I'm Pissed Off

[towlsmoke420]

I have crohns disease. I know this. Everyone has been getting under my skin lately. no matter where i go, I am always reminded of the person I use to be.

all my friends keep asking me why did I lose weight. how did I lose all my muscles. Lately I have been seeing people I have not seen in years and everyone is asking me what happened.

Than when I go out, everyone wants to go out drinking, but I cant drink because when i do, i get sick . this fkn sucks. i cant even hang out with my friends anymore because its weird to argue with people about not eating with them or drinking.

I miss who I was. Before this disease I had everything. I had a woman, a good body, my confidence was at the max, my friends envy'd me, I was doing real well in my college courses, and I had a excellent social life. BUT now I am some lonely guy with crohns disease and arthritis, Iv lost so much weight and when ever I try to work out I become discouraged because I struggle with arthritis pain. I have NO social life now. I'm behind in college and now everyone is looking down on me

 

[Mountaingem]

Yes, I understand, I went through that too-I think everyone does. Crohn's runs interference with the person you think you are and turns you into someone new.

I used to be a commercial artist before Crohn's, life of the party, avid hiker and thrill seeker. I had a curvy figure so of course when I lost weight at first women think you're anorexic and no matter what I told my friends they wouldn't believe me.

The worst though was losing my career-arthritis has affected my hands to the point I'm no longer a professional-calibur artist. I had to learn to let go of my preconceived ideas and find out where life would take me and how to make the best of it.

There are plenty of people here to encourage and help you, but it's a journey you have to make on your own, and find out what's best for you.

Best wishes to you! You might not be the old you,but someone much more than you thought you could be.

 

[tiloah]

I know it sucks to be the sober one, but people always appreciate the designated driver.

On the other hand, there are some pretty cool people out there who don't drink. I know you miss hanging out with your old friends, but if they won't hang out with you sober, it might be worthwhile meeting some people who will?

I'm sorry you're feeling down. This disease definitely takes a lot away from you, but if you're willing you can find ways to take things for yourself.

 

[towlsmoke420]

I know it sucks to be the sober one, but people always appreciate the designated driver.

On the other hand, there are some pretty cool people out there who don't drink. I know you miss hanging out with your old friends, but if they won't hang out with you sober, it might be worthwhile meeting some people who will?

I'm sorry you're feeling down. This disease definitely takes a lot away from you, but if you're willing you can find ways to take things for yourself.

I understand where your coming from. But all my friends knew me meanwhile I was the fun guy, now I suck out the fun

It's actually harder than you think to find people who don't drink.Especially in college

I'm in college, I always get invited drinking because everyone drinks in college! Its not fair how I cant go out and have fun with my school people. Beside my friends in school I have no one else to hang out with. I am home everyday!. I use always be out!. urgh this sucks. It also sucks that if I do happen to be hanging out, my friends always want to eat something I cant have. Than when were all eating it gets uncomfortable because they tell me how weird they feel eating in front of some one.

 

[GutlessWonder86]

you can always order a virgin drink and go out with your friends. they don't have to know there's no alcohol in your drink. That's what I use to do. as for the eating, just say you ate a huge meal at home and only want dessert or you just aren't hungry at all. Your friends should understand. If not, then they weren't your friends to begin with.

Try attending a local CCFA chapter meeting near you to meet others who have IBD. You'd be surprised how many folks there are like yourself and even in your neighborhood. You'll learn how to cope at school, diet tips, the latest treatments, the best GIs in the areas, what hospitals are the best and which ones to avoid, you can participate in a Take Steps walk to raise $$ and awareness in the community, etc.

go to ccfa.org to find your chapter. Also, CCFA does hold educational meetings sponsored by drug companies with topics on exercise, diet, surgical options w/a medical team panel that has a Q&A session, dieticians that talk about foods that can aggravate the gut during a flare up, etc.

Who knows, maybe you'll even make a new friend or two. I've made several myself.

Good luck. ~GW

 

[tiloah]

I understand where your coming from. But all my friends knew me meanwhile I was the fun guy, now I suck out the fun

It's actually harder than you think to find people who don't drink.Especially in college

I'm in college, I always get invited drinking because everyone drinks in college! Its not fair how I cant go out and have fun with my school people. Beside my friends in school I have no one else to hang out with. I am home everyday!. I use always be out!. urgh this sucks. It also sucks that if I do happen to be hanging out, my friends always want to eat something I cant have. Than when were all eating it gets uncomfortable because they tell me how weird they feel eating in front of some one.

I didn't drink in college (I graduated a couple years ago) and neither did any of my friends. Perhaps you are just looking in the wrong places? How do you meet people? You're telling me it's harder than I think, but I think it's actually easier than YOU think.

Maybe you could suggest to your friends to do an activity that wouldn't be conducive to eating. What kind of things do you like to do besides eating and drinking? Are you open to new activities?

It sounds to me like you're obstacle building. Maybe sit your friends down for a chat and say, hey, what can we do about this? They can't drink ALL the time.

 

[GutlessWonder86]

I agree with Dies. Talk to your friends. If they can't accept you for you, then they were never your friends to begin with. A true friend will like you for you, inside and out.

Branch yourself out and meet new ones. Join a club, volunteer, attend a local CCFA meeting you will meet TONS of new friends there, join a club at your place of worship if they have one, volunteer at a local hospital they always need volunteers there, try a local nursing home, or even an animal shelter. The sky is the limit. You will never know unless you try. I've made so many new friends myself via the local CCFA chapter where I live and the local ostomy chapter. I met my now BFF via the ostomy group and it's been 25 years!!!!! She's running the group now since I had my stroke 6 yrs. ago and I'm the visitor liasion since I'm not able to work. I get to do new ostomate visitations over the phone and at the hospitals. I've never met so many awesome people from so many walks of life before.

So get out there and make a difference in someone's life. You will be surprised at how many people you will affect.

~GW

 

[betty669]

I feel like I have lost myself , I can say that I hate this disease, hmmmm cant eat, sex hmm whats that nowdays , going places with my family or friends , cant work , sometime my best friend in my bathroom , ( I just want my life back )