- Joined
- May 7, 2014
- Messages
- 46
Hi everyone.
I just really felt like I needed to come on here tonight and get some stuff out before I explode I was diagnosed with Crohn's a couple of weeks ago now following an MRI but am not on any medication yet as the GI has scheduled a colonoscopy for this weekend to see the extent of the damage in my terminal ileum.
When I first got diagnosed, I felt a huge sense of relief after suffering from symptoms for 10 years and constantly being told there was nothing wrong with me by GP's and other specialists. So when it was finally confirmed, I felt like I wasn't crazy and someone had finally taken me seriously. But today, I have been feeling absolutely awful. Could barely move out of bed, really bad muscle aches and joint pain, nausea, bloating, cramping and generally feeling really unwell. So this evening I decide to go have a nice bath and wash my hair to try and make myself feel a bit better which led to a complete emotional breakdown (lol stupid right?!). I was drying my hair but could barely hold my arms up and I felt like no matter what I do, I will feel and look like utter crap.
I think the initial sense of relief has worn off and been replaced by all these horrible feelings. I am so scared and anxious about what the future holds and have a million things running through my head; why me? What did I do to deserve this horrible illness? Will my life just be a series of hospital visits, surgeries and nasty medications? And I know everyone here is fighting their own battles, and I just feel so weak for feeling this way and getting myself into a state.
I know there is no magic solution here, I just already feel like this forum is such an amazing support in my life since my diagnosis and somewhere I can be really honest with some truly helpful people. I guess I just wanted to get all of this off my chest somewhere people truly understand what it all means.
Thank you for reading this far.
Sarah x
I just really felt like I needed to come on here tonight and get some stuff out before I explode I was diagnosed with Crohn's a couple of weeks ago now following an MRI but am not on any medication yet as the GI has scheduled a colonoscopy for this weekend to see the extent of the damage in my terminal ileum.
When I first got diagnosed, I felt a huge sense of relief after suffering from symptoms for 10 years and constantly being told there was nothing wrong with me by GP's and other specialists. So when it was finally confirmed, I felt like I wasn't crazy and someone had finally taken me seriously. But today, I have been feeling absolutely awful. Could barely move out of bed, really bad muscle aches and joint pain, nausea, bloating, cramping and generally feeling really unwell. So this evening I decide to go have a nice bath and wash my hair to try and make myself feel a bit better which led to a complete emotional breakdown (lol stupid right?!). I was drying my hair but could barely hold my arms up and I felt like no matter what I do, I will feel and look like utter crap.
I think the initial sense of relief has worn off and been replaced by all these horrible feelings. I am so scared and anxious about what the future holds and have a million things running through my head; why me? What did I do to deserve this horrible illness? Will my life just be a series of hospital visits, surgeries and nasty medications? And I know everyone here is fighting their own battles, and I just feel so weak for feeling this way and getting myself into a state.
I know there is no magic solution here, I just already feel like this forum is such an amazing support in my life since my diagnosis and somewhere I can be really honest with some truly helpful people. I guess I just wanted to get all of this off my chest somewhere people truly understand what it all means.
Thank you for reading this far.
Sarah x