Anyone look at everything in a positive way?

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EthanPSU

EthanPSU

Joined
Jul 7, 2010
Messages
848
Location
Pennsylvania
Does anyone else here only view things in a positive way? I know that it might sound stupid in some ways but even the most negative things can be seen positively. So far the lifestyle has worked out for me. Everyone I meet I become friends with, cant think of one person that has anything against me. I am friends with the badass drugdealer at school to the most popular jock. Ever since being diagnosed with crohns I have came to the relization that thinking negatively is just pointless, you arnt going to get anywhere with it. If something bad has happened its not going to get better so why worry about it.

And when I mean I see the positive is everything doesnt mean I go around acting all cheery, I can get very angry but it doesnt last long.

"The positive thinker sees the invisible, feels the intangible, and achieves the impossible.”

:ladysman:

(ok, one person hates my positive thinking, my last gf hated me lol)
 
yeah i definitly hear you on this.

cant say i ALWAYS remember this, i def have my pessimistic moments...or weeks...or months...LOL

but really the way i see it negative always has an equally positive impact somewhere else. the neg is necessary. otherwise we would never have good OR bad and that leaves us neutral and THAT is no way to live. a way to cope, maybe and it might save you much pain in the short run. but really it is probably one of the worst things you could ever do to yourself is to turn off your feelings.

so yeah, in my opinion, the existence of the negative IS positive all in itself.

and i have learned to see that the "flaws" that different people posses, are not flaws at all. because what that "flaw" imprints on that individuals character is far more positive than the abscence of the flaw itself would ever be. yah?

heres my little quotey quote that i feel pertains...
"only pain reveals pleasure. only tears teach us true joy. and only hell exposes our souls. "
 
I've learned to make fun of my Crohn's whenever I felt lousy. I write songs or poems about what I'm going through or have gone through during my life such as the 12 pains of Crohns, the 12 pains of a hospital, rocking around the porcelain God, letter to my hubby, etc. oh, and my favorite, a Crohnie's prayer that I did post under poems here for all to read.

Humor therapy is the best medicine when it comes to coping. I do have bad days at times especially when I have bowel obstructions as the pain gets so bad to the point where I want to be put out of my misery & I know that I will have to be in the hospital for a few days until it passes.

I am grateful though for the ostomy support group b/c if I didn't have my ileostomy, I never would have met my BFF, Linda, of 20+ years who's running the ostomy group for me now until I can get the ok to drive at night (it's a stroke thing). She has been there for me so many times I can't tell you esp. when I had severe blockages and she drove over 1 1/2 hrs. to take me to the ER!!! That is a true friend. She is the older sister I never had. I have younger sister but she's never been supportive when we were growing up.

It takes "guts" to go through what we Crohnies have to deal with daily.
 
I'm not a 100% optimistic...but about 98% so, yes (it would have been 99.5% before last year, lol, but it was a challenging year and I'm still recovering!). For me, the key in enjoying each day is to take pleasure in small things ("I love the sound of the rain!"), to find adventure around every corner ("Let's sign up for this art workshop!"), and to never, ever, develop TOTS (Taking Ourselves Too Seriously). This is something I've learned from my studies in health psychology, and practising it has helped me to be thankful for the "fun" to be found in each day. I think these habits fit well overall with my personal faith, too, as it helps me with being content in every circumstance.
Odds are good that there will always be one or two people who do not like you, but for me the key is to show patience and kindness to those people, and to try not to take it personally...unless they're reacting against something that I really do need to change, in which case it's an opportunity to learn and do better next time. But I agreed that I've been amused at my ability to make friends with people from many walks of life now -- whereas in the past sometimes I struggled just to have a very few friends. If positivity is presented as a deliberate choice rather than as flakiness, many people will see that you are sincere and will respond in kind.
 
a song just for my crohnie friends

I'll share my song Rocking Around the Porcelain God even though I usually sing it at Christmas and it drives my husband crazy but I don't care.

Rocking around the porcelain God
At the Christmas party hop
toilet paper hung where you can see
Every Crohnie tries to stop

You will get a sentimental feeling when you hear Crohnies saying "I gotta go potty"
Deck the halls with rolls of Scotty. Rocking around the porcelain God
Have a happy holiday. Everyone's dancing merrily in the new old fashioned way

Rocking around the porcelain god
let the christmas spirit ring
later on we'll drink some Boost
and then we'll do some caroling

You will get a sentimental feeling when you hear Crohnies saying "I gotta go potty!!"
Deck the halls with rolls of Scotty!!
Rocking around the porcelain god
have a happy holiday
everyone's dancing merrily in the new old fashioned way!!


(GW takes a bow and says please, please no applause--just throw cash----kidding kidding. hope you enjoy my song!!) :D:D:D
 
Lmao love the song!!

I'm generally a happy cheery person even when I really don't wanna be at work because at the end of the day you shouldn't exactly take your bad mood out on the people around, which a lot of people do! After my last flare I am so much more appreciative of everything, eating, going out you name it!

I think it is a very difficult thing to stay totally positive though when you're going through a harsh flare with crohns because it can totally steal your life away, although next time I flare I will stay a lot more optimistic because whether it's sooner or later I know I'll feel better at some point; as it was my first flare I couldn't see any kind of light at the end of the tunnel.
 
GutlessWonder86 said:
You will get a sentimental feeling when you hear Crohnies saying "I gotta go potty"
Deck the halls with rolls of Scotty.
Click to expand...

bahahahahahahahaha - I totally burst out laughing at this!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm still laughing!!!!!!!!!!!

You need an award for that one!!!!!!!! :medal1:
 
This is a great thread. I'm impressed with EthanPSU that he's learned one of life's "big secrets" at a youung age. I wish I learned this, and retained it.

Some say I'm overly optimistic. Some say I'm a pessimist. To tell you the truth, I don't really know one way or the other. It's better that I don't know because sometimes there tends to be a value judgement attached to optimism ("good") and pessimism ("evil"). The older I get, it seems that things that were at one time certain to me (value judgements) have become less certain today. There are days when I wake up depressed. Those days seem hardly optimistic to me. But are they "good" or "bad", I don't know. I can be depressed, but also be thankful, and I can also be understanding and empathetic, and the odds are I might find I experience "joy" within my day where my outlook is "pessimistic".

I believe that on most days, I'm hopeful and carry a positive disposition toward life and others. On other days, I'll just plead that I'm less hopeful. My disposition is sensitive to physical and emotional pain and distress. Fortunately, I have a brain attached somewhere in the mix, and I'm actually pretty good at using it. On the days where my disposition is less hopeful, I rely on my brain (intellect) more than my feelings and emotions.

Ethan asked this question: "Does anyone else here only view things in a positive way?"

I join him with a definite YES. When my feelings, emotions, and intellect are harmonized to a positive outlook, I'm almost literally "intoxicated". "Blown away", "High on life". When my intellect is the only part of me that can "register" a positive outlook, I'm not quite the "happy camper". But it doesn't take long for me to "get over it".
 
EthanPSU said:
You shouldnt expect the worse. Just expect that what comes along will always have a positive reason for it
Click to expand...

This is what I try to live by, that whatever happens in my life, there is a reason for it and something good has to come out of it. It also helps that I'm religious, but that's typically how I try to be. Now I have my days when I'm down in the dumps, but it usually takes a lot to get me there.
 
Jerman said:
...the ability to consistently shoot sunshine from the schpinter! ....
Click to expand...

LMAO! I needed that laugh!! Thanks Jerman!!

But on a bit of a more serious note (hopefully not TOO serious) I, too, have to echo Jerman's words....

For the most part, when I am feeling good and life is wonderful...I can find a rose in the middle of the ugliest swamp... life is too short to be down and depressed all the time.....

But sometimes (like now) .... a little bit of crap has to come out of that sphincter too... (Sorry...I don't mean to crap on the thread... :redface: )

We do need to accept the fact that crap does happen, but as a very good friend once told me.... sometimes crap makes the best fertilizer and grows the best roses.....

Stay postive.... "With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.....Be cheerful. Strive to be happy."
 
GutlessWonder86 said:
I'll share my song Rocking Around the Porcelain God even though I usually sing it at Christmas and it drives my husband crazy but I don't care.

Rocking around the porcelain God
At the Christmas party hop
toilet paper hung where you can see
Every Crohnie tries to stop

You will get a sentimental feeling when you hear Crohnies saying "I gotta go potty"
Deck the halls with rolls of Scotty. Rocking around the porcelain God
Have a happy holiday. Everyone's dancing merrily in the new old fashioned way

Rocking around the porcelain god
let the christmas spirit ring
later on we'll drink some Boost
and then we'll do some caroling

You will get a sentimental feeling when you hear Crohnies saying "I gotta go potty!!"
Deck the halls with rolls of Scotty!!
Rocking around the porcelain god
have a happy holiday
everyone's dancing merrily in the new old fashioned way!!


(GW takes a bow and says please, please no applause--just throw cash----kidding kidding. hope you enjoy my song!!) :D:D:D
Click to expand...

Wow...and I thought I was the only one who said "I gotta goooo POTTY! LOL!!:lol2:
 
I totally agree. Having a positive outlook is the only thing you can do in life to be happy. You can't choose so many of the things that happen to you in life so you might as well try to see the good in it :) Of course it is difficult sometimes to be positive when things seem to be going really terrible, but for the most part I try to be positive.

The way I see it, God gave me an illness because he knew I could handle it and that I wouldn't lose faith in Him. I feel that someone else might just be angry and say forget it, this is all God's fault and stop really trusting in Him. And for me, the whole purpose of life is to serve God, so for someone not to believe in Him or love Him is FAR worse than me being sick.

I always think to myself, if I wasn't sick somone else would be. And I wouldn't wish sickness on anyone...I'd rather it be me than them.
 
I try to be positive for the most part. It's very hard sometimes though!! I've always lived by the old adage "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." I know...cheesy! lol
 
One thing I see in many of your posts is about religion and god making these things better. All though I support your believes and would never try to say anything against it.

But for me, I dont really believe in religion at all. Dont get me wrong, I do believe that there is something but not anywhere close to the religion that people create. With that said my positivness comes from myself and I enjoy the feeling that I have control
 
I don't know that I find the good in every situation. Some things aren't fair and aren't nice, although I do respect the view that we can learn from our struggles and therefore benefit from them.
Where I do find the good is in each day. Maybe some things that day were awful (ex: felt especially sick), but I had a good conversation with someone, or did something I enjoy, etc.
 
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EthanPSU said:
One thing I see in many of your posts is about religion and god making these things better. All though I support your believes and would never try to say anything against it.

But for me, I dont really believe in religion at all. Dont get me wrong, I do believe that there is something but not anywhere close to the religion that people create. With that said my positiveness comes from myself and I enjoy the feeling that I have control
Click to expand...

Ethan, you present as a very intelligent and confident person IMO that is half the battle in life, believing in yourself and having the brains to work through many of the obstacles life has to offer. Sounds like you have been surrounded by some pretty cool influences in your life. Good for you, I am sure you will be a real asset to the forum by being who you have shown us you are in this thread.

Btw - I am a huge fan of Joe Pa and the Nittany Lions what kind of year do you think they are going to have?
 
EthanPSU said:
One thing I see in many of your posts is about religion and god making these things better. All though I support your believes and would never try to say anything against it.

But for me, I dont really believe in religion at all. Dont get me wrong, I do believe that there is something but not anywhere close to the religion that people create. With that said my positivness comes from myself and I enjoy the feeling that I have control
Click to expand...


totally agree. as i got older and life went on i lost any "faith" that i had in religion of that sort.
but i DO have faith in the order of the world. the universe. that there is an interconnected web of paths and time and that it all fits perfectly. but not that any sort of god is the cause of this.
i dont believe in any sort of divine intervention at all. things happen to us just by chance or because thats what we have chosen. no one chooses for us. life just....happens.

and sometimes i still question it and if there IS a god? i would see him as a supporter in our lives. wanting the best for us but not having the power to fix our problems. not having the power to dish out problems either.

just my views and beliefs that sort of developed as life occured. and i think its a good thing that everyones hearts tells them differently on life's mysteries like this. if we all believed the same thing? that would be strange.
 
EthanPSU said:
One thing I see in many of your posts is about religion and god making these things better. All though I support your believes and would never try to say anything against it.

But for me, I dont really believe in religion at all. Dont get me wrong, I do believe that there is something but not anywhere close to the religion that people create. With that said my positivness comes from myself and I enjoy the feeling that I have control
Click to expand...

What does not kill you makes you stronger.

It is more than just a Corney line from a B movie. I look back at stuff and say, "Whew glad I made it past that". Some of the most difficult things I have had to deal with is the guilt of feeling glad I survived when others did not. I am stronger for having to deal with Crohns disease. Yes I think I look at everything as a positive in the that respect. As long as something is being dealt with I am making progress and growing as a person. Its the crap that does not get get dealt with that tends to bring me down.
 
I know that being positive helps me...but sometimes I can't bring myself to pick it up...my brother (who is a life coach) says stuff like 'it's not what happens but how you look at it' which I think is absolutely true, but I find it really hard to keep my chin up sometimes. Guess I still have quite a bit to learn.
 
EthanPSU said:
One thing I see in many of your posts is about religion and god making these things better. All though I support your believes and would never try to say anything against it.

But for me, I dont really believe in religion at all. Dont get me wrong, I do believe that there is something but not anywhere close to the religion that people create. With that said my positivness comes from myself and I enjoy the feeling that I have control
Click to expand...

Ethan my lovely!
I could've wrote that!
My sentiments exactly!
Each to their own, I say, but everyone is the captain of their own ship, and when days are rough, just think this -
'What is the worst case scenario?'
Then put everything into perspective.
but I have to say this to you Ethan, and don't take offence but
You've still got a lot to learn Young Jedi!
xxxx
 
Astra101 said:
Ethan my lovely!
I could've wrote that!
My sentiments exactly!
Each to their own, I say, but everyone is the captain of their own ship, and when days are rough, just think this -
'What is the worst case scenario?'
Then put everything into perspective.
but I have to say this to you Ethan, and don't take offence but
You've still got a lot to learn Young Jedi!
xxxx
Click to expand...

Hah, Well thanks and I know I still alot to learn but im only 20...duh....hah
 
Astra101 said:
You've still got a lot to learn Young Jedi!
xxxx
Click to expand...

Don't we all Joanie? Don't we all?

Nice thread Ethan!! I love your attitude but remember some of these guys have seen "trials" that others cannot imagine. I myself was traveling through life w/o a care in the world until my youngest child was struck with this disease and psc. Your philosophy can change in a heartbeat...trust me!!
 
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Your philosophy can change in a heartbeat...trust me!!
Click to expand...
Hmmm...Im not too sure of that. Ive had alot of bad happen too me. Maybe I would get stunned for a little bit but would not change completely
Click to expand...

This is an interseting question Ethan. I can understand where Dexky is coming from as a parent but I also understand where you are coming from as Roo seems to have a very similar outlook to you. Roo has also been through a lot at young age and I don't for a minute suggest that she wouldn't or won't go through down times in her life but her personality is such, that I would be surprised in a way, if she were down for too long. As your last sentence states - I would get stunned for a little bit but would not change completely. I guess time will tell. :wink:

All the best,
Dusty
 
I tend to be a more positive thinker when someone else is feeling down because I want everyone to be happy. I enjoy cheering people up and its usually through humor. After they aren't feeling as down, they're easier to talk to about the positive side of things and become more accepting. When things happen to me, I just try to take my punches as they come and I wait to react until I know everything there is to know. No point in fretting over things that aren't or wont happen. But when I'm really REALLY down, I find something positive to do like color my hair and get a hair cut. A new looking me always makes me feel better.
 

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