I want some food!!!

[Pincushion]

and I want someone to actually care about it!! FFS!

It's not bloody easy doing a liquid diet (modulen) for weeks on end

everyone else is coping fine with me doing it - wow arent they troopers!!

God i am a crabby cow today!

:grumpy:

 

[MapleLeafGirl]

I don't blame you. I can't imagine what you must be going through. I have read your other posts about the modulen and have been thinking of you. I haven't ever had to do that so I can't offer any tips

 

[Pincushion]

Thanks Kelly.

OMG I am even crosser now!!!

my husband has just said to me that he is considering how nice it would be to eat steak and chips (he thinks it is funny to taunt me!!) How in the hell is that helpful!!

And if i say something then apparently I am being unreasonable and cranky!!

Can't win

 

[Lisa]

You can always tell him you will gladly place that steak and chips in a location where he will find out how it feels to have them come out looking the same as they went in!!!!!

 

[Pincushion]

LOL!!

Oh btw I ate a fly today and my first thought was uh oh I bet thats not allowed on my liquid diet!! LOL!! wtf?! gross!!

it was accidental btw! LOL!!

 

[Crohn's 35]

How long do you have to stay on the modulen? Why cant you have some kind of food?

 

[Pincushion]

Penny, I am on the modulen for at least 6 weeks (5 more to go)

Can't have any food at all as my bowel needs total rest and the modulen is a complete food and you are not to eat whilst doing it, unless it is being used as a supplement.

 

[MisB]

I'm going to show my ignorance now.....what is modulen? I myself have been on pretty much liquid/soft diet since April 7th, so I know how you feel. The most solid thing I have eaten during the last 3 months is some soft cooked chicken and turkey. My main things now are Ensure drinks, mashed potatos, soft cooked pasta, baby food and liquids. When I've tried more solid food the pain has been intolerable. Sometimes I still cook for my family which is my husband, mother, and 19 yr old daughter, but most days they have to fend for themselves. I'm blessed that they missed me during my hospital stays and are very understanding and supportive. I am so sorry your husband taunts you. I like Pasobuf's idea. Sometime's it's very hard for others to really understand what's going on. Just hang in there and keep letting it out here. I've vented here a lot lately and it really helps. I hope you start feeling better soon!!!! And in the mean time, tell everyone else to :kissgrits:

 

[Crohn's 35]

5 more to go? Whoa. I couldn't do that, love my food too much. Will it help you gain weight? Sorry I am with Bev, never had to be on it.

You need a group hug...:ghug:

 

[Pincushion]

Aw thanks :hug:

Modulen is a powder that you mix with water. I can only have that and very diluted squash/water. No food, not blended, not liquid form or soft at all.

Modulen does help to put on weight as well. They can adjust the amount you have to fit your own requirements.

Here is more info on Modulen and it's benefits for Crohn's

http://www.nestlenutrition.co.uk/healthcare/gb/health_concerns/idb/Pages/IBDbenefitsofliquiddiet.aspx

I LOVE food and this is really hard but so far i'm doing ok, just have moments where it feels like torture, especially if I think about the length of time left. I am just taking it day by day and some days are better than others.

I am really craving savoury foods and would love some crisps right now....

Urgh and right across BBQ season as well!!

Overall my husband is very good but boy does he drop the odd clanger which really irks me! Love him :wub: lol!

 

[MisB]

I don't know if this will help or not, but instead of counting the days you have left, count the days you have accomplished. I'm a recovering alcoholic and when I quit drinking I was counting to my 90 days clean and sober. It drove me nuts until I reversed the logic. Instead of 52 days left, I looked at it as 38 days already done and 38 days without a hangover. So, count your accomplishments and that you are making progress. You have made it a whole week! Wow! :congratualtions: Hopefully it's controlling your pain as well. One day at a time, one minute at a time, and if you can't handle food in front of you, walk away. You can do this!!!!!!

 

[Cat-a-Tonic]

Christina, I am with Pen and Bev in that I have never been on a liquid diet before - the link you posted was very interesting. Is Modulen something that your doctor gives you or can you just buy it over the counter? I'd almost be tempted to have something like that on hand for those days when I just cannot stomach solid foods. What does it taste like?

I really like Bev's idea about counting how many days you've accomplished so far. And I think you should make your husband taste some of your Modulen so he knows what you're going through - and if he eats in front of you or teases you, just walk away and go into another room. You don't need to put up with that when you're already dealing with so much!

 

[Pincushion]

Thanks Beverly, that is definately a good way of looking at it

Modulen was prescribed to me. I am not sure if you can buy it, but know it is very expensive. But my prescription is £7.20 per item and they issued me with 20cans to start off with which is about half of what I will need in total, so saved me a fortune!!

It tastes very sweet. Meant to be vanilla flavour but you can flavour it with nesquik/crusha. I hated it at first and almost couldn't drink it, but now i actually enjoy drinking it (very weird) I have it with chocolate nesquik and it now taste like a creamy chocolate milkshake to me LOL!! Never thought I would be saying that!!

Coping well today :hug:

 

[crohnicaly stinky]

Christina wow that stinks! Is there any chance you can freeze drinks, like a sports drink or something and then eat the ice cubes? I know it's not food, but maybe it can help give you some feeling that you are actually eating something solid. Hang in there!

 

[Guest555]

I couldn't follow this diet for 6 weeks! One week? Maybe. Just!

 

[Pincushion]

Day 10

Thanks everyone :hug:

I can freeze it. Only thing i can't do it have it warm as heat kills off the anti inflammatory ingredient.

I am struggling again today. Probably not helped by the time of the month (sorry tmi)

Really would love some fresh bread, brie and a glass of red wine....

I do have to say though, I am pleased I am on day 10 already! YAY me!

Now just need cuddles, a soppy film and a hot water bottle and for my daughter to let me rest for a minute - ahhh dream on!! lol!!

 

[Walt]

...braving a hard road

Hi Christina,
Congrats on showing strength and determination for 10 days!

Is fly eating cheating? Gave me a chuckle at the hint of how hard it is not to eat.... and how much we'd like what we cannot have...

I lived on liquids for a couple months this year.
Mostly Ensure and the ubiquitous thin pouch soup.
Beyond that I later added a blender shake with ensure, protein whey powder, yogurt and Carnation instant breakfast powder.(=multivitamin dust?)
I was feeling panic about getting and/or absorbing decent nutrition.
I blended in icecubes to make it thicker and colder.

During this time, I found other people to be not much help.
Some mean well, but cannot help. Others seem to find it amusing,
although I wanna think they just cannot deal with how they cannot help even though they care about you.
No matter how you cut the mustard, It's just you, and your thoughts and cravings.

For me, I suffered enough with my Crohn's to get here:
Whatever I suffer in treatments and proceedures, is not as bad as what I have suffered from Crohn's disease.
Memories of laying on the floor, holding my guts, moaning and begging for mercy for helpless hours at a time are never far from me.
I paid full price for those lessons and insight.

Crohn's is boss.
I fear my Crohn's more than snakes.
It can stop my clock suddenly and without warning.(hold my calls, I'll be in the Loo 'til further notice)
I fear my Crohn's more than anything.
And am always aware... the wolf is always at the door.
I hope you can find strength to endure there. Works for me.

One brutal flaring night I jotted this in my journal:
when you think you can't... that is when you must

I see on the Nestle link, they claim modulen is great tasting.
Care to share your thoughts on that?

I admire your courage to attempt a difficult and non-drug approach to obtain remission. I am leary of drugs, but currently full of them.
good luck with your bowel rest and hang in there,
We are stronger than we realize.
we are rooting for you,
Walt

ps It stings me, when someone invariably states that they could never give up (blank). It is an all-too-common reaction from non-sick folks.
When you are painted into a difficult corner, you can and will do whatever you can to ease your suffering and fight for your life.
I hope they never need to find that out.
I would not wish bowel disease on anyone!

 

[Jennifer]

Hey Christina. I know how you feel as I had to be on a liquid diet for over a month (almost 2) when I was first diagnosed at age 9. I was kept in the hospital the whole time with IV fluids with tea, jello and broth everyday. At first it was fun to pick out the few flavors they offered but after a while I just wanted to throw that stuff across the room. I used to play with playdough and make an entire thanksgiving dinner out of it (small scale) and call the nurses in to look at my creation. They loved the melted butter on top of the mashed potatoes. My parents also ate in my room fairly often as they were sleeping in the same room with me so I was never really alone except for when they'd go out on walks and their food would be delivered without them there. Sometimes I'd get out of bed, unplug my IV and walk over to their plates of food and sneak a bite out of each plate of food so they matched and then hurried back into bed and plug myself back in. No one ever knew and I didn't get sick from it either, granted this didn't happen very often. Best thing to do is occupy your time with something so you aren't thinking about food as much, keep food out of sight (I find it rude if anyone eats in front of you), if you can have multiple flavors of broth and tea and jello I'd suggest that cause variety will keep you sane. Good luck to ya. It'll be over before you know it.

 

[Silvermoon]

Hey Christina...hope things are going well.

I have never done Modulen, but when I was younger (about 13 I think) I had a feeding tube... for pretty much the same reason...put the bowel to rest and see if it heals a bit. I was allowed to drink water, suck on hard candies, and eat the occasional popcicle, but other than that I could have nothing by mouth. It was horrible.

But I loved Beverly's idea of counting the days you have accomplished already, and I see you are doing that! Way to go! I never thought of looking at things that way before, but what a great idea!

And don't worry about venting here....that is what we are for....to listen and give cyberhugs...:ghug::ghug::ghug::ghug::ghug::ghug:

:hang:

 

[Astra]

:congratualtions: Christina!

sooooooooooooooooooooooo proud of you!
your will power is so strong
xxxxx

 

[Rebecca85]

Glad to hear you are doing a bit better and starting to enjoy the modulen!

 

[Entchen]

Hi Christina! You're doing really well to make it this long AND to start to enjoy it. (Better tasting than the fly? There once was a lady who swallowed a fly... my oh my, she swallowed a fly!) I put myself on a liquid diet for a while after reading about the potential benefits. Symptoms were quite bad, and although I'd been unofficially diagnosed, I had to get through a wait of 8 weeks duration before colonoscopy (official diagnosis), which was the point at which I could start on meds. For what it's worth, doing the all-fluids diet (Ensure) made a world of difference for me. Not everyone sees a huge benefit, but my understanding is that *many people see some benefit* from the bowel rest, so I hope that you will, too.

 

[Keona]

ewe...you ate a fly?....haha... I would have at least reached for a grasshopper... would last a little longer..more like actual "food"...
Hope things are going well...what day are you on now? You have amazing strength to do this

 

[MisB]

Hey Christina, Haven't been here much for a couple of days. Do you still have flies on your menu? It's funny what we'll do when we are desparate. :lol:

:hang: and remember we are all here for you. I'm proud of you!!!!! :hug:

 

[Pincushion]

thanks all for your support :hug:

I am now on day 22!! Over halfway! If you havent seen it I am writing a modulen journey in the food and diet section so any updates are now in there.

Thanks all so much for listening to my rant :hug:

and Bev - no no more flies :lol:

 

[crohnicaly stinky]

Over halfway? That's great! This has to be very hard, I hope that is some way you get used to it, as unlikely as that seems. I'll check out your journal. Keep up the great effort Christina!

 

[chops]

Hey well done Christina!!! I thought I had to do it tough when I was on the Ensure diet for 10 days, let alone 6 weeks like you :eek2: I used to just lock myself in the bedroom whenever dinner was served and sip on my frozen Ensure and cry (no-one will ever understand how hard it is to give up something like food until they are forced to)...... Hang in there and good luck!!!

 

[silver]

Wow I couldn't do a liquid diet! The closest I came was six days on nil by mouth in hospital. You're very brave and doing fantastically! Keep it up Pin! :hug: