Limericks: Rhyme a Line at a Time

[Trysha]

There once was a mouse in the house

 

[Wallath]

that roared so loud....

 

[MADiMarc]

That was really a bit of a souse,

 

[Trysha]

That wonderful mouse in the house!

 

[Trysha]

There was an old man with a dog

 

[Robert747]

who both got lost in the fog

 

[Grumbletum]

As they blundered about

 

[MADiMarc]

They started to tout

 

[Gra]

Ther once was a fellow named Kevin

 

[scottsma]

They started to tout

lifes really such a hard slog

 

[scottsma]

Ther once was a fellow named Kevin

whose feet were size nine and a seven

 

[Robert747]

to stop him walking in a circle all day

 

[scottsma]

he stuffed the "seven"with hay

 

[Grumbletum]

Now strolling about is just heaven

 

[Robert747]

Busty Betty was full of fun

 

[MADiMarc]

She just adored a good pun

 

[Aura]

She'd laugh and bounce

 

[Trysha]

And flounce and trounce

 

[Aura]

And skip off in to the sun

 

[scottsma]

Nimble Nick was awfully quick

 

[Robert747]

so for the Olympics was a clever pick

 

[scottsma]

But he lost his new shorts

 

[sawdust]

and there were media reports,

 

[scottsma]

He was chasing a builder called Rick

 

[Grumbletum]

Now Rick he was a strapping lad

 

[scottsma]

and was known as a bit of a cad

 

[Grumbletum]

So he led poor Nick on

 

[scottsma]

and then he was gone

 

[MADiMarc]

Now isn't that really too sad.

 

[Robert747]

Saucy Sarah liked the seaside

 

[scottsma]

behind an icecream she would hide

 

[MADiMarc]

From her old flame

 

[Grumbletum]

Wearing her polka dot bikini

 

[scottsma]

and her purple wooly beany

 

[Grumbletum]

You couldn't really miss her if you tried

 

[scottsma]

When Murray went out for a curry

 

[Grumbletum]

He opted for a restaurant in Surrey

 

[Aura]

Choosing the vindaloo,

 

[Robert747]

Hot enough to melt an igloo

 

[Grumbletum]

He sure ran for the restroom in a hurry

 

[Robert747]

Big Fred was the fattest man in town

 

[scottsma]

on his face there was always a frown

 

[Grumbletum]

His enormous girth

 

[scottsma]

filled others with mirth

 

[Grumbletum]

You should've seen him in a hospital gown!

 

[scottsma]

Bobby squeezed into his speedos one day

 

[Robert747]

The ladies all screamed 'Nay'

 

[scottsma]

But Bobby was proud of his body

 

[CLynn]

And he was just a tad naughty

 

[Robert747]

and struggled to keep the ladies at bay

 

[MADiMarc]

Beverly headed to Long Island Sound

 

[sawdust]

Skipping stones, she was determined and bound.

 

[Aura]

She looked for birds

 

[lager87]

but got hit with their terds!

 

[Robert747]

so screamed and frowned

 

[scottsma]

and said very rude words

 

[Robert747]

Erm - point of order the limerick had finished!

 

[scottsma]

Erm - point of order the limerick had finished!

I'm the first to admit when I'm wrong.Got carried away.Got those speedos on my mind.Can't sleep,can't eat,can't function properly.:sign0085:

 

[scottsma]

When Geordie was fishing the Tyne

 

[Robert747]

he caught Speedos on the end of his line

 

[scottsma]

ah ha I'm in luck

 

[Robert747]

'my usual trunks are a little bit yuck'

 

[scottsma]

a quick change and they will be mine

 

[scottsma]

'my usual trunks are a little bit yuck'

Not unlike your slippers then !!:wink:

 

[Robert747]

The Genie of the Lamp granted a special wish

 

[scottsma]

you can have mushy peas,chips and battered fish

 

[CLynn]

but money you can have none

 

[scottsma]

the Grants have all gone

 

[Robert747]

Well I will have the delightful dish

2/10

 

[Grumbletum]

While sailing to the Isle of Rum

 

[Robert747]

Drinking songs Fred did hum

 

[scottsma]

He sang about treasure and loose women too

 

[Robert747]

after three days he had caused a dreadful hulabaloo

 

[scottsma]

after loosing his speedos and showing his b*m

 

[Aura]

There once lived a cat in Richmound

 

[Robert747]

in his house a mouse was found

 

[beefcake]

Not small,but big and round

 

[CLynn]

It's eyes were eerily red

 

[scottsma]

and it lived under the fat cats bed

 

[Robert747]

Fat cat flattened it with a leap and a bound

 

[scottsma]

this bl**dy limericks going round and round.

 

[scottsma]

Tonite is the night that THE GAMES begin

 

[CLynn]

And with today's limerick, we surely shall WIN!!!

 

[scottsma]

we'll yell and we'll cheer

 

[CLynn]

And possibly down a few beers!

 

[scottsma]

With the Rest of the World and our KIN.

 

[scottsma]

I think this is one of our better ones Cheryl.See what Kylies stalker says.Signing off now as the Olympic Ceremony starts soon.Get yourself away home Pet.Toodles.

 

[CLynn]

Awww, why thank you, Carol! Enjoy the games, I will hopefully catch some tonight. Leaving in a bit to take my son (11) to church as they are off to church camp for 4 days....on his birthday, no less.

 

[scottsma]

tell him Happy Birthday from his auntie Carol across the pond.How old is he and whats he called

 

[CLynn]

I will do that, Carol. He is young master Jacob, and turning 11 today, heading into the 6th grade. Him being gone will bother me much more than him to be gone, I am sure.

 

[Robert747]

There was a little old lady from New York

 

[scottsma]

who did nothing but chatter and talk

 

[Gra]

She was a great Farter

 

[scottsma]

Her husband a martyr

 

[Robert747]

who enjoyed a mighty long walk

 

[Trysha]

There once was a lady of Spain

 

[Robert747]

who was exceptionally vain

 

[scottsma]

she primped and she preened

 

[Trysha]

Her suitors she screened

 

[StarGirrrrl]

Until she found one who was sane