Limericks: Rhyme a Line at a Time

[Jessi]

Like me, he had no time to dine

 

[Sha0913]

So he carried a bag

 

[Trysha]

and held up a flag

 

[Trysha]

to find out the best place to dine

 

[sawdust]

We love to hate the drug called pred,

 

[Grumbletum]

A pill that strikes us with fear and dread

 

[Cookie]

Our faces get puffy

 

[Trysha]

we sometimes get huffy

 

[Trysha]

as side effects move in our heads

 

[Trysha]

There once was a tortoise named speedy

 

[Crohn's Mom]

He found himself to be quite needy

 

[PVail]

His name was colitis

 

[sawdust]

Toenails, he found he could bite his,

(that's for you, Emily)

 

[Grumbletum]

A habit that's really quite seedy

 

[Trysha]

there once was a bluebird named Sparky

 

[Grumbletum]

Who'd peck and get generally narky

 

[Trysha]

He met a fine hen and cheered up no end

 

[sawdust]

So his joy helps him sing like a larky.

 

[Sha0913]

I started the day just fine

 

[PVail]

but just about half past nine !

 

[Emily]

it started to rain

 

[Sha0913]

I wanted to complain

 

[Cookie]

But I knew I'd have to stand in line

 

[sawdust]

When I dream if only I could,

 

[scottsma]

there once was an aussie called bruce

 

[Sha0913]

When I dream if only I could,

I think If only I should

 

[Grumbletum]

I had to rush to the loo

 

[Grumbletum]

Ignore that last one!! Bit slow tonight ...

 

[sawdust]

When I dream if only I could,

I think If only I should

And then I recall,

 

[Grumbletum]

Because, after all

 

[sawdust]

Trying is preferable to "would."

 

[CLynn]

There once was a forum we all used

 

[Cookie]

because it helped to give us some clues

 

[Jessi]

we'd read and we'd write

 

[Cookie]

all day and all night

 

[Jessi]

Until all our fingers were bruised!

 

[sawdust]

A blind, one-armed colorectal surgeon named Fred,

 

[Grumbletum]

Was standing by my hospital bed

 

[CLynn]

With an evil grin he did say

 

[StarGirrrrl]

Hey, guess what i'm taking out today!

 

[sawdust]

Doc, you're talking to my bum, not my head!

 

[Trysha]

there once was a fella name Soo

 

[Jessi]

Who worked late at night in a zoo

 

[Grumbletum]

When a lion did escape

 

[Dexky]

Soo thought, with duct tape

 

[Grumbletum]

To form a big cat catching lassoo.

 

[sawdust]

Fred, the surgeon, picked another chart,

 

[Grumbletum]

But could only see it in part

 

[Trysha]

He said what a jigsaw

 

[Grumbletum]

With a loud guffaw

 

[scottsma]

but I think it will clear when you fart

 

[Jessi]

There once lived a cow named Bessie

 

[Trysha]

who was not especially dressy

 

[Jessi]

She wore tennies and sweats

 

[Emily]

Her hair was a mess

 

[Jessi]

She really was no contess-y.

 

[sawdust]

When you're on the commode and without a book,

 

[Jessi]

And there isn't anything at which to look

 

[CLynn]

Sing a song

 

[sawdust]

There's nothing wrong

 

[Grumbletum]

Well, only if you start to puke!

 

[scottsma]

there once was a fairy called Mary

 

[sawdust]

Who granted wishes of dairy.

 

[CLynn]

To those who longed for it....

 

[sawdust]

And those who could have a bit,

 

[scottsma]

but for those who cannot, be wary

 

[Trysha]

there once was a songster named Blue

 

[scottsma]

who had a todo with his poo

 

[Grumbletum]

He got really mad

 

[CLynn]

And then, quite sad...

 

[Grumbletum]

So started to sing 'Waterloo.'

 

[CLynn]

His singing was lacking...

 

[Grumbletum]

His voice it kept cracking

 

[littlefreebird]

but he didn't care

 

[Trysha]

because of a flare

 

[Jessi]

And off he did run to the loo.

 

[Trysha]

there once was a rabbit called Lou

 

[Grumbletum]

Who lived in the middle of Peru

 

[CLynn]

He was so thin

 

[Trysha]

and never could win

 

[Grumbletum]

The lady bunny he wanted to woo.

 

[Trysha]

Strolling through the woods one day

 

[Grumbletum]

I was approached by a wolf, big and grey

 

[sawdust]

I froze while his eyes narrowed.

 

[DustyKat]

His smile was snarly and yellowed

 

[scottsma]

but he had lots of gardening to do

 

[CLynn]

Turnips, tomatos, and carrots too

 

[Trysha]

A busy wolf no time to stew

 

[sawdust]

<-- One day there was a confounded forum poster,

 

[Grumbletum]

Who was also a very big boaster

 

[Trysha]

who had no time for duties roster

 

[sawdust]

or adopted animals to foster,

 

[Grumbletum]

He once adopted a bear

 

[CLynn]

A bear who had no hair

 

[Trysha]

How nice that he could care

 

[Grumbletum]

And he called his new pal Dr Foster.

 

[Dexky]

Um, is that one finished yet?

Helen, from Hebrides came

 

[Trysha]

Heading for the hall of fame

 

[Dexky]

a true island hopper

 

[sawdust]

and forum eye-popper,