- Joined
- Jan 12, 2015
- Messages
- 1
Hi!
So, following more than three years of defiantly (and stupidly) burying my head in the sand, I have decided to finally face up to my diagnosis. I've visited this site as a voyeur several times, but never felt sufficiently 'Crohn's-y' to feel I had any right posting here. However, after waking up to a dull ache in my abdomen for over 1000 days I figured I have little left to gain from solitude and ignorance. This is the first time I have reflected upon my 'story' with anyone - including myself - so forgive me if I drone on: it's news to me, too!
I was diagnosed with an IBD in November 2011, aged 22, at the fourth time of asking. This followed three misdiagnoses, including constipation and a damaged stomach lining. I have since forgotten the third misdiagnosis; processing Latin-sounding words from an uncaring stranger at 5 a.m., having been vomiting every fifteen minutes for eight hours, pales into insignificance when one is experiencing for the first time the taste of regurgitated faeces. Anyway, I digress.
I say 'IBD' as I am unsure whether I have been diagnosed with Crohn's disease or Crohn's colitis or ulcerative colitis. Again, my mind was elsewhere as the nurse/doctor discussed my colonoscopy - I was still perfectly high from the drugs. My mum's brain seems to be easily influenced and highly revisionist, so her account of the conversation can rapidly mutate with simple questioning. I've attended biannual outpatient appointments but the subject of my diagnosis has never came up. I just haven't cared. I take my medication (pentasa) inconsistently, as it seems to have little, if any, effect.
The crux is this: I have so adamantly avoided learning about my condition that, 3 years in, I have no idea whether I am doing anything drastically wrong or remotely right. It took me two years to realise I had been enveloped by depression, and I have no idea whether this is a common effect of the condition or completely unrelated. I am hopeful that the members here can help me better understand the nuances of my condition, and that I can offer any advice or support to others. If anyone has managed to read this far, may I ask a few questions (I don't know if this is the right place):
- my ileum is the apparent area of concern, and the corresponding area emits a dull ache almost constantly, and is often sore to the touch when I press down on it. Is this a common symptom or something I should take more seriously?
- I consume, on average, two bottles of whisky each month, often going through more than half a bottle in one sitting. Other than the obvious physiological risks, is this particularly risky with an IBD?
- Does the feeling of being inadequate - something of a biological failure - ever subside? It has severely knocked my confidence and I can't seem to shake the feeling of embarrassment whenever it comes up in social situations.
Thank you very much for taking the time to read this, I have missed out a lot of information but it is already far too long. I hope my flippancy towards our shared condition does not offend anyone. I feel as though I am extremely lucky to only have what appear to be mild symptoms, and I feel somewhat unworthy of posting here.
Thanks again and nice to meet you,
Rikki
So, following more than three years of defiantly (and stupidly) burying my head in the sand, I have decided to finally face up to my diagnosis. I've visited this site as a voyeur several times, but never felt sufficiently 'Crohn's-y' to feel I had any right posting here. However, after waking up to a dull ache in my abdomen for over 1000 days I figured I have little left to gain from solitude and ignorance. This is the first time I have reflected upon my 'story' with anyone - including myself - so forgive me if I drone on: it's news to me, too!
I was diagnosed with an IBD in November 2011, aged 22, at the fourth time of asking. This followed three misdiagnoses, including constipation and a damaged stomach lining. I have since forgotten the third misdiagnosis; processing Latin-sounding words from an uncaring stranger at 5 a.m., having been vomiting every fifteen minutes for eight hours, pales into insignificance when one is experiencing for the first time the taste of regurgitated faeces. Anyway, I digress.
I say 'IBD' as I am unsure whether I have been diagnosed with Crohn's disease or Crohn's colitis or ulcerative colitis. Again, my mind was elsewhere as the nurse/doctor discussed my colonoscopy - I was still perfectly high from the drugs. My mum's brain seems to be easily influenced and highly revisionist, so her account of the conversation can rapidly mutate with simple questioning. I've attended biannual outpatient appointments but the subject of my diagnosis has never came up. I just haven't cared. I take my medication (pentasa) inconsistently, as it seems to have little, if any, effect.
The crux is this: I have so adamantly avoided learning about my condition that, 3 years in, I have no idea whether I am doing anything drastically wrong or remotely right. It took me two years to realise I had been enveloped by depression, and I have no idea whether this is a common effect of the condition or completely unrelated. I am hopeful that the members here can help me better understand the nuances of my condition, and that I can offer any advice or support to others. If anyone has managed to read this far, may I ask a few questions (I don't know if this is the right place):
- my ileum is the apparent area of concern, and the corresponding area emits a dull ache almost constantly, and is often sore to the touch when I press down on it. Is this a common symptom or something I should take more seriously?
- I consume, on average, two bottles of whisky each month, often going through more than half a bottle in one sitting. Other than the obvious physiological risks, is this particularly risky with an IBD?
- Does the feeling of being inadequate - something of a biological failure - ever subside? It has severely knocked my confidence and I can't seem to shake the feeling of embarrassment whenever it comes up in social situations.
Thank you very much for taking the time to read this, I have missed out a lot of information but it is already far too long. I hope my flippancy towards our shared condition does not offend anyone. I feel as though I am extremely lucky to only have what appear to be mild symptoms, and I feel somewhat unworthy of posting here.
Thanks again and nice to meet you,
Rikki