How am I supposed to feel?

[pammypants]

Was diagnosed Crohns yesterday and although I kind of expected it I was so nervous I was shaking and cried when he told me. Have cried a few times since and when i'm not crying I'm almost relieved that at last I have a diagnosis and can start treatment. Then I read the positive comments from such brave people on the forum and wonder what I am getting in a state for and then an hour later am crying again. Am I being a Drama Queen or is this normal and if it is normal how long will I feel like this? I just want to start feeling better as I feel so tired, sick, am in pain most of the time and am running to the loo every few minutes. My Consultant has told me nothing really and I have to wait for a call from a Specialist Nurse next week. My family are wondering what the fuss is about as initially I told them Crohns was nothing and a tablet could sort it out, just so they didn't worry(my own fault I know). I just don't know how to feel. I don't want to feel sorry for myself as I am always used to putting everyone else first and never normally consider myself or my feelings, part n parcel of being a wife and mum I guess. Any advice would be gratefully reveived. xxx

 

[Rebecca85]

You could be describing how I felt 2 1/2 years ago when Crohn's was first mentioned. By the time I got the definitive diagnosis 2 months later I was starting to turn the corner. But even then I would have my self pity moments. It's a perfectly normal reaction to such life changing news!

You might want to read the sticky on grief- think it's in the support forum.

 

[Ckt]

Oh sweetheart!i cried too when I was diagnosed and I was 40!!with my diagnosis came the end of my peace corps career and any hope of doing work in a developing country which was where I was headed. So yes, your reaction to me is completely normal! Over the past ten years, I have gained so much in my life that I can hardly describe all of it!the outside of my life may look like I have less..I haven't been able to work since 2002(but am now applying for positions again!), I'm not athletic anymore, I am limited financially..but those are all things. I am learnig to have peace with who I am..without defining me by my stuff. Life is really good!!
Give yourself time and be patient with yourself. .also your family. They don't fully understand what we have to go through. Even my mom who has been present during all my surgeries and most of my flares still says'oh. I get those symptoms too with ibs!"..bless!and when someone that knows I have crohns makes a comment about how bad they feel with a stomach bug I just smile and say..welcome to my world!!
You will find you are much stronger than you think.and this doesn't mean you have to put on a brave face either!not to yourself. I have pushed myself relentlessly all my life..I am learning now to go gently..but go
Hope this helps you and remember that all of us are different.You'll soon learn what your new 'normal' is!!:ysmile:

 

[Grumbletum]

http://www.crohnsforum.com/showthread.php?t=22520
Pammy, this is the link that Rebecca mentions. Very few doctors, I think, deal with this aspect of a positive for Crohn's diagnosis. I'd been ill for 8 months before I was diagnosed so I cried too when I heard - partly from relief. Luckily, I'd found this forum when the possibility of Crohn's was first mentioned cos I would have been lost without it.
Sometimes it feels like being on a runaway train, but talking to people here and using the information resources helped a lot with my fear of the unknown. It also helps to understand what your options are and with understand what the docs are going on about!
And crying is much better than trying to bottle it all up. We're here with shoulders and tissues whenever you need them xxx

 

[deb123]

Hi Pammypants,

You certainly are NOT a drama queen! I cried buckets when diagnosed, through fear, relief, and because i felt violated with all the tests i had endured. It will get better once you have a treatment plan, and medication to help you with your symptoms.

I have definitely had my ups and downs with Crohns - i was diagnosed at 21. Life can be the same, you just have to make allowances sometimes. In a way it has made me a more patient, tolerant person. I never take my health for granted anymore. If you smoke, then i would definitely quit as that helps loads. I have been in remission for 7 years after my hemicolectomy op, and have only recently flared. Stress also makes me flare.

Best wishes to you, and let us know how you get on.