Overwhelmed

[silver]

This last month has been awful! We moved house only to find it was flea infested and got bitten to death I can't hoover the carpet or mop the floors because of the residual pesticide (i'm a little bit of a clean freak so it's driving me mad!). I was made redundant from my job on the same day that I was found to be in a flare and I can't see my GP because he's very popular and doesn't have an appointment for two months!

I'm getting married in 6 weeks and have fallen behind on everything because I've no place to work (I can't find any jewellery so am having to make it :S) i'm trying to decorate the house as my brother is moving in with us at the end of August and my fiance decided he absolutely couldn't leave the artex ceilings so he's plastering them! Dealing with my mother (she hates the fact that my wedding isn't what she wanted) is sapping my energy because I always feel like i'm walking on eggshells The housework is piling up, I feel awful and useless and like i'm screwing everything up again :'( and to top it all my 'therapy' of my hen night in Bristol has had to be cancelled because I haven't got the money or the energy to organise it anymore...

Most likely i'm bitching about nothing, I guess it's just getting to me....

 

[Crohn's 35]

Silver you have a lot on your plate! Moving, is a major stress marker, so is a wedding and having your mum trace your every move to YOUR wedding... no wonder you feel like crap!

You are going to have to look after yourself and you say what goes...it is YOUR day, your money and your health. If you are not careful sweetie you KNOW where you are going to end up!

Our health is number one, and once you get a flare or symptoms in check you will feel more confident and happy about what is going on around you. It should be an exciting time in your life! Keep us posted... and I want to see wedding pics after! :hug:

 

[silver]

Thanks for not making me feel like i'm overreacting...it seemed like such a good idea to do most of the wedding preps ourselves last year...:S

 

[Silvermoon]

Hey Jem.

All I can say is "Holy Crap!"

that is a lot to take on in a short time...it is going to wear anyone out, never mind someone with a lower energy lever....

Take it slow, one day at a time, and do what YOU want to do.

I remember when I first got married...clean the house spotless, cook nice meals for my new hubby..work a full day...and still ahve time to spend with my hubby...

Well..it doesn't work! LOL! It still bugs me that my floors aren't clean and the dishes are piled up, but you know what? Hubby knows your condition and knows you can't do it all... so if HE doesn't care that his socks stick to the floor, neither shoudl you!

As for your mom...next time she "hounds" you about what you need to do for YOUR wedding...telling her to stop or you guys will elope and she won't get to see ANY of it (I know, this is all easier said than done...but it gives you something to dream about for a bit, and then plod along with your day...lol :redface: )

I wish you well.

 

[Astra]

Hiya Jem

I have one word for you
ELOPE
it's the best thing I ever done, told no one, got the flak when I got back, but just told everyone to piss off!

OK, here's some advice, Cognitive Behaviour Therapy wise
whatever is happening to you is affecting the way you think, the way that you think is affecting your behaviour!
change this by writing everything down that you need to do, whatever is upsetting you, the people who are getting on your tits and so on!
Then 'chunk' it
do this by mindmapping it, put everything into priorities and give each one a number of priority, then work thro each one, one by one til complete.
This is chunking.
you will see your behaviour changing cos your thinking will change, this will be your coping strategy, and this will give you a stress free 6 weeks.
good luck, and if you need any help with CBT, PM me
lotsa luv
Joan xxx

 

[silver]

Thank you guys! You're all wonderful :wub:

I have been scarce because i've been jobhunting. But success! I start my new job on Monday (still very surprised it went so quickly)

Thank you so much for the advice, I always like to hear different coping strategies, as often i'm not sure how to deal with it.

Meds on Friday and positive attitude going forward five weeks to go!

Thanks again!

 

[Cat-a-Tonic]

Congrats on your new job and your upcoming wedding! Try not to worry too much about your mother - it's your wedding, not hers! If she doesn't like things then tell her that's her opinion but it's your wedding and you'll do things the way you want. Don't let her take control of things - when my friend got married, her mother took control and decided when and where the wedding would be held, what would be served for dinner, etc. My friend thought it would be less stressful to just let her mother take control, but it wasn't, it was horrible and my friend was so stressed out! In the end the mother actually tried to invite herself along on the honeymoon, and that's when my friend finally put her foot down and said NO! So don't let your mother boss you around like that or she may never stop!