Do your friends ask to see your stoma?

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happypanda

Joined
Dec 16, 2011
Messages
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I'm a Chinese Medicine student and therefore have a lot of friends that are TCM students as well. It's been great to have friends ask to see Berry and not treat me as different, or ignore that I have had this major surgery. It makes my new normal seem like the old normal. I think Berry kinda enjoys the attention, if they are lucky it will dance for them:).
It's actually been funny for me to see all the ways that they try to ask to see Berry with out actually asking. I usually get to ask them if they want to see it.
I have half wondered if I'll be the Western Pathology guinea pig when they get to Crohn's....
 
happypanda said:
I'm a Chinese Medicine student and therefore have a lot of friends that are TCM students as well. It's been great to have friends ask to see Berry and not treat me as different, or ignore that I have had this major surgery. It makes my new normal seem like the old normal. I think Berry kinda enjoys the attention, if they are lucky it will dance for them:).
It's actually been funny for me to see all the ways that they try to ask to see Berry with out actually asking. I usually get to ask them if they want to see it.
I have half wondered if I'll be the Western Pathology guinea pig when they get to Crohn's....
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LOL... no as of yet no1 has asked to see Road Runner :yfrown:
He never behaves though so its best that way :shifty-t:

I also do not wear a clear pouch so would have to take the whole thing off :cool:
 
I've shown Oscar to most of my friends. They were all curious and supportive, so I figured what the heck! No one ran screaming and they're all still my friends...lol And now they have a good idea of what I live with every day.
 
Only one friend has ever seen my bag, but no one besides my sister who was helping me at first has seen my actual stoma. and none of them have asked to see it, 1 or 2 friends have an idea of what it is but I still don't think they quite get it. Sometimes I'd like show them so they can see it for themselves so they might realise what I live with and that there's a reason I act the way I do at times... particularly when playing football etc
I get the impression my friends who i play football with think im just being soft for not wanting to go in goal or not being physical enough, and I know it's because I don't want anyone barging into my stomach or having a football hit me, so at times like that it is really frustrating.
 
No one has seen Stan. I showed my so called partner Grahame (just the bag, not Stan) in the hospital once. As he's never asked to see me or Stan again neked since...oh well.
 
Terriernut said:
No one has seen Stan. I showed my so called partner Grahame (just the bag, not Stan) in the hospital once. As he's never asked to see me or Stan again neked since...oh well.
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Misty,
ARE You serious NOT you naked HUH.... thats awful WTH ugh... I hope you dumped him?
Man my husband drives me nuts wanting me naked lol...
I was emptying the other night and he wanted to brush his teeth EWWWWWWW:kiss: true love I guess he said well its just part of you like when you are sitting on the toilet ummm... hello dear when I use to poo which was once every 60 days if I was lucky you did not brush your teeth lol...:rof:
 
Yes, I'm serious. At my age I shouldnt be surprised. That part of my life is over I'm afraid.
 
Terriernut said:
No one has seen Stan. I showed my so called partner Grahame (just the bag, not Stan) in the hospital once. As he's never asked to see me or Stan again neked since...oh well.
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What a jerk! Hearing that makes me a sad panda.
I would hope that when I meet someone and explain the Stoma situation they would understand. After all Berry has saved my life allowing me to get out and meet new people.
I hope that you find someone that isn't bothered by Stan!
 
AMEN....
And Misty will look @ that smile karma baby is what I say ugh makes me a sad Panda too ....
As you can see I love Panda's mine is dancing @ the bottom lol...

You are not old Misty what are you 30??
Geez I am going to be 43 and I am not old... I mean I know my belly dancing is over lol.. and my bikini days ( but hell I am SO GLAD for that ) shhhhhh... dont tell hubby he loves hem I HATE them lol...

I know I have some confidence issues with hubby now but he could care less what is there he just wanted to do it lol... :yfaint:
We have been together since we were 15 so I know this is huge for him to see me with a whole new body honestly the hernia bothers me more then Road Runner :(
 
It's kind of funny that this convo just came up. A friend of ours that actually hasn't asked to see Oscar just asked us the other day what he looks like...my fiance said he looks like "a little brain with a dollop of poo in the middle"...lol My friend didn't want see him after that...I nearly died laughing!
 
giftedbyadoption said:
Misty,
ARE You serious NOT you naked HUH.... thats awful WTH ugh... I hope you dumped him?
Man my husband drives me nuts wanting me naked lol...
I was emptying the other night and he wanted to brush his teeth EWWWWWWW:kiss: true love I guess he said well its just part of you like when you are sitting on the toilet ummm... hello dear when I use to poo which was once every 60 days if I was lucky you did not brush your teeth lol...:rof:
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lol, my daughter might be having surgery for a ileostomy soon. I am going to have to help her name it. Typically a man for woman and a woman for a man? It is like a car.
 
Myreinhard said:
lol, my daughter might be having surgery for a ileostomy soon. I am going to have to help her name it. Typically a man for woman and a woman for a man? It is like a car.
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I am sad your little girl will go through this :yfrown:
But I was just talking about this yesterday on another post .... how I am not sure if I am thankful I didnt as a child or angry :shifty-t:
I lived 42 years in pain and the last 10 with a terrible time eating anything and would end up in bed in the couch after eating pretty much everyday.

I pray for your little one I was 2 when my tummy issues began god bless her :ghug:
 
Thanks for the prayers. I'll take them. Doing a lot of research on here about stomas. Seems like a way better situation then beingin cronic pain for a lifetime. Hoping it is UC and Crohns is not hiding in her guts somewhere. Take care.
 
Myreinhard said:
Thanks for the prayers. I'll take them. Doing a lot of research on here about stomas. Seems like a way better situation then beingin cronic pain for a lifetime. Hoping it is UC and Crohns is not hiding in her guts somewhere. Take care.
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Me too....
I didnt have crohns I had I had IBS and colonic inertia/ Colonic Dysmotility.....
So it would have helped me to have it as a child.
Keep us posted ...
 
Misty is one hot piece of ass and I'm positive lots of peeps want to see her nakie. Just putting that out there!

But no, no one wants to see mine including my bf!
 
"You are not old Misty what are you 30??"

30? More like almost 50, but thank you!

And Michelle...you are very sweet!!! And I'm afraid that Ollie is so big again now that nakedness would frighten anyone!
 
Misty.. You forget that men mainly look in another area!!!

Lizz.. No, he's not. He doesn't mind my bag at all but seeing my stoma is something entirely different. He didn't want to see my colonoscopy pics either!! I'd rather he tell me he doesn't want to see it than get freaked out by looking at it.
 
BF are intimidated by stomas generally speaking!
And Michelle is HOT. But I bet BF wants her all well first.

Stomas are trash talkin, givin it **** large, big men on the block sorts. Mostly, they should be covered up. We wouldnt want them to get MORE attitude after all!
 
Misty-Eyed said:
Misty.. You forget that men mainly look in another area!!!

Lizz.. No, he's not. He doesn't mind my bag at all but seeing my stoma is something entirely different. He didn't want to see my colonoscopy pics either!! I'd rather he tell me he doesn't want to see it than get freaked out by looking at it.
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Ya I guess.... has he seen you deliver a baby yet?? LOL... because once thats seen a stoma is a piece of cake my hubby says. Or Sinus surgery he said , that poor many saw me go through 5 sinus surgery's and and 10 feet of packing to see all that packing come out and all my sinus inurts I guess he figures a small brain is nothing :ylol: he thinks the stoma is a mini brain lol...

My son was to big for me and when I pushed him out my tail bone just snapped so he has seen it all and he is a very squeamish man to had to put his head between his legs so he wouldnt faint before he cut the cord :lol2: MEN.... big chickens they are ....
 
Nope, my folks and SO have seen my stoma (Jace - which means Healer) but that's about it. Most of my friends know about Jace but they're pretty respectful about him, I'd probably show him if they asked! But in general, most people don't even notice.

Misty, I'm sure you'll find that guy who doesn't mind your stoma, I just know he's out there!
 
giftedbyadoption said:
Ya I guess.... has he seen you deliver a baby yet?? LOL... because once thats seen a stoma is a piece of cake my hubby says. Or Sinus surgery he said , that poor many saw me go through 5 sinus surgery's and and 10 feet of packing to see all that packing come out and all my sinus inurts I guess he figures a small brain is nothing :ylol: he thinks the stoma is a mini brain lol...

My son was to big for me and when I pushed him out my tail bone just snapped so he has seen it all and he is a very squeamish man to had to put his head between his legs so he wouldnt faint before he cut the cord :lol2: MEN.... big chickens they are ....
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lol noooo I am childfree! I'd have to have a c-section with all my problems down there anyway! But wow, your husband is a brave man! And so are you for going through that! Thumbs up to you both!
 
AlliD511 said:
Misty, I'm sure you'll find that guy who doesn't mind your stoma, I just know he's out there!
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Not sure if you were refering to me or the other Misty, but I am very happy with the guy I have right now, even if he doesn't want to see my stoma. He sat in the hospital for over 9 hours by himself when I had my op and he drove nearly an hour to see me everyday while I was in hospital. He also takes time off work to take me to my appoinments and lets me cry mascara on is cream jumpers when I get bad news. He may not want to see my stoma but he's still a keeper.

Oh, and once he came for a walk with me up the ward till I had blood dripping down my leg. He dealt with that pretty well considering, getting me towels to wipe it with! Haha!
 
Pretty SURE she meant Misty you are Michelle correct but Misty eyes??
He sounds great :)
And honey if you can do the stoma surgery a C-section is nothing :)
 
I can't really recall anyone wanting to see Jeb, he's a handsome fellow, I don't know why anyone wouldn't want to see him. Frankly, I am mad that no one has asked! My wife isn't scared of him. She usually comes into the bathroom while I am changing him and hang out with me. What a great way to hang out on a Saturday night for her, huh?
 
Didn't know we should name them ... Dh is still embarrassed about his. I find it fascinating, haven't had a change to properly examine it, the nurses get a little peeved everytime I open the sheets and start examining their patient lol! I did promise the kids they can put stickers on dads bag everyday when he comes home!
 
Misty-Eyed said:
Not sure if you were refering to me or the other Misty, but I am very happy with the guy I have right now, even if he doesn't want to see my stoma. He sat in the hospital for over 9 hours by himself when I had my op and he drove nearly an hour to see me everyday while I was in hospital. He also takes time off work to take me to my appoinments and lets me cry mascara on is cream jumpers when I get bad news. He may not want to see my stoma but he's still a keeper.

Oh, and once he came for a walk with me up the ward till I had blood dripping down my leg. He dealt with that pretty well considering, getting me towels to wipe it with! Haha!
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Michelle, you have a 'Keeper'!!!! What a guy!
 
kossy said:
I can't really recall anyone wanting to see Jeb, he's a handsome fellow, I don't know why anyone wouldn't want to see him. Frankly, I am mad that no one has asked! My wife isn't scared of him. She usually comes into the bathroom while I am changing him and hang out with me. What a great way to hang out on a Saturday night for her, huh?
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lol... :)
 
Hi

I have had an ileostomy for about 12 years and my friends have never asked to see my stoma. Infact, I have only actually told a handful of very close friends that I have one. Many of my friends and all of my work colleagues (I'm a nurse) have absolutely no idea I have a stoma. For me personally, I have adopted an approach that the less people that know, the better it is for me. I'm not embarrassed about it, I just don't feel in any way inclined to tell people.

On a side note, I like the fact that many of you here seem to have personalised your stoma.
 
I have decided to change the name of my stoma I am up @ 3am every morning for some reason he seems to think he has to be taken care of at that ungodly hour EVERYDAY since my surgery :( so I was siting here since 3am because by the time I empty my pouch and such I am WIDE awake gee 3am AGAIN hmmmm..... what could I name him that has to do with the # 3 because he obviously LIKES 3 lol...:ylol:

I came up with Clover for 3 leaf clover :lol2:
So welcome Clover now watch tomorrow he will change his time to 2am lol... to bad his name is staying this time. I figure since its only been 3 weeks he has had the name he wont mind a change this early in :ybatty:
 
I have 3 people making a list of things they want me to eat so they can see what it looks like coming out. Too funny!
 
I've offered a few people, only two have taken me up. We were talking about it and I said it was squishy and they couple poke at it through the bag, they did and thanked me for the chance.
 
2thFairy said:
I have 3 people making a list of things they want me to eat so they can see what it looks like coming out. Too funny!
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You'd have to sit around all day though to wait for it!

I was changing my bag last night when I noticed something looking like string coming out of it. I pulled it out and it was an undigested grain of rice! lol looked like my stoma was giving birth to a maggot. Gross.
 
2thFairy said:
If I eat Wheat Nuts, they start showing up within 30 minutes.
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If I eat anything it takes from 7 min to 1 hour. Guess I wont get fat eh? And I only have my sigmoid out! Apparently my bowels think it's a race!? It's called rapid dumping (hheheheee) and the 'cure'?....high fiber. Right.
 
Exactly! Everything passes out quickly, I just mentioned Wheat Nuts in particular because they float to the top of the bag. That's how I am certain things are going through too fast. I had chips at lunch today and 45 minutes later I see them floating around.

Oh, and I did make the mistake of eating ONE small beet. Twenty minutes later I thought I had a bag full of blood.

These are just a few of the many reasons why I think having a stoma is really cool. I am entertained on a daily basis!
 
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Haha eating beetroot is the best for the blood in a bag look!

I got 'naughty' with my bf for the 3rd time since my op last night and mt stoma gave a lovely loud fart right when things were pretty hot. Luckily the bf never heard it but I was still annoyed at my stoma for not letting me know it's there. The bag crinkling noises are bad enough, yet alone farts lol.
 
He gets the rest of his jabs next week, and then he'll be ready for 'Primetime'! And ready to meet the world, if the world is ready? So give him another week or two, and come on over!
 
Terriernut said:
If I eat anything it takes from 7 min to 1 hour. Guess I wont get fat eh? And I only have my sigmoid out! Apparently my bowels think it's a race!? It's called rapid dumping (hheheheee) and the 'cure'?....high fiber. Right.
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my stoma nurse has not to eat fiber on my list of foods she said it causes blockages??...
everything comes right out on me :( especially my ensures at 1st they scares me because they are dark choc I thought i had internal bleeding with a bag full of black liquid lol...
 
Ummm back to the original question (you guys are a bunch of nuts, or is it nutters over there?? I love your candor guys!!!) only my fiance and my daughter, she's 7, have wanted to see it so far. I laughed so hard when Steve saw it for the first time he was shocked at how big the hole was......and then asked me what the red plug was made out of........ He thought the stomach was a plug that I could remove!!!!!! Lol
 

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