentasa for several years. I know I'm lucky compared to some as I'm reasonably fit and well, have a full time job and for the most part lead a normal life, apart from the fact I've been suffering excrutiating and embarrassing urgency when out shopping and I don't understand why. I do have problems with urgency most days, usually first thing in a morning, but I've noticed that every single time I go to the shops it happens. I'm stood in the middle of a busy shop in terrible pain, not able to move for fear of messing myself and actually despite all my best efforts, usually leak a bit so then fear it will show through my clothes or I'll smell, then when it's safe to move I have to dash through a busy store with dirty pants to the nearest toilet. I had the worst episode today I've had for a long time, made worse by the fact I was in a strange place and didn't know where the nearest toilets were, trying to cross a busy main road without messing myself even more. I cannot understand why it only seems to happen when I'm out at the shops because I can go out other places like cinema, pub or restaurant and be absolutely fine. It's getting to the stage where I'm wondering whether I should just stop going shopping altogether and let my partner do it all, but then I'd be giving in and letting the crohn's rule me. I don't feel stressed when out shopping, it's not something I dread or hate, in fact I quite enjoy it so I don't understand what's happening to me. Has anyone else ever found they have these kind unexplained episodes in certain situations and can advise or share their experiences.
Thanks

 

[butt-eze]

Hey Bunny

This happened to me all the time when I was flaring. ALL THE TIME!!! I knew where every bathroom was at every store. Places like Costco would force me to only venture so far from the bathroom because I knew if I got too far away I wouldn't make it if the feeling struck. It didn't stop me and I did have my fair share of accidents.
For a little while I actually wore depends to work just in case I couldn't make it.
I would suggest you bring with you at all times a clean up kit (wipes, change of pants, etc.). I would also suggest that you carry a card that explains your disease to others in the event you need to cut in front of them in a public bathroom. I don't have one but I've heard the CCFA has them available.
If you don't want to wear a full diaper I might suggest a super absorbant pad. It will contain it until you can make it to the bathroom at least.

 

[Guest]

hi Bunny, welcome to the forum

aw, that must be so hard for you to cope with. i've had many near-misses, but never actually had it go that far.

you've covered what i was going to suggest, ie could it be stress/anxiety of being in a busy crowded environment, but it sounds not to be the case. i don't know what to advise really.. maybe not eat for a few hours before going shopping, or try different times of the day.. do you have 24hour supermarkets where you are? maybe try going late at night, if you do, and see if the same thing happens.

sorry i can't be of more help, but i'm glad you found us, & hope you find a way round this problem soon.

 

[Isla]

Interestingly enough small but damaging rises in stress has been proved to be undetectable by people. A study was done on the effects of loud office noises, such as clacking of keys - low voices - ringing telephones - whirring of cpu fans etc. Through their reports before, during, and after they felt no more stress than they normally do but medical tests proved that their stress level increased by 30-50% So it is very possible that subconsciously you are stressed. So don't rule out stress completely.

/two cents

 

[Kev]

I echo everything that's been said.. esp. some protection in the undergarment area.... I'm a male, and I've stocked up at times on the cheapest, superabsorbent feminine pads I could find. Hey, whatever works, right? Another thought, and its a bit of a mind messer... but there is a concept called self fulfilling prophecy. You're convinced in your mind something bad will happen, and your mind subconsciously makes that happen.. A lot of people pooh pooh (or in our case poo poo) the idea behind the power of positive thinking. Perhaps if you start asserting in your mind that it won't happen...???
Plus... a natural response to fear is loss of bodily control.. They didn't coin the phrase 'scared shitless' on a whim. Basic animal instinct (even in us humans) is to void bladder or bowel in a fear situation to make us less palatable to predators. The 'real' fear you're feeling may, by itself, be enuff to push you over the edge. These aren't psychosomatic apparitions, just your body doing what it retained from its ancient forebears. Knowing that, you should be able to approach this from a different perspective... training your mind to overcome your instincts...

 

[BWS1982]

I've had urgency without regards to location. My thoughts are on what Mike said about movement. Maybe it's the walking. You mention a pub and a theater, those are very sedentary outings, and perhaps you are making things move faster, as I know that's the case with me. I'll get out of the car after a 30 minute drive, and BAM! dirty Hanes (or Depends as of late) after 5 steps, when during the drive, I was completely fine and felt nothing at all. Same thing with sitting or lying down for a bit, I get up after not moving for a while and my bowels get the "go" message and erupt within seconds.

 

[Creepy Lurker]

I've taken to carrying spare underwear and toilet paper around with me everywhere. The amount of times I've rushed into a toilet and (part way through) realised there was no paper.

 

[Kev]

I take pre-packaged wet wipes... intended for changing baby diapers.. with me. I can fit a couple of these (like oversized condom packages) discretely in a pocket. I can use them when there's no toilet paper, or when t.p. alone just doesn't cut it.

 

[My Butt Hurts]

Oversized condom packages.... heh, heh, heh.........
Who needs an oversized condom?!?!?
I can NOT stop laughing at that one! HEEEEEEEEE HEE HEE!!!!!

 

[FruitLoop]

I take codeine before going out to give me a bit of breathing space.

Thankfully i have never had a major accident - just a small dribble !!

A few weeks ago my hubby discovered some poo on the stair carpet and asked me if i had had an accident !! It was the cat