Embarrassing noises!!!

[littlefreebird]

Ok so last year I can recall bragging about my extremely quiet Stoma. Well today I was working in the surgery, patient is in the chair, the room is silent and my Stoma (without feeling any warning) made the loudest wettest noise ever... Like I actually sounded like I crapped myself. It was too loud to ignore! I had to mention it and say, 'tummys gurgling again" even though it founded nothing like a rumbly tummy... Mortified!

....anyone else had any embarrassing noises at the most awkward times?

 

[Nyx]

Huge fart during an exam....I just looked around like it wasn't me....lol

 

[2thFairy]

In the middle of saying grace before a family meal. Embarassing, but hilarious too!

 

[Terriernut]

Stan is notorious for his timing. Quiet meetings...off he goes. Once dealing with a customer in negotiations, I SWEAR he mouthed off..bbbbbb***tch.

He was right of course, she was!

 

[Crohn'sFor Life]

I was conducting an interview when my stoma started to go nuts. It must have been the pineapple chunks I ate for lunch. I figured what the hell, the applicant's reaction to the sounds would give me some insight into their personality! Heh!

 

[DMac]

My stoma is very quiet now, but prior to this stoma formation my stoma was very loud. Whilst I was training to be a nurse at uni, I would have to literally wrap a stoma support belt and bandages (sounds extreme, I know) around my waist, to try and muffle the sounds. It wasn't practical, was very uncomfortable, but if gave me some piece of mind.

Even though my stoma is now quiet, I still dread being in public places that are very quiet. Went to a school induction parent meeting with my wife recently, and spent the whole meeting with my arm pressing over my stoma. I have had instances of loud noises and like you, I have said that it was my belly rumbling. Not sure I convinced anyone that was actually true

 

[annawato]

My stoma is pretty quiet, touchwood, but before I had my first resection my stomach used to make the loudest noises. Sounded like a blocked drain gurgling (which I guess it was). It was particularly embarrassing with the kids who I tutored in maths..............

 

[Jam300]

I did a bowel prep the day before yesterday and went round to my girlfriends house yesterday to watch a film, the noises my stomach was making were unholy.

For some unknown reason though, her stomach's as loud as mine and shes' not got any form of IBD or anything like that.

 

[Terriernut]

If her stomach is as loud as yours...I'd say she's a keeper!!!

 

[Misty-Eyed]

My stoma always gets really loud and active whenever I have a smoothie after my lunch for some reason! Luckily it doesn't really sound like a fart.. more like a loud squeaking noise and no one had any idea as to what it is!!

 

[Jam300]

If her stomach is as loud as yours...I'd say she's a keeper!!!

My thoughts exactly!

 

[Gav]

Not been around in a while, Hi everyone ! This is something that really has affected me!

My stoma is loud, loud and LOUD! Over the last few years I've worked out what sets it off...generally gassy drinks, any kind of pure juice (not too dissimilar from your reaction to your smoothie Michelle), gulping drinks and nervously swallowing air.

Even with avoiding all the above that I can't guarantee it will stay quiet and in an office environment that can be tough, so I decided to do something about it. I cut a piece of an oven glove out (just a small square piece) and I place that over the bag where the stoma sits underneath my waistband, which pulls it nice and tight to the stoma, and it's best muffling device I've come up with!

So ever since, rather than the sound of a loud, wet fart interrupting an important meeting at its very worst it's a loud stomach gurgle. I'm glad I studied Engineering.

Having said that, if someone had said 10 years ago I'd be going to work with part of an oven glove stuffed in my underwear I'd have asked when they were booked in for their lobotomy, and to bring it forward if possible.

 

[annawato]

Welcome back Gav, sounds like a brilliant idea you came up with. I can see a rush on oven gloves happening all around the world!
:heart: Anna

 

[Terriernut]

:rof: I had a vision of Stan spitting it out! But great idea if your stoma will tolerate being 'hushed'!

 

[Absentminded]

Norman is usually pretty quiet, thank goodness.....However, my husband and I decided to have our first (and apologies if this is tmi) intimate time together since my surgery the other day, and Norman decided this was the perfect time to let rip! Thankfully my hubby thought it was funny, as I vainly attempted to muffle the noises coming from Norman. He tried the whole orchestra of sounds available! Grrrrrr!

 

[Terriernut]

:rof: I see Norman has the same sense of timing as my Stan!

 

[Absentminded]

Yup! They're little so and sos aren't they!